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A few months ago I met a girl I liked alot and, of course, I pursued her until finally we both admitted that we liked each other. I am falling madly in love with her and her me as well, or so she says. However, I still have yet to recieve even a hug. Any thoughts, insights, whatever?

 

 

Anthony

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HokeyReligions

Does she just stand there with her arms at her side when you hug her? HAVE you hugged her?

 

You say you pursued her - have you actually been dating? Have you kissed? Held hands?

 

It doesn't sound like "madly in love" to me.

 

Have you made the first move? What did she do? Have you talked to her about this? Maybe she is shy/nervous or maybe she just doesn't really feel the same about you.

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Well I guess I forgot to say...we are kinda in an awkward position. We aren't exactly friends, but then again we aren't dating. I know I am in love with her and she says the same to me. Anyways I haven't made a move yet as I can already sense that such an action could damage the relationship. Could it be that even after these few months she may not be ready?

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Make your move and accept the consequences. If she isn't receptive and gives you the brush off, she's a cheap tease. If she is receptive, you've found yourself a great love. The time is NOW!

 

Either way, you get the information you must have for your own peace of mind.

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I'm curious as to how you to have made your proclaimations of love. Am I wrong for sensing that maybe you two do a lot of communicating online?

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Alley Boo-Yes. She goes to my school. We have 2 classes together one being lunch, and we usually talk alot at lunch. Most of communication made outside of school, however, is done online. But that's not alot considering I find it boring and don't go on much.

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i've been in your girl's shoes!

 

basically, if you want to date her, you gotta start taking her out. you gotta start calling her, inviting her to places, etc.

 

if your communication is limited to lunch & IM, it's more than appropriate of her to not even hug you. heck, i'm surprised she told you she liked you.

 

go ask her out properly & then take her for dinner, or to a movie, or just for a walk. if you're not up for entertaining & getting to know her outside of school, why should she be up to hugs & such?

 

good luck,

yes

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I'd stay away from the whole "Feelings" talks that go on...online. I agree with the above post. Start doing things more in person. Go hang out at each other's house. Play video games, watch movies, or just study together. Limit your time of communicating that isn't face to face.

 

Some people use the internet as a way to say things, without being direct. That's your problem here, in my opinion. But, make sure that you use the time you'd be spending online...trying to communicate with her...just in other ways. So she doesn't think you are avoiding her or are no longer interested.

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you guys are right....but the problem is her parents won't let her date or let her talk to guys on the phone. anyways I guess things have been gettin bad between us anyways cause today I realized that I was the only one pursuing. So we kind of ended it but neither of us want it to. I'm thinking of telling her something to the effect of " whenever you feel the same as i do...you know where to find me...i'll be waiting??" is that good? I don't know, i'm really close to giving up on the relationship. Putting her and myself through this kind of heartbreak is not what I had planned. I want her to be happy, and for the most the time she is but right now she's probably really sad...and that's not what I want for her at all. Lol im rambling now. Well, thanks for the replies!

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"the relationship"? there is no relationship here...

 

btw, you shouldn't date girls who're not allowed to date. it will only cause trouble. so stay friends with her if you like, but i wouldn't pursue anything.

 

and for future reference, it's normal for the guy to pursue a woman, and the woman to not pursue him.

 

good luck,

-yes

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  • 2 weeks later...

Gees! Give up on this one it really isn't worth the effort. Study hard get your grades, get a good job, exercise stay fit and healthy - use vits and sunscreen, wait till your 30 and women will be chucking themselves at you! Trust me! It happens!

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yea.. what relationship? it sounds like all you do is talk online and you think you "love" her, when in fact if anything it's infatuation. I mean, first you're asking us why she isn't hugging you, the next you're saying your "relationship" is coming to an end.. If there hasn't been any emotional contact such as hugging/kissing/holding hands.. then... I don't see a relationship.

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  • 2 weeks later...

About talking to girls online in general, I know it can feel much easier to do but I don't reccommend it. People have confused what I've said or I've confused what they've said as being serious when it really wasn't and vice versa. Its find to talk regular conversation and stuff but I dont really reccommend talking about your perceptions of each other, as misunderstandings can occur.

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Originally posted by Jim24

About talking to girls online in general, I know it can feel much easier to do but I don't reccommend it. People have confused what I've said or I've confused what they've said as being serious when it really wasn't and vice versa. Its find to talk regular conversation and stuff but I dont really reccommend talking about your perceptions of each other, as misunderstandings can occur.

 

I agree, although I may say talking online did help prepare me for girls offline. Once a couple of years ago, I used to chat to this girl online that I liked. Except when we saw each other in person it was real awkward and it sucked. So I got rid of my instant messenger program. I'm happy and lucky that I wasn't "madly in love" with this girl, it would've been a harsh reality to deal with.

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  • 11 months later...

She's waiting for the hug. You better hug her or she's going to think you don't dig her. Or you can say "May I give you a hug?"

 

My friend in college dumped a guy 'cuz he was too slow. He didn't even try to kiss her after so many months!

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