she got cold feet, canceled wedding, I get girlfriend, its been 4 months now

[Chrome Barracuda]

Lost66, just FYI as a lady I disagree with this. We women like to be treated special. We also sometimes have the attitude that ANY guy would pay for our date, so if you don't, we tend to think you're cheap. Cheap is definitely a turn-off for me... you don't have to spend a lot, but don't act like you're too good to pay for my two cocktails and my salad lol. BUT after a few dates, the lady should offer to pay for YOU, to show you she's not about money and to thank you for your last few treats. That's my theory anyway. I'm sorry but most of the girls I know, including myself and my sister, would NOT see a guy a second time if he doesn't at least offer to pay for the first date. Eww. That's just not how it's done, at least where we live.

 

Bullsh**!!!!!

 

And that's the problem, it's a turn off for you, but damn why dont ladies in this day and age of independance and their financial wealth pay for a man, buy him things and treat him to dinner? Why must it all come outta our damn pockets!

 

And then we feel jipped if we dont get some at the end of the night?!!?

 

I mean we paying like for $50 dinner, gas money, parking and then when it comes time to get nice and ready your like, Maybe next time, or maybe next week or I have another date I'll see you later. That's like using a man just for a good time! that isnt right! He's not cheap , he's rich! and plus if a woman is capable of showing me she can pay her own way, it shows me she can be financially responsible and doesnt need my money to be dependant on! So take that!

 

Cheap, my black a**!!!

[Sun_Conure]

Chrome Barracuda, I suggest you start earning more money ASAP. You do sound cheap and it's highly unattractive

 

I am an attorney and I can pay for myself. But if a guy makes me pay on a first date, I am not going to see him again. It's not about money, it's about general attitude. Cheapness is a red flag, which means he either has financial issues (not fun) or he is generally cheap (not good). Either way I am out ...

 

And come on, $50 for a dinner for two .. It's not that much. Where do you take your dates? Cheesecake Factory?

[writeon]

Chrome Barracuda, I suggest you start earning more money ASAP. You do sound cheap and it's highly unattractive

 

I am an attorney and I can pay for myself. But if a guy makes me pay on a first date, I am not going to see him again. It's not about money, it's about general attitude. Cheapness is a red flag, which means he either has financial issues (not fun) or he is generally cheap (not good). Either way I am out ...

 

And come on, $50 for a dinner for two .. It's not that much. Where do you take your dates? Cheesecake Factory?

 

I feel the same way Sun Conure and I am also an attorney! I am independent (put myself through college/ grad school etc.) and I make good money but in some ways I'm old fashioned in that I like a man to be gentlemanly and I like to be pampered now and then. Sorry Chrome but that is just my opinion, I guess we have our differences lol. A gal likes to be taken out and shown a fun time, NOT be able to tell that the man is racking up the bill in his head all night. Again, sorry, but, ewww.

[lost66]

So that girl I was "dating", we went out on sat night. I took her to a very nice dinner and we went back to my house, watched football, and messed around. The next day she was texting me things about love. Asking me if I could love someone, etc, etc. I told her I wanted to take things slowwww. So, i get an email from her this morning telling me that I'm not the guy for her, and good luck! ha! She I believe was lonely, not many friends, from a different country and has a 10 year old kid. I think she was really itching to get pregnant, she mentioned it a few times and was looking for love now. I got the text and I am not responding. Before I would, but now I see that she has some type of issues and I don't want to deal with them. Also, the kid thing, she would have to be close to perfect for me to take on that responsibility.

 

I am leaving to go out of town for work on wed then flying to the east coast for an NFL game with 3 friends. I feel I am totally ready for love again but, I am going to be picky and if I break some hearts along the way so be it, better them than me. I need to take things sllllloooowwww. It is very hard for me (or guys for that matter) to not try to have sex with the girl. After all, to me, it is definately important for the sexual attraction to be there. But, when you have sex it makes the breakup that much harder.

 

I am having a pretty good day today emotionally. I feel stronger and a little more comfortable being single. Please god let me find someone that I can share life with!

[Sun_Conure]

lost66,

 

If I were you, I would date girls without getting into serious relationships for a while. You do not need to sleep with them (that could lead them on). This way you will find out what you like and do not like, what you want and do not want. And there will be time when you meet a girl you would really like. When that happens, you will know that and you will have skills not to mess up that relationship.

[Chrome Barracuda]

I feel the same way Sun Conure and I am also an attorney! I am independent (put myself through college/ grad school etc.) and I make good money but in some ways I'm old fashioned in that I like a man to be gentlemanly and I like to be pampered now and then. Sorry Chrome but that is just my opinion, I guess we have our differences lol. A gal likes to be taken out and shown a fun time, NOT be able to tell that the man is racking up the bill in his head all night. Again, sorry, but, ewww.

 

I never said make her pay for the whole damn thing!

 

I said make her pay for at least half or offer to pay for half. I dont mind spending for a date and whatnot but it becomes tedious and very disrespectful if she's just using me for a good time at my expense.

 

I'm sorry ladies I'm not cheap but frugal.

 

All that pampering is in the past, if she cant afford to pay I understand but if she's making enough or more than me I aint footing the bill alone. The first date fine, but after that gloves is off.

 

Oh and lost good news for you getting rid of the potential psycho you seen the red flags we was talking about. That's how you do it.

 

Lay the pipe, check for flags, as soon as they pop up you bounce! lol.

[lost66]

Right, red flags! I will now look for them. When I see one I will say "red flag" to my self and actually make a mental note. I feel that I have put way too much into the outside beauty of the woman.

 

As far as paying for dinner, I would never make a woman pay unless they insisted. Just not my thing.

 

Feeling pretty good today. I am leaving to go out of town for work then to another state for an NFL game, time with my buddies, much needed...

[lost66]

Not doing well today. Thinking about her. Xmas is gonna be hard without her or alone i should say. Yes, I am very lonely and there is nobody to talk to about it. I'm not close with my mother or my father and my grandma just wouldn't understand. I feel betrayed. I never have cried this much. I have no single friends. All my friends have kids. I am lonely. That bIthc got pregnant by someone else? I am hurting.

[lost66]

I have been feeling good lately. As I said before, I have been working out a lot to relieve the stress I have been going through for the past 6 months. Last night I went out and saw a group of friends including an ex girlfriend and got a bunch of compliments on the physical shape I was in! My ex and her friend said "wow you look great"! Great feeling! I feel that I am back!!! Exercise has been a huge release for me. Still can't wait to find a g/f but I know 2008 will be the year!

[Chrome Barracuda]

That's great man!!!

 

Next year 2008! is gonna be a great year for everyone.

 

I need to loose a little weight for myself. Bally's it's too expensive. lol.

 

Doesnt it feel good to know you can still turn heads. Your ex' had a problem but it wasnt about you. IT was all on her. Take it for what it was.

 

I always do.

[sderenzi]

I am not gonna read all these comments by other ppl :L You will take my advice yes?!

 

You don't need a relationship, you never did. Ignore women and go out to do fun things for yourself. That divorce you say is messy and the mean husband, well... I bet you 100% the mean husband is acting exactly like you would've if you'd been married to that women. Don't get me wrong but I didn't realize just how much fault a marriage falling apart was based on the women herself. Women don't compromise, they want want want and never bargin. I bet this women will basically turn into a nightmare for you sometime in the future.

[Chrome Barracuda]

I am not gonna read all these comments by other ppl :L You will take my advice yes?!

 

You don't need a relationship, you never did. Ignore women and go out to do fun things for yourself. That divorce you say is messy and the mean husband, well... I bet you 100% the mean husband is acting exactly like you would've if you'd been married to that women. Don't get me wrong but I didn't realize just how much fault a marriage falling apart was based on the women herself. Women don't compromise, they want want want and never bargin. I bet this women will basically turn into a nightmare for you sometime in the future.

 

Um S' r u ok he wasnt married to that woman???

 

Why did you think he was married?

[kkthxbye]

Make good friends with her first. Slow down the rush part. Hell 30 is the new 20 they say. Start with a good foundation with common interests, there is a thread about what qualities are important in a match. It was very informative. Make sure it feels right. For me, the thought of NOT spending the rest of my days with this man never crossed my mind. That was when I knew.

 

And it seems to come when you're not looking so hard. Does anyone fish? When I'm lookin for the beer in the little red cooler, that's when the bobber goes crazy.