Beginning something Bad

[alwayswandering]

My highschool whatever you want to call it, just got married. The sad thing is, as soon as I write this, I know what Everyone will say but I'm going to post this anyway.

 

My Ex and I have always had a strange relationship. Unhealthy I'm sure. Competitive, Complicated...but equally hot and satisfying. In high school we never had sex. I was super "married to Jesus" and refusing to give it up. So all our afternoons consisted of us making out every day in the gym after school so hard until neither of us could stand it anymore and then going home all hot bothered and frustrated. Senior year of highschool I don't know what happened to him but he turned into a different person and got uptight and arrogant and snappy and unpredictable. He was convinced he was God's gift to our humble class of only seven people (including myself...that's private school for you). We broke-up needless to say, I don't do well with arrogance. He went away to the Air Force academy in Colorado (we're from California) and met a girl...We tried to stay friends but on one of his visits here we ended up meeting up to "talk"and ended up having another one of our crazy make-out sessions. After that he refused to talk to me and blew me off. ANd the next thing I heard He was getting all serious with this new girl. Well it ended with that girl and my ex came crying to me, not to get back with me, just to complain about how horrible she was for breaking his heart..He was surprised to learn that I, his goody goody virgin, was no longer goody goody virgin and I was super in love with someone and in in a very serious relationship and was considering marriage. he acted jealous but congratulated me anyway. Now 3 years later, my serious relationship has come to a screeching hault and Im newly single and seeking conformation I'm sure. I found out that in only about a year's time, my ex had met, proposed to, and MARRIED someone in Colorado, dropped out of school and supposedly has this job that he's all obsessed with. I was even more surprised to hear that he "still has feelings for me" and desperately wants to meet up so we can do 'what we never got to do'...Weve been talking and texting and I feel so awful because he's only been married two months, his blushing bride is young, just turned 20 and I'm sure she's thinking that everything's wonderful, while in reality her husband is texting me at seven in the morning asking me to send him pictures to give him a preview of what we'll soon be doing...Apparently he has a bunch of trips to "come see his family" lined up...I'm so torn because I feel like he slipped through my fingers and everything happened so fast...OUr lust for each other is off the charts and I KNOW it shouldn't be, but just the sound of his voice sends me into a frenzy and all I have to do is send him one text to have him blowing up my phone for the rest of the week. Id love to say that if and when he comes back here to visit I would be the bigger person and not pick up my phone and not give in, but I don't believe I have the strength. I know we can't be together and I don't want to be with him, I just want us to have our time together. We grew up together and I'm finding it very difficult to just let the whole thing drop. Its not hindering me from seeing other people, I just want him in the way I want him and I feel that if the opportunity presents itself and Im sure the opportunity is coming soon, Ill give into it. Okay...I'm sure I will get a lot of criticism so.....bring it...I'm ready.

[Princess112]

Please don't get involved with him. I'm sure if you had gotten married, finding out your husband is having an affair with his ex girlfriend will make you devasted. Please place yourself in her shoes.

 

If you feel horny then finish yourself off. I know it doesn't work the same way for a woman as it would to a guy who can just jack off and that's it, but it releases SOME of the sexual tension.

 

The only reason why being with him looks so exciting is because you never got to do it before, and he's something you shouldn't get to, which makes you want him even more. But please please please, don't get involved with him.

 

It isn't worth it. You will become the other woman, you will become vulnerable, you will expect more from him, and when he doesn't give you more, you will become frusturated and hurt. Don't do this to yourself or his bride. He is scum. And if he wants to cheat on HER, he will cheat on YOU. Also, what about STD's? Who knows how many "trips" he has in Colorado and how many women he's been with.

 

Please. Learn control.