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What do girls look for in a guy....ladies, please!


MexicanBillBacker

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MexicanBillBacker

Girls on this board. What are the things you look for in a guy? Good looks, great body? What makes you say woooooooooooooooooooow can't live without him.

 

I mean I know everyone's different so what works for you guys might be different for someone else but if I try to get a little something chances are I'll hit the one quality that my girl 's looking for.

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I'm a sucker for tall guys with nice teeth, masculine hands and beautiful eyes.

 

I like a guy who can charm the pants off of me. Not a fan of Mr. Dull. He has to be able to participate in a conversation... Being bilingual (at least) is nice. Good with kids. Can make fun of himself (this is a biggie for me)...a guy who is confident enough to be uninhibited.

 

I could go on and on... But these are just some of the things that popped into my head.

 

You trying to woo someone?

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What a woman says and what a woman does are 2 completely different things Mexican, so take their advice with a grain of salt. Don't take offense ladies, but you say you want a romantic guy, he gives you flowers, you lose interest ;). In my experience, & the experiences of others, the qualities that attract women are:

 

- Confidence

- Friendly personality

- Hygiene/Well groomed

- Style/Fashion sense to some degree

- Status

- Income

- Looks

 

I've ranked the qualities in the importance that women seem to view them in. Of course you'll get your gold diggers that view income as the number 1 trait, or the girls that will only be with Mr X because he is in a band/a rockstar (i.e status) etc.

 

All I can say is be confident in yourself, pursue your ambitions, don't take ***** from anyone, and the women will flock to you.

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Girls on this board. What are the things you look for in a guy? Good looks, great body? What makes you say woooooooooooooooooooow can't live without him.

 

It's the connection. If that's not there, then good looks and a great body are meaningless. The connection starts off with just that mutual "liking" thing. His body language says "I like you. I think you're a sweet, funny, genuine person. I also have the hots for you." And your body language says similar things back. Chemistry is when you give eachother these messages non-verbally. That's what makes it special and exciting.

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curiousnycgirl

I look for

 

Intelligence

Humour

Chemistry (can't be predicted or measured)

Someone who likes animals (and animals like him)

Like Ocean, I love masculine hands

 

Those are my biggies

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Chris Rock put it best: "What do women want? Everything."

 

If women knew what women wanted, the world would be a much simpler place. (No... men aren't innocent either...)

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I'm a dude for the record, but I learned the number one thing women want is confidence. I think the word "confidence" has been blown out of proportion, become veque, and many people are misunderstanding its real meaning.

 

If you don’t have any confidence, you cannot just force it on yourself like the flip of a light switch. you have to work on it, you have to learn how to respect yourself, love yourself, define yourself, have morals and goals, know who you are, know what you want… then confidence will eventually show itself to others.

 

there are other things girls look for in a guy, but id say confidence is #1

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Sooner or later, perhaps sometime within the next century, someone is going to realize that the word confidence is so vague as to be totally meaningless.

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Sooner or later, perhaps sometime within the next century, someone is going to realize that the word confidence is so vague as to be totally meaningless.

 

I don't think so. There's a very big different between a person who is confident and another who may not be so sure of himself, meek, withdrawn, for want of words, etc. A man with confidence has no problem walking up to a woman and starting a conversation. That's what we are speaking about here and there's nothing really vague about it...at least not to women who are looking for it.

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More wish list items:

 

- Someone with sufficient emotional strength so I can lean on him when need be and isn't afraid to ask for help when he needs it.

- Someone who doesn't need to control or be controlled. A true partner.

- Someone who will make me feel emotionally safe and protected, but who also trusts me enough that I can reciprocate when he needs it.

- Someone who wants a partner, not a mother.

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TonyT

 

I used to think the same. Until I realized I was confident as you say, and women were not interested. When it hits you what I`m saying, you will see the world completely different. The more deeply I considered what the meaning of the word confidence was, the more it became obvious, no one is really looking for confidence.

 

There are people who have this sort of confidence you speak of, and people despise them.

 

More precisely what women would likely be looking for are clones. That is about as close as I can say. It is some sort of objective fantasy that some , perhaps talented actors, have learned to mimic.

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Road Rage, no woman is looking for solely one trait. If the priority traits don't gel to what she's looking for, 10,000 gigs of confidence won't make that or those particular women become attracted.

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It's the connection. If that's not there, then good looks and a great body are meaningless. The connection starts off with just that mutual "liking" thing. His body language says "I like you. I think you're a sweet, funny, genuine person. I also have the hots for you." And your body language says similar things back. Chemistry is when you give eachother these messages non-verbally. That's what makes it special and exciting.

 

lindya, how very right you are.

 

You can meet a man that has every single desirable quality under the sun...but if the zing ain't there...well, it ain't there.

 

When we find someone with many of the desirable qualities we are looking for, chemistry can develop. But I've met guys who are, on all accounts, real hotties...the kind of guy I'd want to date...but for whatever reason, I've always found it very hard to establish *that* butterflies-in-my-stomach-go-weak-in-the-knees connection.

 

Without chemistry, there is no basis for a successful, long term relationship. I found this out the hard way. :confused:

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I'm a dude for the record, but I learned the number one thing women want is confidence. I think the word "confidence" has been blown out of proportion, become veque, and many people are misunderstanding its real meaning.

 

If you don’t have any confidence, you cannot just force it on yourself like the flip of a light switch. you have to work on it, you have to learn how to respect yourself, love yourself, define yourself, have morals and goals, know who you are, know what you want… then confidence will eventually show itself to others.

 

there are other things girls look for in a guy, but id say confidence is #1

 

Yup. How a man carries himself...how he sees himself... SO VERY IMPORTANT.

 

A man can have it all...but if he lacks confidence, well...he ceases to be a prospective mate.

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I can see why Sigmund Freud was baffled and asked what do women want. Probably every time he asked women they always said confidence and then he tried to figure out what that meant and well.... he got nowhere:laugh:

 

There is a lot of bs hiding behind that word confidence. I think when I have more time I will expose it all:cool: And women will not like me:D

 

It is not a pretty picture and probably will cause a riot:eek:

 

But, it is human nature. A flawed species, we are.

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I can see why Sigmund Freud was baffled and asked what do women want. Probably every time he asked women they always said confidence and then he tried to figure out what that meant and well.... he got nowhere:laugh:

 

There is a lot of bs hiding behind that word confidence. I think when I have more time I will expose it all:cool: And women will not like me:D

 

It is not a pretty picture and probably will cause a riot:eek:

 

But, it is human nature. A flawed species, we are.

 

And what bs would that be? What is so hard to understand? Confidence is a pretty simple, straight-forward attribute... I've met some guys who were "confused" about confidence. They were the arrogant, self-absorbed type. Funnily enough they thought they were "confident".

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There is a lot of bs hiding behind that word confidence. I think when I have more time I will expose it all:cool: And women will not like me:D
Just like the word decent.

The pretty boys tend to be decent.

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I can see why Sigmund Freud was baffled and asked what do women want. Probably every time he asked women they always said confidence and then he tried to figure out what that meant and well.... he got nowhere:laugh:

 

There is a lot of bs hiding behind that word confidence. I think when I have more time I will expose it all:cool: And women will not like me:D

 

It is not a pretty picture and probably will cause a riot:eek:

 

But, it is human nature. A flawed species, we are.

After reading this and your other posts in this thread...I have to say, you are correct, sir.

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What a woman says and what a woman does are 2 completely different things Mexican, so take their advice with a grain of salt. Don't take offense ladies, but you say you want a romantic guy, he gives you flowers, you lose interest ;). In my experience, & the experiences of others, the qualities that attract women are:

 

- Confidence

- Friendly personality

- Hygiene/Well groomed

- Style/Fashion sense to some degree

- Status

- Income

- Looks

 

I'm a girl and I don't like the romantic flowers, candles and walks on the beach or cuddling on the couch types. I also hate the mall.

 

I gotta fix that list: (I have a feeling it may change as we age. I'm old)

 

- Confidence - if you don't like you why should I?

- Friendly personality

- Hygiene/Well groomed

- Looks

- Style/Fashion sense to some degree - eh just don't look like a geek and you're probably good. I drool over a nice butt in a pair of faded levi's. (Do they even make those anymore?)

 

Scratch the last two.

 

- Status - I hate status. If you keep up with the Jones' I run far and fast. I guess some would interpret this as me not liking them because they didn't have good enough status. Whatever. I don't like you either way.

 

- Income - eh. Yeah, you need to have a job. You need to be able to pay your way when I want to go to Vegas or something. I can pay mine. It's ok if you can't afford to support two people with one salary. This isn't the 1950s. Be able to take me out to a moderately priced dinner for my b-day. I don't like over the top expensive. Unless it's a very fast car. My ex was money obsessed. That's why he's my ex. That and he bought me a minivan instead of a Viper.

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- Confidence - if you don't like you why should I?

I think this sums up the fallacy that is confidence quite well. I know quite a few people (myself included) who do in fact like themselves that are single for that reason. Compared to the other aspects women look for, confidence is far more of a supplemental trait than any of the others. If you look at some of the other traits listed, almost all of them can stand on their own (though good hygiene is universally required to make anyone tolerable). Confidence, however, needs the other listed traits plus others to be worth anything.

 

I'm of the opinion that things like style, hobbies, looks, etc rank far higher on most peoples' lists (men and women alike) than they'd care to admit. Like someone said earlier in this topic, confidence doesn't mean a thing if there's no connection between two people. If two people click well enough, they can and will feed off each other's strong traits in one way or another. Example...

 

My ex girlfriend was the stylish type, whereas I am not. She would regularly make suggestions or even buy me clothes, and I would wear them to make her happy. The fact that she is my ex, and the fact that I have regressed to my 5+ year old wardrobe shows that the connection really wasn't strong enough. This is a fairly superficial example, but that's what the start of most relationships are based on (the casual dating phase at least). We were two people who most definitely liked ourselves, but our conflicting interests made that mean next to nothing in the long run (it extended to music, hobbies, opinions, etc).

 

I really believe that everyone short of the self-loathers has confidence, but most people really don't care to look at how confident a person is simply because they don't have similar interests and tastes. Some would view the fact that I don't like to dance as a lack of confidence, but dancing is something that has never interested me from Day 1. How is not doing something that doesn't interest you a lack of confidence? I'm going to stop this train of thought as it is about to cross the fine line between confidence and stubbornness, but I think I made something of a point.

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Common interests are not personal qualities/traits in my mind, which is how I perhaps erroneously viewed the original question. I don't date a person sans having some sort of common interests. So I'd agree that it's absolute key. That and physical attraction. If I know I won't have sex with you then I'm not dating you. So call me a guy.:lmao:

 

As for confidence? I suppose everyone defines it differently. In my mind, dressing in a manner than you otherwise would simply to make a woman happy does not demonstrate confidence - yet you say you are confident. I have no reason to not believe you. But, the next time a girl tries to change something about you, f* her. Then dump her. :lmao:

 

To me, confidence basically comes down to not letting other's define your self worth. It does not = arrogance, or even assertiveness, boldness, being outgoing or any of that superficial stuff. To me personally, confidence simply means being satisfied with who you are, being able to act in a manner consistent with that self image, and not really caring (too much) what others think of you OR letting their views affect how you think, act or feel.

 

Yes, we are social by nature and generally want to be liked but there is a difference between that and letting the outer world dictate our thoughts and/or actions.

 

Women are generally fairly good at reading people. If I sense that you lack (my definition of) confidence, I will not be physically attracted to you and I don't care how good you look - as odd as that sounds probably. If I am not attracted, we will not be having sex. If we are not going to be having sex there is no point in figuring out if we have anything in common.

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Sooner or later, perhaps sometime within the next century, someone is going to realize that the word confidence is so vague as to be totally meaningless.

:lmao: sigged

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