Modey3 Posted May 5, 2003 Share Posted May 5, 2003 Here is the situation. I've been dating this girl for a few months. I'm 24 and she is 23. We were having sex within one month of dating, and started labeling each other as boyfriend/girlfriend. The problem was that neither of us had the time for a serious commitment. I'm still in college finishing up this month (finally) and she works crazy hours. The only time we got to see each other was on Saturday. It wasn't enough time for me and I was having a problem with it. So I told her and we decided to continue seeing each other but on a non-commited basis and we were allowed to see other people. And last night we ended up having sex even though we techically arn't committed. I mean I really like this girl, she is really amazing, but I was wondering if anybody had simliar experiences in this situation. I would love to be in a committed relationship with her again. I do plan on seeing other people, and it may be helpful in reinforcing my feelings for her. I guess I'm just really taken by her. Anyways what are some experiences on this issue ? Modey3 Link to post Share on other sites
Bill Posted May 5, 2003 Share Posted May 5, 2003 I can't see how people can sleep with someone they don't love. I just need the mental side of it. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted May 5, 2003 Share Posted May 5, 2003 FIRST YOU WRITE: " I'm still in college finishing up this month (finally) and she works crazy hours. The only time we got to see each other was on Saturday. It wasn't enough time for me and I was having a problem with it. So I told her and we decided to continue seeing each other but on a non-commited basis and we were allowed to see other people." THEN YOU WRITE: "I would love to be in a committed relationship with her again. I do plan on seeing other people, and it may be helpful in reinforcing my feelings for her. I guess I'm just really taken by her." What a great way of showing your love for her...by ending the committed part of the relationship so you can see other people to help you reinforce your feelings for her. Wow, what a concept...easing off with someone you really care about because your schedules ONLY permit you to see one another on Saturdays!!! I'd have never thought of that myself. You're tons smarter than I am!!! I have no experience with something like this in my life because not in my wildest dreams would I have thought of this novel way of conducting a relationship with someone I loved. Now I can start eating ice cream, Twinkies, and cookies to reinforce my committment to my strict weight loss diet. You're an absolute genius!!! Link to post Share on other sites
yes Posted May 5, 2003 Share Posted May 5, 2003 HAVE you ever slept with somebody you didn't love? You gotta try before you say something about it, ya know. -yes Link to post Share on other sites
EnigmaXOXO Posted May 5, 2003 Share Posted May 5, 2003 I was wondering if anybody had similar experiences in this situation Nope. Sorry to disappoint you, but I have never been one to have causal sex with one or more partners at the same time. While I may not have been madly "in love" with the person I was intimate with at the time, there was certainly expectations (on both sides) that the relationship was moving in that direction. Perhaps it is because I am female, or my own phobias regarding sexually transmitted diseases, but I have always been involved in "exclusive" relationships with the partners I was sexually active with. And because of my own self respect, I would never allow that to happen between myself and my partner unless there was a mutual understanding that the relationship (sexual or otherwise) was an exclusive one. ...Guess I'm just old fashioned. Link to post Share on other sites
Bill Posted May 5, 2003 Share Posted May 5, 2003 HAVE you ever slept with somebody you didn't love? You gotta try before you say something about it, ya know. I would NOT sleep with someone I didn't love. Maybe it's ok for you, but not me. I'm against suicide too. Do I have to try suicide before I say something about it too? Link to post Share on other sites
yes Posted May 5, 2003 Share Posted May 5, 2003 OK, lemme re-phrase - Don't put people down for something you haven't done, just because you're against it. You may have not been trying to put the guy down in your post, but that's how it sounded to me. -yes Link to post Share on other sites
jessicakicksbut Posted May 5, 2003 Share Posted May 5, 2003 Bill and Enigma on this one, I don't see how someone can sleep with someone you do not love...guess I am just old-fashioned too. I think casual sex just cheapens a person, and their perception on life. Link to post Share on other sites
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