Falling for a friend...

[BehindYou]

Hi all,

 

This is my first post, so be kind .

 

I have feelings for my of my closest female friends and recently, she confided in me that she recieved an email from my best (male) friend that tells how he likes her too.

 

I was wondering how I should precede?

I wouldn't want to lose either as a friend.

 

Thanks,

BehindYou

[glittergurl]

We're missing a lot of background information here.

 

How long have you known both friends? How did she react about the e-mail? (excited? neutral? shocked?). Does she hang out more with him than with you? Do you just have a crush on her or is this real solid love that's been there for a long time?

 

My first impression is, if she hasn't given any clear signals that she likes you more than him, then you should probably just back off. At least if their friendship matters to you, because you might end up losing both.

[BehindYou]

Sorry for the lack of info above, I've known both for almost three years now, but the two of them have known each other for about five.

 

I feel it's real solid love that's been there since I met her, but dismissed it as a physical attraction.

 

She dosen't really hang out with him more than me, she talks to me more freely but he is always the guy in the group who is able to make everyone laugh.

[rakula]

How does she feel about your male friend?

[BehindYou]

I'm not really sure. She asked me for advice on how she should respond, because she won't see him in person till the coming Monday.

 

I tried to be a median, not giving away how I feel and I asked her how would she respond if he asked her out. The only response I got was a shrug of the shoulders.

[Aintayankee]

Tell her that you can't give her advice, because you have had feelings for her for a while and you like her as well. Then tell her to do what she feels she wants to. Then it gives both you and him an equal and fair chance.