whichwayisup Posted October 6, 2007 Share Posted October 6, 2007 By the way, Which Way.....a "blonde moment"? What might that be? As opposed to a brunette one, I suppose... Sorry to be sensitive, but as a (natural) blonde PH D I thought those jokes went out with Polish ones.....(the Polish now being all millionaires...uh you get the point) OE Sorry OE. I didn't mean to offend you. Link to post Share on other sites
CAT100 Posted October 6, 2007 Share Posted October 6, 2007 What is the actual point of this thread??! Clearly if someone is an OW then they know at times they are not number 1, and even if my MM was not married I would think his KIDS would be number 1, so.... what point is the OP making?! Do not see the point of this discussion whatsoever Link to post Share on other sites
CAT100 Posted October 6, 2007 Share Posted October 6, 2007 . i am getting tired of the incessant need some of you have to tell the OW how their MM lie to them all the time! not everything they tell us is a lie, just as not everything they tell their W's are lies. hell, not everything i tell him is the truth either! I agree. God can we move on already... I need a yawning smiley face here Link to post Share on other sites
Lyssa Posted October 6, 2007 Share Posted October 6, 2007 To all the BS who claim their Hs are honest and not in love with OW, please don't make me cry with laughter... A lot of people here are in serious denial - yup. Link to post Share on other sites
GreenEyedLady Posted October 6, 2007 Share Posted October 6, 2007 A lot of people here are in serious denial - yup. Oh yeah...But denial makes reconciliation so much easier... Link to post Share on other sites
LucreziaBorgia Posted October 6, 2007 Share Posted October 6, 2007 To be perfectly honest, MM relies on a certain amount of denial in both his W and his OW. In fact, they count on it and manipulate the situation in such a way as to result in the maximum amount from each. That way, he gets the maximum of what he wants: his needs met from two sources, from two women who are more than happy to supply them while telling themselves that "MM loves me best". Link to post Share on other sites
justice Posted October 6, 2007 Share Posted October 6, 2007 Just my opinion, but I don't think the OW or the OM would have any right to pull these childish stunts. I also don't think the OM or OW have any rights in this situation of seeing person's who are married. You just have to take what you can get so to speak. One of the drawbacks of dating or sleeping around with someone who is married. The BS is the one who rightfully is entitled to all of their spouse not just bits and pieces. Link to post Share on other sites
GreenEyedLady Posted October 6, 2007 Share Posted October 6, 2007 Just my opinion, but I don't think the OW or the OM would have any right to pull these childish stunts. I also don't think the OM or OW have any rights in this situation of seeing person's who are married. You just have to take what you can get so to speak. One of the drawbacks of dating or sleeping around with someone who is married. The BS is the one who rightfully is entitled to all of their spouse not just bits and pieces. But the MM has the right to sleep around? Cmon, put the blame where it belongs... And you don't have to take what you can get when he puts you first...He gives what you demand... It's not a matter of entitlement...Perhaps that idea is what gets alot of M's in hot water... Link to post Share on other sites
luvmy2ns Posted October 6, 2007 Share Posted October 6, 2007 To be perfectly honest, MM relies on a certain amount of denial in both his W and his OW. In fact, they count on it and manipulate the situation in such a way as to result in the maximum amount from each. That way, he gets the maximum of what he wants: his needs met from two sources, from two women who are more than happy to supply them while telling themselves that "MM loves me best". LB, I'll say it again. You're awesome. I did say on another thread about why people love their MM's so much that it's because the MM is a master manipulator. Your post says that, but much more eloquently. Link to post Share on other sites
mineymoe Posted October 6, 2007 Share Posted October 6, 2007 I have an even better idea! Why don't you go find a board for the bitter jilted ex wife?? I was cheated on twice and guess what?? I got over it!! It is truly unfortunate that as I have gotten older life gets more complicated but I am very happy to have found someone I truly love and I know, without all the tests and bs that he truly loves me. I would not force him to leave his family, his ex wife is probably as crazy and as bitter as, well YOU!! Who wants to deal with that?? plus the combined 6 children, one of his has inherited his ex wives OCD, we are happy as is!! Maybe once the kids are all older but for now I am happy being his precious little secret and having him be mine. Link to post Share on other sites
lovernotafighter Posted October 6, 2007 Share Posted October 6, 2007 And to all the OW who claim they don't want MM to leave his wife or that he's "working on leaving", please, don't make me laugh. A lot of people here are in serious denial. right coming from you who doesn't even know the difference between her husband cheating on her and having a cup of coffee. we should all start listening to you when you don't even know whats up in your own life?? ok sure You are not his wife or family. The hospital staff will not allow you in his room if he is in critical condition. Your place in his life will have clear boundaries when the hospital staff closes his door in it. IO can you please stick with one identity for the rest of the class please Link to post Share on other sites
Lyssa Posted October 6, 2007 Share Posted October 6, 2007 Why is it that when things go down, they bring up about visiting MM at the hospital?? Link to post Share on other sites
lovernotafighter Posted October 6, 2007 Share Posted October 6, 2007 Why is it that when things go down, they bring up about visiting MM at the hospital?? they think it's a ace up their sleeve Link to post Share on other sites
mopar crazy Posted October 6, 2007 Share Posted October 6, 2007 To all the BS who claim their Hs are honest and not in love with OW, please don't make me cry with laughter... A lot of people here are in serious denial - yup. I thought my FWH loved the OW. When I read all the letters he wrote to her telling her he loved her, how he wanted to spend the rest of his life w/ her, etc, it hurt like HELL! When my H wanted to work on the M I agreed, but not right away. I sought IC and brought the letters to my counselor. He read them all. And the first thing he said after he got done was "Did YOU ever think you were in love but you really weren't?" It made total sense. I don't think H was actually in love w/ the OW, what I think he was in love w/ was how she paid attention to him, made him feel like a HS boy again, ya get the picture. He was out of the M. We went to court for CS and visitation. He was going on w/ his life w/ the OW and I w/ our children. A month later he came crawling back. If he REALLY did love the OW he would have continued the D like he wanted and stayed w/ her. Link to post Share on other sites
nittygritty Posted October 6, 2007 Share Posted October 6, 2007 ... lets try an experiment! I am serious... this is for those of you who really think you are number one...let's find out if you are actually/factually no.1. This is not a malicious/sarcastic/sadistic post... I'm serious... this is just to see if your eyes need to be opened or if everyone else needs to shut up. Here's how: 1.Tell him to leave his BS and go live with you. 2.Tell him to come over when you want him to, not when he can conveniently trick his wife... heck wake him up (while he is sleeping next to his wife) and tell him to come over right on the spot. 3.Tell him you want his wife to know about you so you won't be the "dirty little secret" anymore. 4.Call him while he is sleeping with his wife and tell him to stop and come sleep with you. 5.Ask him to spend every holiday with you because you miss him/are lonely. 6.Tell him you need some money out of his paycheck 7.Tell him you want to be the one to live in his house with him instead of the wife and kids. 8.The list goes on... readers feel free to add... OW, when you conduct these experiments, let us know how it turns out. If you need support after you find your results, we will be here for you. Seriously, and if you are right, then no one can say you aren't then, right? 9. Tell him you want to attend the next High School reunion together, his or yours. 10. Tell him to come with you to your parents for both Thanksgiving Dinner and Christmas morning breakfast. See if he is able to make either. 11. Tell him that you want the two of you to start going to church together on Sunday mornings. 12. Tell him that you want him to buy himself a seperate life insurance that names you as the beneficiary and to be included as a beneficiary in his will so that you are taken care of, if he dies. 13. Tell him that you want to marry him and have children but since he is unwilling to divorce his wife at this time, then you would at least like to have a baby with him now as a sign of your mutual love. 14. Tell him to attend the next family member who dies funeral with you. Love is as love does. If a man that your having sex with is unwilling to have you as the only woman that he is exclusively having sex with AND shares the majority of his life with why invest in the relationship? Pick a better investment. One that is emotionally available and willing to be your life partner. Your cheating yourself out of a recipricating relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
Lyssa Posted October 6, 2007 Share Posted October 6, 2007 He was out of the M. We went to court for CS and visitation. He was going on w/ his life w/ the OW and I w/ our children. A month later he came crawling back. If he REALLY did love the OW he would have continued the D like he wanted and stayed w/ her. Thanks for sharing your story. I'm sure he didn't REALLY love the OW. Link to post Share on other sites
OpenBook Posted October 6, 2007 Share Posted October 6, 2007 9. Tell him you want to attend the next High School reunion together, his or yours. 10. Tell him to come with you to your parents for both Thanksgiving Dinner and Christmas morning breakfast. See if he is able to make either. 11. Tell him that you want the two of you to start going to church together on Sunday mornings. 12. Tell him that you want him to buy himself a seperate life insurance that names you as the beneficiary and to be included as a beneficiary in his will so that you are taken care of, if he dies. 13. Tell him that you want to marry him and have children but since he is unwilling to divorce his wife at this time, then you would at least like to have a baby with him now as a sign of your mutual love. 14. Tell him to attend the next family member who dies funeral with you. Love is as love does. Now this one makes me laugh. You're saying these indicators are all proof of love. Bull honkey. They are simply indicators of toeing the line with society's expectations. How you present yourself outwardly. Nothing to do with who or what you love. Some 60% of those sitting in the pews at church, or standing solemnly at the funeral, are cheating or have cheated. Sorry, but this one cuts no ice. Link to post Share on other sites
OWoman Posted October 6, 2007 Share Posted October 6, 2007 9. Tell him you want to attend the next High School reunion together, his or yours. 10. Tell him to come with you to your parents for both Thanksgiving Dinner and Christmas morning breakfast. See if he is able to make either. 11. Tell him that you want the two of you to start going to church together on Sunday mornings. 12. Tell him that you want him to buy himself a seperate life insurance that names you as the beneficiary and to be included as a beneficiary in his will so that you are taken care of, if he dies. 13. Tell him that you want to marry him and have children but since he is unwilling to divorce his wife at this time, then you would at least like to have a baby with him now as a sign of your mutual love. 14. Tell him to attend the next family member who dies funeral with you. :lmao::lmao::lmao:What a weird list! Neither of us do any of these, on our own or with anyone else. It would certainly be an act of love for either of us to agree to any of these kinds of things!!!:lmao::lmao::lmao: Link to post Share on other sites
lovernotafighter Posted October 6, 2007 Share Posted October 6, 2007 hahhaha!!! even if I was single and my MM was single or what ever asking questions like that would make me a nut case class A+ wow nitty gritty your idea of love is really REALLY f*$ked up!! hahaha!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Impudent Oyster Posted October 6, 2007 Share Posted October 6, 2007 To all the BS who claim their Hs are honest and not in love with OW, please don't make me cry with laughter... A lot of people here are in serious denial - yup. There isn't a BS on the planet who will claim their H is honest, so your statement is moot. And if the MM is so in love with the OW, why, when the proverbial sh#t hits the fan, 99% of the time does the OW get thrown to the wolves? That ain't love, and if you think it is, you're even more deluded than I thought. Link to post Share on other sites
Lyssa Posted October 6, 2007 Share Posted October 6, 2007 I wouldn't want to be anyone's partner who comes up with those lists. I would have do everything his way or it's the highway, huh?? Link to post Share on other sites
Lyssa Posted October 6, 2007 Share Posted October 6, 2007 Thank goodness I don't let anyone make me do something I don't want to do or agree with. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jinnah Posted October 6, 2007 Author Share Posted October 6, 2007 well now your divorced so doesn't seem like your number one either guess the only number one is the cheating spouse go figure :laugh: Just goes to show you don't know anything about me! I was divorced (and gladly so)... he was an abuser... the cheating was my ticket out... I already knew I wasn't number one with him... and? I never said I was! I didn't care to be number one to such a horrible person!!! I am now happily remarried to a wonderful man that does not cheat. Link to post Share on other sites
Impudent Oyster Posted October 6, 2007 Share Posted October 6, 2007 I would not force him to leave his family, his ex wife is probably as crazy and as bitter as, well YOU!! Sweetheart you couldn't force him to leave his family... Link to post Share on other sites
Lyssa Posted October 6, 2007 Share Posted October 6, 2007 There isn't a BS on the planet who will claim their H is honest, so your statement is moot. And if the MM is so in love with the OW, why, when the proverbial sh#t hits the fan, 99% of the time does the OW get thrown to the wolves? That ain't love, and if you think it is, you're even more deluded than I thought. Ah yes, my statement is moot.... of course. 99% huh? Lol - I wonder where you got that percentage from. Oh don't bother, I'm sure it's made up. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts