popey Posted October 4, 2007 Share Posted October 4, 2007 If you like someone, you will at least send a text within a week, Period. Maybe he has a LDR, and its his gf in for 10 days. Absolutely no reason for someone you've been dating for 2 months to cease to exist for 10 days b/c a friend is in town. Link to post Share on other sites
Author crazy_grl Posted October 4, 2007 Author Share Posted October 4, 2007 Maybe he has a LDR, and its his gf in for 10 days. Nope. I've met the friend who's visiting, and my friend would have told me if he had a gf. Link to post Share on other sites
uniqueone Posted October 4, 2007 Share Posted October 4, 2007 I bolded the parts where you crossed the line into needy behavior. That's exactly the kind of thing that would push a guy away. Let him come to you and don't bring it up later if he doesn't call. Or, if you're unwilling to accept his poor communication then drop him. But the worst thing you can do is pester him about not calling because that is guaranteed to push him away. I don't think the OP is needy. We have to stop acting like women are needy when they expect to be treated decently and with respect by a man! It's not needy.....it's called respect. (this might also apply to men being treated by women as well but for this purpose, I'm using women being treated by men as the example) Asking someone why you haven't heard from them in awhile isn't needy. What gets me is when a woman will be physically close to a guy and then get told she's needy if she expects to hear from him right away. That's not needy! That's NORMAL. Women...the only way that this outlook on "neediness" is going to change is if you don't buy into it. It's WOMEN who are buying into the fact that they are needy if they want to know where they stand with a guy! Don't follow the herd, ladies.......don't let some societal propaganda tell you how you should behave and feel. [getting off the soapbox now.....] Link to post Share on other sites
uniqueone Posted October 4, 2007 Share Posted October 4, 2007 This guy made it pretty clear that for 10 days, he would be busy with his out of town friend, and you shouldn't expect to hear from him. Since you've only been dating 2 months, I don't think he has an obligation to call you on a certain schedule. By texting him, not only once, but twice in this time that he defined, you disrespected a boundary that he had made. Boundary? It was a friggin phone call....not a home invasion. And....as you experience life more and more....you'll find that there are no clearcut boundaries. You can't dictate when people are allowed to call you and when they aren't allowed. Life is fluid like that. Link to post Share on other sites
popey Posted October 4, 2007 Share Posted October 4, 2007 I don't think the OP is needy. We have to stop acting like women are needy when they expect to be treated decently and with respect by a man! It's not needy.....it's called respect. (this might also apply to men being treated by women as well but for this purpose, I'm using women being treated by men as the example) Asking someone why you haven't heard from them in awhile isn't needy. What gets me is when a woman will be physically close to a guy and then get told she's needy if she expects to hear from him right away. That's not needy! That's NORMAL. Women...the only way that this outlook on "neediness" is going to change is if you don't buy into it. It's WOMEN who are buying into the fact that they are needy if they want to know where they stand with a guy! Don't follow the herd, ladies.......don't let some societal propaganda tell you how you should behave and feel. [getting off the soapbox now.....] that's right. "You're too clingy, too needy." is the self rationalizing response that takes the place of, "wtf?! I want to enjoy the affiming, warm benefits of being relationshipy with you, but only on my whim. why are you being so suffocating by daring to have your own wants?!" Link to post Share on other sites
uniqueone Posted October 4, 2007 Share Posted October 4, 2007 that's right. "You're too clingy, too needy." is the self rationalizing response that takes the place of, "wtf?! I want to enjoy the affiming, warm benefits of being relationshipy with you, but only on my whim. why are you being so suffocating by daring to have your own wants?!" Exactly!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author crazy_grl Posted October 4, 2007 Author Share Posted October 4, 2007 popey and uniqueone, you two are too funny. Link to post Share on other sites
Timberlane Posted October 4, 2007 Share Posted October 4, 2007 I didn't want to mention it before, but now that I know he's a jerk, I don't feel bad about it. Part of the reason I'm not too disappointed is that when we were messing around, he was kind of clumsy. It made me wonder whether he'd actually be any good in bed. And I always got the impression that he might be a little too conservative in the bedroom for me. Ah, the sweet sweet balm that is this one thought. Can't miss what you suspect was not worth the wait. Link to post Share on other sites
Author crazy_grl Posted October 14, 2007 Author Share Posted October 14, 2007 Wow. This guy... I went to hang out with my friend (who is his roommate) to celebrate her getting a new job. This guy was there and for one of the two brief moments I paid attention to him, he and two other guys were busy flirting with some girls. He left with all those people and we stayed for awhile to do more dancing, singing, and drinking before we went back to my friend's house. I was sleeping on their couch, and right after he got home, my phone rang and woke me up. He came and sat down next to me and asked if I wanted a ride to my car in the morning. Then we started talking about random stuff like playing in the snow when we little. He put his arm over me, which I didn't really mind much. Then he ended up asking me if I wanted a kiss. WTF? I didn't even answer, because I couldn't think of a polite way to say "hell no". What would possess the guy to think that I would want to kiss him? I felt insulted by what he said to me before, now I feel really insulted. I don't know how drunk he was. He didn't seem to be, but he better have been pretty freakin drunk to have had the nerve to ask me that. Link to post Share on other sites
Ariadne Posted October 14, 2007 Share Posted October 14, 2007 Hey, He put his arm over me, which I didn't really mind much. Then he ended up asking me if I wanted a kiss. See? How can they resist you? And now that I saw your picture I know that you are a 10 overall. He'll probably be back asking you to be his gf. Ariadne Link to post Share on other sites
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