morelaugh Posted October 20, 2007 Share Posted October 20, 2007 This comparison comes from my counsellor: Young sexy porn star (or a young hot passing girl) represents a piece of luscious cake – always a temptation, very exciting, very satisfying, but something you know you can’t afford to eat every day (and you definitely wouldn’t want to live on it for a long time). On the other hand, a 40-something wife is a carrot – not so tasty and exciting (but the taste is reasonably good), you know it’s good for you and you know you could live your whole life eating it and it will only make you healthier. Even if you somehow manage to become a carrot cake, your guy will be still tempted by a chocolate cake. Do men generally feel/behave like that? And what would you rather be? Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted October 20, 2007 Share Posted October 20, 2007 I'd be a carrot cake.. LOL ... I would put all the chances on my side.. Link to post Share on other sites
Touche Posted October 20, 2007 Share Posted October 20, 2007 I'm both. I'm a carrot sometimes and carrot cake at other times. My H seems fine with that since he's never strayed. I'm not so one-dimensional that I would only be one or the other. Link to post Share on other sites
Author morelaugh Posted October 20, 2007 Author Share Posted October 20, 2007 But are you happy with the chocolate cake temptation? Link to post Share on other sites
Touche Posted October 20, 2007 Share Posted October 20, 2007 But are you happy with the chocolate cake temptation? What do you mean? I'm sometimes chocolate cake too. As for me, sure I can appreciate a good looking piece of cake but I don't have to taste it, you know? Link to post Share on other sites
johan Posted October 20, 2007 Share Posted October 20, 2007 To complete the analogy: - The carrots often get scraped off the plate into the disposal or fed to the dog under the table when no one is looking. - The cake is usually consumed in its entirety, except maybe the frosting. The frosting would be equivalent to lingerie. Speaking for myself, because I'm pretty health conscious I always eat my carrots. But because I'm single and don't have anyone around bugging me about it, I'll eat the cake first. Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted October 20, 2007 Share Posted October 20, 2007 To complete the analogy: - The carrots often get scraped off the plate into the disposal or fed to the dog under the table when no one is looking. - The cake is usually consumed in its entirety, except maybe the frosting. The frosting would be equivalent to lingerie. Speaking for myself, because I'm pretty health conscious I always eat my carrots. But because I'm single and don't have anyone around bugging me about it, I'll eat the cake first. That was good... at least you're honest... Link to post Share on other sites
johan Posted October 20, 2007 Share Posted October 20, 2007 By the way... Young sexy porn star ... to me doesn't exist. Porn stars are kind of repulsive to me. Link to post Share on other sites
Touche Posted October 20, 2007 Share Posted October 20, 2007 I don't "bug" my H to eat his carrots OR his carrot cake. He has free will to do as he pleases. And that's enough usually to please me. Link to post Share on other sites
Author morelaugh Posted October 20, 2007 Author Share Posted October 20, 2007 To complete the analogy: - The carrots often get scraped off the plate into the disposal or fed to the dog under the table when no one is looking. - The cake is usually consumed in its entirety, except maybe the frosting. The frosting would be equivalent to lingerie. Speaking for myself, because I'm pretty health conscious I always eat my carrots. But because I'm single and don't have anyone around bugging me about it, I'll eat the cake first. But even if you were not single you would want your cake, wouldn't you? Unless, someone is ‘bugging you about it”? Even than, temptation will be still there, won’t it? Link to post Share on other sites
Touche Posted October 20, 2007 Share Posted October 20, 2007 But even if you were not single you would want your cake, wouldn't you? Unless, someone is ‘bugging you about it”? Even than, temptation will be still there, won’t it? Look, there's always going to be temptation, even in the best of marriages. It's all a matter of degree and it's all a matter of how committed the couple is. It's just that simple...of course our core values come into play as well. What point are you trying to make? Link to post Share on other sites
johan Posted October 20, 2007 Share Posted October 20, 2007 I meant that someone might bug me about having the cake before the carrots. I always go for both. You two leapt to conclusions. Link to post Share on other sites
Author morelaugh Posted October 20, 2007 Author Share Posted October 20, 2007 To complete the analogy: - The carrots often get scraped off the plate into the disposal or fed to the dog under the table when no one is looking. - The cake is usually consumed in its entirety, except maybe the frosting. The frosting would be equivalent to lingerie. So true! By the way... ... to me doesn't exist. Porn stars are kind of repulsive to me. Fair enough. Hot supermarket cashier than – whatever you consider to be a cake Link to post Share on other sites
Touche Posted October 21, 2007 Share Posted October 21, 2007 Cake before carrots is fine in my book. I'm not my H's mother. Wives aren't just carrots and we're not all here to take the fun out of things. I want to please him..and if that means cake first, then cake first it shall be. Link to post Share on other sites
Author morelaugh Posted October 21, 2007 Author Share Posted October 21, 2007 What point are you trying to make? No point. I’m having trouble with accepting my H’s porn viewing and looking at other women and all that. My counsellor was trying to explain by using this analogy – like, I am a carrot and my H will always have cravings for a cake – I just have to accept that. Apparently, 40+ yo woman can never be a chocolate cake and has to be satisfied with being a carrot. Or an apple. Or something like that. Well, I’m having trouble accepting that. Why can’t I be his cake? So, I’m just trying to see what other people think. Cake before carrots is fine in my book. I'm happy with that too. I'm not just not happy with me being a carrot and him craving for a cake. Link to post Share on other sites
melodymatters Posted October 21, 2007 Share Posted October 21, 2007 Your therapist sounds like a jack ass. I am a "tasty" "exciting" 40 yr old human being, and never lack for suitors. Mostly the men I date COULD very well date 22 yr olds but choose not to as they would rather be with somone smart, interesting and on their wavelength. I suppose I could go with the food analogy ( yet another one, sigh) based on the excitement of new partners VS the familiar, but this : "On the other hand, a 40-something wife is a carrot – not so tasty and exciting (but the taste is reasonably good), " is pretty damn insulting and juvenile. Link to post Share on other sites
melodymatters Posted October 21, 2007 Share Posted October 21, 2007 I'm not just not happy with me being a carrot and him craving for a cake. Glad you agree ! Having said that, men like to look at naked woman, and that doesn't bother me, just don't call me a friggen carrott ! Link to post Share on other sites
Author morelaugh Posted October 21, 2007 Author Share Posted October 21, 2007 I think I lost the analogy for the moment. If cake before carrots means sex before duty, I’m all for it. In my analogy though it means, hot waitress before wife. It means get turned on by the cake and then ‘do it with’ with the carrot If you know what I mean. And no, I’m not fine with that. Link to post Share on other sites
Touche Posted October 21, 2007 Share Posted October 21, 2007 No point. I’m having trouble with accepting my H’s porn viewing and looking at other women and all that. My counsellor was trying to explain by using this analogy – like, I am a carrot and my H will always have cravings for a cake – I just have to accept that. Apparently, 40+ yo woman can never be a chocolate cake and has to be satisfied with being a carrot. Or an apple. Or something like that. Well, I’m having trouble accepting that. Why can’t I be his cake? So, I’m just trying to see what other people think. I'm happy with that too. I'm not just not happy with me being a carrot and him craving for a cake. Nor should you be. Are you both to him? I'm 40+ and I sure wouldn't be happy with that state of affairs (no pun intended.) Let's be honest, this probably has more to do with his character than how you are as a wife. Do you see that? What you decide to do about that, is up to you. Does your therapist say you should accept that? Link to post Share on other sites
Saxis Posted October 21, 2007 Share Posted October 21, 2007 Yeah, porn stars seem pretty trashy. They might look good, but it's the thought that "This girl would do anyone. What would make me so special?". Cake is just so one dimensional. It's tasty, but that's about it. Carrots, you can have them in the cake, or in a stew, raw, with ranch dip etc... Not only that, carrots will keep a long time in the refrigerator. Cake gets moldy after a few days... Hot supermarket cashier than – whatever you consider to be a cake Make it a hot barista and we have a deal. I respect a good looking lady that gets me coffee in the morning! Link to post Share on other sites
Touche Posted October 21, 2007 Share Posted October 21, 2007 Yeah, porn stars seem pretty trashy. They might look good, but it's the thought that "This girl would do anyone. What would make me so special?". Cake is just so one dimensional. It's tasty, but that's about it. Carrots, you can have them in the cake, or in a stew, raw, with ranch dip etc... Not only that, carrots will keep a long time in the refrigerator. Cake gets moldy after a few days... Make it a hot barista and we have a deal. I respect a good looking lady that gets me coffee in the morning! Absolutely brilliant Saxis! And thanks for the laughs! Very, very good. Link to post Share on other sites
Author morelaugh Posted October 21, 2007 Author Share Posted October 21, 2007 Does your therapist say you should accept that? Yes. According to him every woman who’s come to a certain age, has to deal (and accept) that at some point. The sooner the better. Otherwise, she is fighting against the nature, as men will always (more or less secretly) desire younger women. Link to post Share on other sites
johan Posted October 21, 2007 Share Posted October 21, 2007 Cake is just so one dimensional. It's tasty, but that's about it. Carrots, you can have them in the cake, or in a stew, raw, with ranch dip etc... You've never had cake stew?? Link to post Share on other sites
Touche Posted October 21, 2007 Share Posted October 21, 2007 Yes. According to him every woman who’s come to a certain age, has to deal (and accept) that at some point. The sooner the better. Otherwise, she is fighting against the nature, as men will always (more or less secretly) desire younger women. Wow, wow, just wow. Mel is right. You need a new therapist. That's just downright wrong and irresponsible on his/her part to say such a thing. I can't believe it. Yet again, this confirms how that community is more f'ed up than anyone (shrinks, therapists, et. al.) Please get someone else. That's just bull plain and simple and you're smart enough to know better. I can tell. Link to post Share on other sites
johan Posted October 21, 2007 Share Posted October 21, 2007 Absolutely brilliant Saxis! Brilliant? Yes. Absolutely? I don't think so. Absolute brilliance is probably impossible for a human to achieve. Relative brilliance (of which I think Saxis' post is an example) occurs pretty often, although a lot less often than absolute stupidity, which humans do seem capable of. Link to post Share on other sites
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