confused gemini Posted April 24, 2003 Share Posted April 24, 2003 O.k. i met this guy about 7 or 8 months ago. we talked and i gave him my number, but then i never talked to him again. then i saw him again, and we talked some more, he applogized for not callin. so we did talk a little after that, then we would go several weeks in between talking, but now we talk all the time. he always talks about hanging out and doing stuff, but it never works out. my friends all ask if we are going to get together. they say that it seems like he totally likes me, but he wont make the move. i like him alot, but i dont want to tell him, because im afraid of what he might say. how do i let him know that im really interested without saying it to his face? Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted April 24, 2003 Share Posted April 24, 2003 If you want to have a happy life in the 21st century, you're going to have to learn how to ask for what you want. The next time you're talking to him, let him know you're not interested in an eternal telephone relationship. Ask him what sorts of things he likes to do OFF the telephone. Then ask him if you'd love to join him the next time he does something...movie, concert, walk or whatever. You can't remain stubbornly silent about things like these. You either have to ask...or get left in the dust. Now, if you don't want to ask, the next time he calls you tell him you can't talk for long because you have plans to go out...and then go out somewhere. That will drive him out of his mind and if ever he will ask you out, that will be the time. If a guy thinks he's got competition, that's a great motivator. Link to post Share on other sites
yes Posted April 24, 2003 Share Posted April 24, 2003 what about these guys who say "well, if she goes out with other guys, apparently she doesn't like me, so i'm not going to ask her"... is that BS? -yes Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted April 24, 2003 Share Posted April 24, 2003 yes WRITES: "what about these guys who say "well, if she goes out with other guys, apparently she doesn't like me, so i'm not going to ask her"... is that BS?" Not only is it BS, but it is absolutely insane for a guy to think that a girl is going to sit around for an eternity waiting to be asked out. If the guy takes this attitude, he's nuttier than a fruitcake and should be avoided at all costs. People should use all caution possible not to date crazy people. Link to post Share on other sites
yes Posted April 24, 2003 Share Posted April 24, 2003 "People should use all caution possible not to date crazy people." Lovely! And thanks for that clarification. A guy once said that if too many people ask me out, he'll stop pursuing me (i found out he said this to a friend of his)... I was pretty surprised to hear, heh. -yes Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted April 24, 2003 Share Posted April 24, 2003 YOU WRITE: "A guy once said that if too many people ask me out, he'll stop pursuing me." A guy who has knowledge of how many people are asking you out either has your phone tapped, conducting an on-going private investigation into your life, listening through your window, following you, listening to gossip, questioning friends, etc. You don't need someone like that. That is just plain nuts. If he sees you out with lots of guys and decides against going out with you, he obviously feels inferior and is not up to the competition and you don't need anybody like that either. Lack of confidence or feelings of inferiority are never attractive to a lady. A guy who is truly interested in getting to know a lady will ask her out no matter who or how many others are interested. He would rather be rejected than run the risk of losing out on something special. Men who are fond of a lady and who are trying to build up the courage to ask her out typically get extremely movitivate when the lady's attentions are shifting. It just works that way...that that's a bit nuts too. Sorry, I didn't create humans and therefore can't explain their behavior. I can only observe and report. Link to post Share on other sites
yes Posted April 24, 2003 Share Posted April 24, 2003 true true - no inconfident guys, please. he knew because the college crowd is oozing gossip - everybody knows everything. In my case, these guys were asking friends for advice before asking me, and that's how it got spread around. Anyway, it's history now. Have a good evening! -yes Link to post Share on other sites
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