so called "charming" kid ruining my chances for a girlfriend

[poiuytrewq]

Wassup people........I got a bit of a problem here, and i hope i can get some good advice.

Well, last year, i was a normal teenager, played a sport, played the drums, did well in school, had many friends, including a girlfriend, i was healthy, my life was going great. I didnt want anything to change. Until this guy came along. This guy is my best friend (i had known him before he transferred to this school) who is, well, lets say GREAT with the ladies.

Last year, I had this girlfriend that was beautiful, funny, smart...everything. We had so much fun together, until we heard she was moving to florida. When that happened, my friend talked to her a LOT more. Im not sure what he was doing, but they started to like each other, she kinda forgot about me, she moved 3 states away to florida, havent heard from her since. So, yeah, i went through the whole depression thing about losing a girlfriend, then got over it. Thought it was nothing.

SO.....

Later that year, there was this other girl that i got involved with, yah know, same thing like last time. This time, once agaiin, i guess my friend all of a sudden liked her, and stole her before i had a chance.

When that happened, I could have stabbed the man when i realized the frustration and stress he has caused me. I thought maybe he wont do it again.

I was wrong. This year, I noticed this girl staring at me....like all the time. Wide-eyes, robot-like stare. She was cute(very cute), obviously she liked me, so we started talking, became good friends, etc etc

So guess what. We had this major science project that we had to do just recently. I finished mine, and i was proud of mine. I had decorations, all the info, even some humor. But, no, my friend came with this big contraption that demenstrated some hypothesis blahblahblah.....lets say his was WAY better than mine. Better than everyone else's. So that science class....that girl stopped staring at me, and i saw her start staring towards him.

*cough*damn*cough* excuse me.

And, on top of all this stress, I come up with this disease called epilepsy.

i need medication, i even have seizures every now and then. usually early in the morning.

Plus, we got a new spanish teacher. She is very strict and her class is difficult. I got a C in that class, and my butt went out of the National Junior Honor Society. I used to be the ONLY BOY in my class that was in it...now my friends the only boy (there arent many kids in our class)

 

My life took a wild turn. What happened? Disease, stress, losing girlfriends, and now oppurtunites to be more successfull in my future career??

 

I am frustrated everyday because of what my friend does. I can't have a girlfriend around him. Next year, i am transferring schools. Yeah thats how serious it is.

But that is months away.....can you guys please help me deal with this?

This kid is smarter, well now he's healthier than me sickness wise, funnier, sooo much better in school, and obviously more attractive than me.

I dont know how to handle this much stress and jealousy over girls, this has never happened to me.

Please help.

 

Thanks a lot.

~Austin

[Kamille]

Hi Austin!

 

That is a lot you are going through and I'm glad you've taken actions to switch school.

 

Do you have anyone in your family you could speak to about this? You sound like you have a case of mild blues, but talking to someone who knows you and only wishes you well could protect you from falling into depression. I recommend this because I was depressed as a teenager and I wouldn't wish it on my worst ennemy.

 

I think you sound like a really smart guy, granting a lot of importance to success and balance in your life and that you are going through what we all had to go through: adolescence.

 

I have to say though, for a teenager, I think you are well-spoken and seem to have your heart and head in the right place.

 

The problem with adolescence is that everyone around you, your friend, your ex-girlfriends etc are going through the same amount of changes as you are. It may feel like you are the only one struggling, but believe me, you are not.

 

For instance, did you ever wonder why your friend always feels the need to steal your girls? Most likely because he is jealous of YOU. You sound pretty smart, funny and attractive yourself. Perhaps a bit more quiet then he is, but believe me, that in itself most likely makes you intriguing and attractive.

 

It seems, after all, that girls notice you first.

 

I'm not sure if I understood correctly... Does having epilepsy mean you can no longer do the sports you enjoy? Hopefully not, because I think you should keep focusing on your activities - studying and sport. Even if you were cut from the team you were in, find other physical activities you enjoy.

 

Good luck Austin. I promise, it gets easier.

[poiuytrewq]

Hello, kamille

 

Believe me im glad as well....

 

Yes, I can talk to my dad most of the time, and my mom will help sometimes, but, most the time, they are all stressed or in a bad mood. Seriously, when they come home, they usually sit down and start ranting about their day and their employees.

My mom almost always has to go to work again for a few hours, and my dad talks to his cellphone more than me or my bro.

Really, they are good parents, for example, they bought me this computer because i said it looked cool. I could probably find sometime to talk to them, but one thing i hate talking to them about more than anything else is girls. I dont know. Ill see.

and the thing about stabbing my friend, yeah maybe that was a little dramatic, but i could have hurt him.

 

thanks ...i try to be smart

adolescence? this may sound strange coming from a 13 year old, but, i dont ever recall hearing that word. well, no, i mean i havent really heard the definition

 

haha thanks a lot....again....i dont quite understand how someone online could just be so nice to a random person, you know? and i admire you for that

 

so are you saying.....i think ive heard this somewhere.....that they are still growing up and havent really developed that full emotion of love? i mean that, well, while i love them, they are still young and constantly changing their minds? im not sure. i think i remember someone telling me that. i dont know.

that is strange, though.....i never thought of that

 

.....AH HAH! that makes sense.....wow, i think thats the problem....it makes sense......he never seemed surprised when i told him of my new girlfriend.....

and i just seemed to realize that he seems to lose a girlfriend everytime i gain one.....probably to start planning his menacing idea to steal her

a bit more quiet haha im a lot quieter than him. hes the kind of kid that will break his leg for someone to notice him. he seems unstoppable. and one thing that gets me....not being racial AT ALL.....he is, black, and all the girls are white. im white as well. how does he do that?

i dont get it. it must be adolescence, like what you said earlier

me, seemingly funny and attractive? why the heck are you so nice to me! thanks again!

so are you saying girls seem to like laid back kids better than....well all over the walls types of kids?

 

......it is....once again another thing that makes since

 

well, i learned today that the scan was not 100% positive...so i have a chance i will outgrow it :D

but i wont know until nov 1 at the very latest

plus i have an mri thursday...that will be interesting..

but, yeah, i am 100% sure it will prevent me from doing that. the physical doctor is sooo strict....

 

Thank you so much for your help. I will do a lot of thinking about what you have said for a while, thanks so much for your reply. I cant thank you enough.

 

bye

[Trojan John]

Just be yourself, forget trying to impress people. Your "friend" (and I use the term loosely because he is stealing your gfs) sounds like an attention whore, and in time people will notice this begin reacting negatively towards him. In the interim, I would suggest you get a new wingman; one that does not work against you.

 

You're still in h.s. -- notoriously the worst 4 years of anyone's life. Couple that with your new medical problems, and you're probably wondering what deity you've pissed off. Life gets better (if you let it). Just wait until uni. Women appreciate sincerity, intelligence, strong character and humour more than anything. So long as you build on those, you'll be fine. It just takes time.

 

Cheers.