summergirl Posted October 21, 2007 Share Posted October 21, 2007 I am FWB with my roommate. We like each other and got a strong chemistry. But recently he and my other roommate have been hanging out a lot with these 2 girls in their apartment (same apartment but different building). My other roommate is going out with one of the girls. And I think the other girl kinda likes my FWB. And they often drink at the girls' apartment, passed out or too tired to walk home, and spend a night there, they get back home in the next morning. When I ask him about it he always says that he only friends with the girl. He said he didn't like her at all, he never did anything to her, she's 30 pounds heavier than his type, he dislikes chubby girls, etc. I believe that... BUT, when he gets drunk, do you think something could happen beyond his control? Could he see her in a different way when he's not sober? I pay enough attention to him, and he takes good care of me too. And I dont wanna put more attention to him that's gonna make me look needy/clingy just because there's other girl. But the thoughts of him spending time with another girl is driving me nuts and paranoid. I wanna know from guys' perspective, how do you see things when you drunk? Link to post Share on other sites
Saxis Posted October 21, 2007 Share Posted October 21, 2007 If you're only FWB, what difference would it make how he sees her? Sounds like you've moved beyond the FWB arrangement, and should probably talk to him about that. As far as being drunk, I don't think it gives me any different perspective on people. Lowers inhibitions maybe... If he doesn't find her attractive sober, he probably won't drunk either. The question is whether he finds her attractive enough to sleep with her. Link to post Share on other sites
Curmudgeon Posted October 21, 2007 Share Posted October 21, 2007 That's decidedly more than FWB. That's possessive. I think you need to redefine your relationship with him. You might want to let him in on it too! Link to post Share on other sites
blowingthetrout Posted October 21, 2007 Share Posted October 21, 2007 I see everyone as bangable Link to post Share on other sites
norajane Posted October 21, 2007 Share Posted October 21, 2007 When I ask him about it he always says that he only friends with the girl. He said he didn't like her at all, How can he be 'friends' with her if he doesn't like her? Or do you mean he's friends with her, but not interested in her? I don't know - that sounds like he's not being totally honest. Guys don't usually hang out with girls that much if they don't like them at least a little. And you, clearly, are way into your roommate, as much more than FWB. Why can't you tell him? Why are you FWB's and not bf/gf? Link to post Share on other sites
Author summergirl Posted October 22, 2007 Author Share Posted October 22, 2007 I can't have a bf/gf relatioship with him because: he's way too young for me, we dont share many things in common, he doesn't wanna get married, he's a bad communicator, he still have things going on with his ex, and no matter how much i try we cant really emotionally attached. But the sex is so good. At the first months we know each other, he told me all the time that he was really into me, he felt that he liked me more than i liked him. He texted me very often everyday to say he misses me or just to say hi. But I just cant get any more closer to him, he admitted that he's been having problems to let someone in, he couldn't trust anyone. So I dont wanna force a relationship with him. But we do take care of each other. So now since he's been hanging out a lot lately with this girl even though he said he's not interested in her at all, I began to think to stop this fwb thing, but it's gonna be so hard for me because I really enjoy the sex and we live together and the chemistry between us is so strong. He comes to my room to kiss me good morning everyday, we talk all the time in IM when he's at work. Is there such thing as an exclusive fwb? I think that's what we need. I'm kinda miss the time when he was really into me, so I dont know if it's because I'm afraid to lose that feeling or if I do really like him. What's the best way to talk to him to redifine our relationship? He seem to keep his distant if I talk about this thing. Link to post Share on other sites
Sunblast Posted November 5, 2007 Share Posted November 5, 2007 Babe, summergirl, listen -- who are you asking? You have a perfectly normal, healthy arrangement with your roommate, and you have some normal **** happening (other people in the picture) and you are a little upset (which is absolutely normal). So you have a perfectly normal, okay situation. Sure, you may want some advice. But don't ask it on Love Shack! ! ! If you were one of those losers asking like "a girl look at me, what does it mean?" then yeah, you are hopeless and by all means, go ask **** on LS. BUT!!! If you are NORMAL, like you are, summergirl, then don't ask **** on LS because the guys who asked "a girl looked at me, what does it mean" are gonna be the ones answering you! You'd never take advice from a loser in real life... ever!... why talk to the same loser who registered on LS and ask for his advice here? You should talk to your girlfriends in real life and ask them, or make your own decision, which would be best for you. Link to post Share on other sites
Phateless Posted November 6, 2007 Share Posted November 6, 2007 SummerGirl - you need to just suck it up and face the facts... YOU LIKE HIM AND YOU WANT MORE. Until you can admit to yourself, there's no solution. Link to post Share on other sites
brothermartin Posted November 6, 2007 Share Posted November 6, 2007 Babe, summergirl, listen -- who are you asking? You have a perfectly normal, healthy arrangement with your roommate, and you have some normal **** happening (other people in the picture) and you are a little upset (which is absolutely normal). So you have a perfectly normal, okay situation. Sure, you may want some advice. But don't ask it on Love Shack! ! ! If you were one of those losers asking like "a girl look at me, what does it mean?" then yeah, you are hopeless and by all means, go ask **** on LS. BUT!!! If you are NORMAL, like you are, summergirl, then don't ask **** on LS because the guys who asked "a girl looked at me, what does it mean" are gonna be the ones answering you! You'd never take advice from a loser in real life... ever!... why talk to the same loser who registered on LS and ask for his advice here? You should talk to your girlfriends in real life and ask them, or make your own decision, which would be best for you. Once I stop laughing, I might be offended:lmao: But seriously, if hes just a FWB to you, why do you care what or who he might be doing when he's drunk? Maybe you should consider getting a new FWB or ask yourself why you care. Link to post Share on other sites
Phateless Posted November 6, 2007 Share Posted November 6, 2007 If you don't want a relationship... you can't make relationship claims on him. Link to post Share on other sites
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