shadowofman Posted November 7, 2007 Share Posted November 7, 2007 I agree with you Merry, and this is the reason that women are stereotyped as monogamous. I think women tend to need sapiosexual relationships, but they can be every bit as promiscuous as men, who tend to not be nearly as sapiosexual as women. So I agree with you as well pyro. Link to post Share on other sites
marlena Posted November 7, 2007 Share Posted November 7, 2007 Just put a keyboard logger on the computer, review all cell phone bills, have a private detective follow your partner after hours, go with your partner to parties, after hours business meetings, etc., go to lunch with your partner and his or her workplace everyday, watch his or here eyes as you walk through the mall, and leave someone to watch him or her when you have to go to the bathroom. What a life, uh? __________________ Tony, You're hilarious!!! Thanks for the much needed laugh on such a bad, and oh so cold day!! Link to post Share on other sites
marlena Posted November 7, 2007 Share Posted November 7, 2007 There is a ton of "cheating" going on, not just today but through all time. We see it today as cheating because of our culture. I would argue that in the recent past, cheating was even more acceptable. Men were thought to NEED a mistress at the turn of the 20th century and their wives where expected to put up with it. We have just become a more equal gender society. The result is what we call cheating. I personally believe we need to evolve past archaic notions of monogamy. Not in a male dominate way, but in an anti-possessive way. Free love and all that. Accept the fact that a large percentage of the population has an inclination toward promiscuity, figure out where you fit into that statement, and do your best to find a compatable partner. Under the current cultural environment, where "cheating" is still not fashionable, it will be hard to seperate monogamous people from people that claim to be mongamous. Great post and historically correct. In the past courtesans and concubines were an accepted state of affairs in society. Women's lib put an end to that. Today the idea of cheating is correlative to gender equality. Link to post Share on other sites
marlena Posted November 7, 2007 Share Posted November 7, 2007 To balance the sheet, however, there were once matriarchal societies. Yes, it is definitely a cultural issue. How we behave is inextricably realted to how we are conditioned to behave. Just to be clear, I am not taking a pro or con stance. Just trying to explain the phenomenon! Link to post Share on other sites
shadowofman Posted November 8, 2007 Share Posted November 8, 2007 thank you marlena And I'm not taking a pro or con stance either. Just trying to defend one "lifestyle" from being attacked by another. I happen to be a member of a particular mindset and I believe that to be my right. Different strokes. Humans have organised our relationships into countless arrangements throughout the years. Not one is better than another really as long as the individuals have a choice. In the past male domination oppressed women into conforming, or accepting the male's lifestyle. This was wrong, just as I believe it is wrong for our culture to demonize a promiscuous lifestyle. This is why I believe that odds are against relationships in our culture. People are not very free to express their interests. That being said, we are more free than we ever have been before. Link to post Share on other sites
marlena Posted November 8, 2007 Share Posted November 8, 2007 I understand what you are trying to say here Shadow. Consenting adults have the right to choose whatever lystyle they choose IMO. Whether it be a traditional marriage, an open marriage, an open relationship, no relationship or whatever other combination there may be. As long as the cards are out on the table and the terms are clear, it nobody's business. I guess the important thing here is finding a person who is of a similar mindset. It doesn't work for everybody. There can be little doubt that evidence is pointing to the demise of the traditional marriage. The divorce rate is constantly rising. Marriage is not working. This may indicate that human beings are indeed by nature polygamous beings and that vowing fidelity 'til death do us part' is not only not feasible but unatural as well. There can be no doubt that lying and cheating are the two most popular ways people respond to the restrictions that society has imposed to thwart human nature and inflict a code of morality onto its members . It is no surprise that more and more people are questioning the institution of marriage and are opting for a more open, honest approach to co - habitation. Again, I am not taking a stance but just trying to analysize the crisis at hand. Link to post Share on other sites
shadowofman Posted November 8, 2007 Share Posted November 8, 2007 Analysis of the current crisis? Well, I would say that the "current" crisis at any given period of time is a lack of understanding. Not just understanding of others, but an understanding of ourselves. Dominant men of the past century were clearly lacking an understanding of their W. And people today don't understand themselves enough to make decent choices. This has been my mission. To help people understand themselves. I think I have come to an understanding of myself in the past few years. Well see how that works out over then next few. Link to post Share on other sites
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