HokeyReligions Posted April 29, 2003 Share Posted April 29, 2003 I'm just wondering - who proposed marriage or living together first in your relationship? Was it a surprise, or had you been talking about the future in a way that was obvious you would be together and the idea of marriage or living together just naturally came up? I had an accident a while back that has quite effectively erased some of my memories. I have no memory of my marriage proposal at all. My husband has told me about it - in detail, but its like a story about someone else. He told me that he actually proposed to me twice because the first time I apparently said he wasn't being sincere enough and brushed him off! I don't remember ANY of that! I'm just curious about your proposals. Link to post Share on other sites
Carly Posted April 29, 2003 Share Posted April 29, 2003 That's a good question, Hokey. Marriage proposals are not only the start of a committed reationship, they are often the start of a pattern in a committed realtionship. My husband and I met very young at university; we had both moved far way from dysfunctional homes and neither of us wanted to return. We were never the best match for each other, but our needs certainly meshed at the time. Anyway, truth be told, there never really was a formal marriage proposal between us. And I was in the driver's seat when it came to planning our future. At first I just started planning for us to live together; after awhile I started on the wedding plans. He was fairly passive about it. In retrospect, I see that this is not the best way to plan a future together. I have no problems with the woman getting the ball rolling with plans for the future, but her role should abruptly stop there. Then it is up to the man to step up to the plate, on his own, and declare his committment to planning a future together. Not that I think anyone should dwell on a flawed marriage proposal -- probabaly no couple experienced nervana when it came to planning their wedding. But I do think that sometimes you can benefit by revisting those times in order to see patterns in the realtionship that started long ago. Thanks for the memories, Hokey. Link to post Share on other sites
quankanne Posted April 29, 2003 Share Posted April 29, 2003 funny, I don't seem to recall an actual "will you marry me?" coming out of my DH's mouth either, just an "I still want to marry you" after sharing with me that he was going to renew his 2-year civil service contract in Saudi Arabia! In fact, the only marriage proposal I got was from a gay friend, who, after listening to me whining about being 24 without a marriage prospect in sight, dropped to his knees, took off his pinky ring then grabbed my hand and asked, "so, Ms. Thing, will you marry me?" we still get a laugh out of that one Link to post Share on other sites
jessicakicksbut Posted April 30, 2003 Share Posted April 30, 2003 About a month into our relationship, my boyfriend and I were having a very romantic moment, watching a sunset I do believe. I turned to him and said that I love being with him. He turns to me and says he feels the same and hopes that he is with me always. I asked him to elaborate...and he said to my request was that "he hopes that we will be together always, as man and wive someday". Since then, everytime it came up, we both elaborated more, and more, and more...etc. Now, we are "informally" engaged to be married Oct 11th of this year, the "formal" engagement he plans to make a suprise, where he will get down on his knee with a ring, when I least expect it. I think he is going to do it around our year anniversary, but is that's too predictable on his part??? We'll have to see. Link to post Share on other sites
yes Posted April 30, 2003 Share Posted April 30, 2003 awesome thread, Hokey. i'm enjoying the replies. i'm not married, but i'll share my parents' story: my dad proposed, and my mom started laughing, not able to speak, apparently because he looked so serious when he asked. After the fit of laughter, she said yes =) -yes Link to post Share on other sites
cindy0039 Posted April 30, 2003 Share Posted April 30, 2003 Six months after meeting my (now) husband he took me to dinner one night at a really nice restaurant and right before desert he started looking and acting kind of funny and then he just blurted out, "I think we should get married." I was so surprised and taken aback that I had to excuse myself to go to the restroom where I could take a few deep breaths and gather myself. All I could think was, "Oh my GOD. Did he just say what I think he said?" Since he had not even hinted about the subject, much less talked about it, I needed time to collect my thoughts before I said anything. In the end I said I would love to marry him but would like a long engagement since we hadn't known each other that long. We ended up getting married six months later - lol - so much for that long engagement huh? Well, 13 years later we're still happy so it all worked out for the best. Link to post Share on other sites
Author HokeyReligions Posted April 30, 2003 Author Share Posted April 30, 2003 I just asked one of my co-workers about her marriage proposal, and she looked at me and said "PROPOSAL!? PROPOSAL? You mean I could have said NO!?" LOL! She was joking - apparently they just decided mutually to get married and there was no actual proposal of marriage. It was just something to do that they hadn't done before. I guess it worked for them - they are celebrating their 28th anniversary! Link to post Share on other sites
Amazon22 Posted May 6, 2003 Share Posted May 6, 2003 HAVE I GOT A GOOD ONE!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA! My friend Nikki and I drove to Ft. Hood(Killeen), Texas to visit her boyfriend Randy. They had been dating for about a year and she knew that he had something up his sleeve for this particular visit! To Nikki's request I made myself disapear for an evening (Randy had one of his Army buddies take me out...hehehe...very cute). We got back at 4am to find a HUGE ROCK on Nikki's finger! And being the great friend that I am I woke her up to ask how he had proposed! Turns out that they were "getting it on" and he was "down there", now not the most romantic way to propose, but as soon as she climaxed he popped the question and slipped the ring on her finger....She laughed so hard that she let out an enormous fart right into his face! ...the wedding is this August! -Haley Link to post Share on other sites
flower Posted May 14, 2003 Share Posted May 14, 2003 Travel is our common passion. My then boyfriend now husband had booked a free and easy hotel resort package to a popular island. One evening after an Italian dinner, we went for a walk by the beach. It was then he took out a diamond ring and proposed to me, "Will you marry me?". I was elated but taken aback at the same time as I had least expected it. Thought it was just another get away trip from the stresses of city life. I opened the jewellery box and said "yes'. He smiled and put on the ring on my finger. Happiness was the word to describe that moment. We are happily married for 5 months now. Link to post Share on other sites
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