devastatedagain Posted November 3, 2007 Share Posted November 3, 2007 Hi Everyone - Maybe this question doesn't really have a good answer, but how is it that so many people can end a relationship and then jump right into a new one so quickly? It is one thing in short-term relationships, but it blows my mind in situations of long-term relationships and marriages. Just as an example, in my scenario - separated and divorced 8 months ago and she is now on her second relationship since the breakup, telling the new guy how much she loves him after dating for two weeks. Maybe I'm wrong, but last I checked, love doesn't develop in two weeks. Is it that some people are trying to fill a void? Did they never really care in the first place? Link to post Share on other sites
norajane Posted November 3, 2007 Share Posted November 3, 2007 1. Many people detach themselves from relationships long before they actually end them. So they're already at the point where they don't have feelings for their partner anymore by the time they break up or file for divorce. The partner who is dumped, on the other hand, is usually only beginning the process, so it is unfathomable how their lover could move on right away - but they moved on a long time ago. 2. And just as many people throw the word 'love' around when it's no such thing. Love develops over time. Everything else - infatuation, lust, 'in love', yeah, that can be quick...but it's not love. Link to post Share on other sites
Author devastatedagain Posted November 3, 2007 Author Share Posted November 3, 2007 Great points Nora Link to post Share on other sites
norajane Posted November 3, 2007 Share Posted November 3, 2007 Great points Nora It still sucks, though. I'm sorry you're hurting. Link to post Share on other sites
Author devastatedagain Posted November 3, 2007 Author Share Posted November 3, 2007 I am still hurting to a degree, but it is getting better - The hurt is starting to turn to anger toward her, which I am not sure if that is a good or bad thing, but damn has it upped my number of weightlifting reps! Maybe we all eventually come to this point; I certainly hope so for all of the hurting souls on these boards, but I am starting to see her for what she is. She doesn't know what she wants, she jumps on board and is "in love" with anyone that shows her an ounce of attention, and she is always on the lookout for the "next best thing." These aren't exactly endearing behaviors in the scope of a long-term relationship. I always had trouble trusting her throughout our relationship and my insecurities have been further reiterated over the past 8 months; essentially, she is a loose cannon and will jet as soon as something better comes along. Not really the type of person that I want to associate with. Link to post Share on other sites
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