Pissed off at ex MM and feeling spiteful.. do i dare?

[Love is Tragic]

So ive been NC with exMM for over 5 months now, and trying to move on. Never really got any closure over the whole EA/PA and have been attempting to deal with it. I havent called him, emailed him, or contacted him in any way, and neither has he. Although i cant stop thinking about him, even though i know i said i was over this whole drama. I was bored and cruising myspace profiles the other day and lo and behold, ExMM now has a myspace profile! (when we were together, he wanted to create a profile but his wife threw a fit and wouldnt allow it.) It seems that he has had it for less than a month.

 

After deliberating for several days, (and i know i shouldnt have given it any thought), i wrote him a somewhat sarcastic message of, "remember me?". In my fantasy dream-land state, i thought he would reply to my message explaining why the no closure and other appropriate sentiments, but instead, he set it to where only his myspace friends could send him a message. Wow.. nice huh? In a way it made me see what a coward and a heartless bastard he is, but its so hard to comprehend after the great times we had together, and everything we said to one another.

 

So im feeling especially spiteful-im sure hes counting on me to remain quiet, to not tell the wife everything.(she supposedly knows he committed some kind of unfaithful wrong-doing, but no details, and doesnt know it was me he was involved with.) I sooooooo want to spill the beans, although i know it will lead to repurcussions for myself. I know i should put him out of my mind, but easier said than done. What do you think?

[imstunned]

Hey there - I didnt know your story and have spent a little time reading through some of your old posts - and though your situation is different I saw may own words in some of your posts.

 

I too have been feeling like getting revenge - telling the wife everything (I lied to her, gave him a second chance). The last contact I had with my scumbag ex MM was a week ago. Texts prompted by me after 3 weeks NC after his wife phoned me. He took the opportunity to tell me they were making a go of things. I doubt he would have contacted me to tell me himself - he is the hugest coward.

 

Thing is - if you do anything, all it really shows is that you still give a sh*t. Thats why I havent. He will lie his way out of anything you say. His wife will think you are a psycho. And Ex MM will just feel smug that you still care after all this time. Well - this is what I tell myself anyway when i talk myself out of getting revenge.

 

Some body said to me on one of my posts that the best revenge is moving on. I couldnt see that at the time. But I think its true. Its very very hard, and I;m having a daily struggle. But I will not let my exMM have the satisfaction of knowing he is even on my mind long enough to carry out any act of revenge.

 

The last thing I want to do is sound harsh - but dont you think that after 5 months that he has really moved on and isnt really thinking of you at all rather than counting on you to stay quiet?

 

Stay strong - and dont do anything. It will open up old wounds and hurt you more in the long run.

 

Just my opinion. You have done well for 5 months!! Keep going! x

[lost4ever]

It sucks, but let it go....just keep on trying to move on

[whichwayisup]

The last thing I want to do is sound harsh - but dont you think that after 5 months that he has really moved on and isnt really thinking of you at all rather than counting on you to stay quiet?

 

I agree. You're assuming that he is in the same frame of mind as you are, not having closure, thinking of you daily, missing you...Even if he is, he hasn't contacted you and that says alot so don't cave and contact him, even for revenge. It isn't worth your heartache you'll feel later.

 

he set it to where only his myspace friends could send him a message. Wow.. nice huh? In a way it made me see what a coward and a heartless bastard he is, but its so hard to comprehend after the great times we had together, and everything we said to one another.

 

Many people do this, so again, don't assume you are the reason why he's set up his account that way.

 

Somehow you need to make peace with this and make your own closure.

[Tomcat33]

I would say don't bother, he has gone out of his way to maintain no contact with you which means all this time he has been working on trying to convince his w he is a good little ol'husband. She has no idea he was cheating on her with another woman and during the time chaces are he was removed and absent from her. Now that you are out of the pic he is prob working very hard to play the good H again, so for you to come out of the blue and try to blow his cover to his W it will be your word, a complete and utter stranger, against his. He will go out of his way to convince her otherwise and you will end up looking the "nutcase" in the end.

 

If he was coming after you I'd say you would have a better chance at confronting her if you had a good reason to do so but like this I don't think it's worth your time and energy.

 

He'll get what's coming to him, they always do. TRUST me on this.

[KATANYA]

So im feeling especially spiteful-im sure hes counting on me to remain quiet, to not tell the wife everything.(she supposedly knows he committed some kind of unfaithful wrong-doing, but no details, and doesnt know it was me he was involved with.) I sooooooo want to spill the beans, although i know it will lead to repurcussions for myself. I know i should put him out of my mind, but easier said than done. What do you think?

 

 

For the very reasons you mention above, you SHOULD NOT tell his W. You are doing it for spite; you are doing it to hurt MM because he hurt you and you already stated W knows 'something' happened and he's still with her so apparently she's dealing with that and still plans to stay in the M. Telling W will not put MM out of your mind or out of his M- it will draw him further back into your thoughts because you will start analysing your conversation with W, anticipating what MM's reactions will be; expecting to hear from MM, etc. etc.

 

As hard as it is, let it go. If MM is that gutless that he gave you no reasons or no closure; and if he is that adament about not contacting you that he blocks his profile so that you cannot contact him, then take pleasure in the fact that you are obviously either a threat to him or a temptation to him but, above all else, you are someone who he will NEVER get a chance to hurt again!

[imstunned]

He'll get what's coming to him, they always do. TRUST me on this.

 

Can you tell me that too tomcat?? My ex MM is a complete A**HOLE!!

 

x

[Tomcat33]

Can you tell me that too tomcat?? My ex MM is a complete A**HOLE!!

 

x

 

 

Oh Imstunned this goes ESPECIALLY for your exguy if he is a no good peice of sht he will get was is coming to him. You see mean selfish people only get so far in life and then what's coming to them comes in bucketfulls. Take solice in knowing that someone who is percieved as an "*********" is going though life in a miserable existence. They are unhappy within so no matter what happens around them that can be perceived as good, is futile because the misery comes within. They cannot escape themselves. That is sentence enough.

 

I know it sounds like nonsense words to make you feel better but it's not.

Life really does work like that. I beleive that at least.

[Love is Tragic]

Thanks for the advice everyone-i know that i shouldnt be a b*tch about the situation,and i have played it completely cool until now but i just couldnt help myself. You could be completely right and he may not be thinking about me at all. I do think its possible that he just told me that the wife knows just so i wont contact her, and that he also thinks i wont because it will lead to consequences within my own marriage. I hate the way that men think sometimes, that I will be the nutcase, even though i have NOT contacted him in the least, all this time. And he has to know he doesnt deserve to be treated with respect from me.

 

All i wanted from him was closure-when together, i always told him if he wanted to end it he was of course free to do so, as long as he did it in a respectful manner, which he promised he would. All obviously bullcrap. I wish there really was a machine that could erase all these memories away, like in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. How great would that be??

What really cracks me up is that his myspace headline is, " What goes around comes around!!". I really hope he gets his in the end. That smug bastard..

[imstunned]

Oh Imstunned this goes ESPECIALLY for your exguy if he is a no good peice of sht he will get was is coming to him. They cannot escape themselves. That is sentence enough.

 

I know it sounds like nonsense words to make you feel better but it's not.

Life really does work like that. I beleive that at least.

 

I will be saying that as a mantra for a while. Thanks

 

Love is tragic - cowards dont do respect very well. Thats all he is - just a coward. Did you say in another post that you did speak to him after 2 months? Perhaps that was his way of ending it respectfully. It seems to be that some men would rather chew off their own arm than be blunt - so they soften things, and we as women read between the lines. I do it everyday. In my last text exchange with my exmm he didnt say goodbye. I did. He said "Take care" I keep on thinking - I wonder if he didnt mean goodbye - he never said goodbye. Sorry - rambling a bit about my own garbage again, I can just relate.

 

Hang in there. You are doing great. Try writing out angry letters to ex MM for cathartic reasons. I did that and it helped. Also - when ever I catch myself thinking he was a nice guy - I try to imagine his face is a mask. Take it off and Underneath is teaming with maggots. That helps too!

[whichwayisup]

I do think its possible that he just told me that the wife knows just so i wont contact her, and that he also thinks i wont because it will lead to consequences within my own marriage.

 

Because of this, that's another reason to stay away from him. IF by chance he has told his wife, and they've worked together to make their marriage better, last thing you need to deal with is HIS wife calling your husband and telling him you're contacting exMM.

 

Someone said it here already, best revenge is to not look back and live your life. Focus on your husband and kids, (if you have any) and let the exMM go completely.

[Love is Tragic]

I will be saying that as a mantra for a while. Thanks

 

Love is tragic - cowards dont do respect very well. Thats all he is - just a coward. Did you say in another post that you did speak to him after 2 months? Perhaps that was his way of ending it respectfully. It seems to be that some men would rather chew off their own arm than be blunt - so they soften things, and we as women read between the lines. I do it everyday. In my last text exchange with my exmm he didnt say goodbye. I did. He said "Take care" I keep on thinking - I wonder if he didnt mean goodbye - he never said goodbye. Sorry - rambling a bit about my own garbage again, I can just relate.

 

Hang in there. You are doing great. Try writing out angry letters to ex MM for cathartic reasons. I did that and it helped. Also - when ever I catch myself thinking he was a nice guy - I try to imagine his face is a mask. Take it off and Underneath is teaming with maggots. That helps too!

 

Great advice, thank you! Our last physical contact was in April, then there was NC for 2 months, as he called in June. We used to talk everyday for hours at a time sometimes, and then Poof! nothing.. We had two conversations, the first one in June, and the second one about a week and a half after the first. The first were his apologies and "explanation" for the NC. The second conversation was just generally awkward, and i just didnt know what to say. It was like i had waited all that time to talk to him and then i froze, there were so many things i had wanted to say and couldnt.

[Tomcat33]

Thanks for the advice everyone-i know that i shouldnt be a b*tch about the situation,and i have played it completely cool until now but i just couldnt help myself. You could be completely right and he may not be thinking about me at all. I do think its possible that he just told me that the wife knows just so i wont contact her, and that he also thinks i wont because it will lead to consequences within my own marriage. I hate the way that men think sometimes, that I will be the nutcase, even though i have NOT contacted him in the least, all this time. And he has to know he doesnt deserve to be treated with respect from me.

 

All i wanted from him was closure-when together, i always told him if he wanted to end it he was of course free to do so, as long as he did it in a respectful manner, which he promised he would. All obviously bullcrap. I wish there really was a machine that could erase all these memories away, like in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. How great would that be??

What really cracks me up is that his myspace headline is, " What goes around comes around!!". I really hope he gets his in the end. That smug bastard..

 

Is he a smug bastard or is he already living some of the reprecutions of his own doings? We are so quick to think the worst in our favour in these types of situations or when a rel fails, and little do we know that sometimes the other side is feeling bad too. Even if they so called "wanted it that way" they could be living in their own hell.

 

He has to go back to his life and face the music and supress everything that they had with you. Surely you can understand that you must have to be doing some of the same to face your own reality. I still think the people that have it better off when an A ends are the single people, people who have to go back to face another relationship have SO MUCH more to have to deal with. They have to deal with the ending of one relationship and all the inevitable feelings of a breakup and also have to focus on reviving an old stale rel. my goodness if that is not sentence enough I don't know what is.

 

I remember at my lowest points I was festering in my own stew of pain and it sucked but maaaan to have to face a spouse who you are not sure what you feel for on top of that, I don't know how people get through that!?!? These guys that try to pick up where they left off when they end an A have so many unresolved emotions they supress that they have to carry inside like a big heavy bag of lead. Half of them don't even have a clue as to why the cheated and chances are they think they can live in silence of their error and sooner or later it is either going to come back to face them again or they will commit the same mistake again because they resolve SHT by running away from all their problems and it's like Imstunned said and I so agree wtih this, some guys would rather chew off their own arm than to have to face terminating something in an adult manner. It just doesn't happen. Heck it doesn't happen in a lot of normal rels let alone and A.

 

 

I can't imagine going though life like that. Having to put on a happy, "I am here now" face infront of their Ws the very same women they loved to unlove until the A ended.

I'm sorry but that has got to be the worst punishment someone can bring on to themselves.

 

So when you are so quick to think of the ways to get back, think of it this way: it wouldn't even BE revenge it would be like taking advantage of someone who is crippled. They are so messed inside that getting revenge on them wouldn't even be satisfactory, they are at their lowest anything on top of that is wasted energy on your part.

 

Of course they put on the happy face and make it seem like they are fine and coping but they are rotting inside.

 

How do I know this? i have been privied to my ex's insights into his emotions since we broke up he feels the need to periodically remind me of just how crap his life really is. I suppose I could block his emails if I really wanted to but in all honesty it gives me some pleasure to know that he is festering in his own actions. I don't even hate him anymore I really really feel sorry for him. Sometimes I worry he is even going to do something stupid but what can you do, we are all grown ups if you are a coward who lives for other people's expectations then expect to have your life slip you by.

[outofdarkness]

So ive been NC with exMM for over 5 months now, and trying to move on. Never really got any closure over the whole EA/PA and have been attempting to deal with it. I havent called him, emailed him, or contacted him in any way, and neither has he. Although i cant stop thinking about him, even though i know i said i was over this whole drama. I was bored and cruising myspace profiles the other day and lo and behold, ExMM now has a myspace profile! (when we were together, he wanted to create a profile but his wife threw a fit and wouldnt allow it.) It seems that he has had it for less than a month.

 

After deliberating for several days, (and i know i shouldnt have given it any thought), i wrote him a somewhat sarcastic message of, "remember me?". In my fantasy dream-land state, i thought he would reply to my message explaining why the no closure and other appropriate sentiments, but instead, he set it to where only his myspace friends could send him a message. Wow.. nice huh? In a way it made me see what a coward and a heartless bastard he is, but its so hard to comprehend after the great times we had together, and everything we said to one another.

 

So im feeling especially spiteful-im sure hes counting on me to remain quiet, to not tell the wife everything.(she supposedly knows he committed some kind of unfaithful wrong-doing, but no details, and doesnt know it was me he was involved with.) I sooooooo want to spill the beans, although i know it will lead to repurcussions for myself. I know i should put him out of my mind, but easier said than done. What do you think?

If you want to get back at him...Find happiness YOURSELF..Show him what a coward and a bastard he is by showing him that you are happier and more self fulfilled without him. Believe me..Getting back at him by "spilling the beans" to his W and family really doesn't hurt him..It hurts family..I can see from post that you have no interest in hurting them..Only HIM...Read some of the LS posts from OW who HAVE tried to get back at the MM though the W and kids. It's a mess and always ends up very sad. Good luck! ood

[OWoman]

If you want to get back at him...Find happiness YOURSELF..Show him what a coward and a bastard he is by showing him that you are happier and more self fulfilled without him. Believe me..

 

... and then advertise it on a MySpace page for him to find!

 

Getting back at him by "spilling the beans" to his W and family really doesn't hurt him..It hurts family..I can see from post that you have no interest in hurting them..Only HIM...Read some of the LS posts from OW who HAVE tried to get back at the MM though the W and kids. It's a mess and always ends up very sad. Good luck! ood

 

Agreed - I don't see how you can contain the risk so that the fall-out from that hits only him, and not others. That may be "collateral damage" you're prepared to risk, but your posts don't show any ill will towards them so I'm assuming that's not your intention.

 

If you're wanting revenge, there are whole websites dedicated to that kind of thing. If you're just angry, and wanting to work through that, then take the advice others are given and achieve your own happiness. That way you gain in the process, rather than compromising yourself and ending up with a hollow victory.

[forbidden fruit]

If you want to get back at him...Find happiness YOURSELF..Show him what a coward and a bastard he is by showing him that you are happier and more self fulfilled without him. Believe me..Getting back at him by "spilling the beans" to his W and family really doesn't hurt him..It hurts family..I can see from post that you have no interest in hurting them..Only HIM...Read some of the LS posts from OW who HAVE tried to get back at the MM though the W and kids. It's a mess and always ends up very sad. Good luck! ood

 

Take it from me about two months ago i was ready to tell his W everything. Ruin my M, ruin my kids an his kids and his W not to mention everybody else all for a guy who does not give a sh*** about any of us and only cares about himself.

 

So why give him the satisfication because in the end he has to deal with himself and what he has done. Let him face his own demons. Right now I am getting the best satisifaction without having to hurt anyone. He has to see me everyday doing great in my business, having a great life with healthy children and a great husband and it is killing him.

 

Afterall that is what made me so attractive to him in the first place. He was jealous of what I had and wanted it. Well you should get solace in knowing he will never have you and he did that by his own choice-albeit a stupid choice. Let him suffer forever in his decision and indecision. He will never be happy, but you must chose to be happy and telling his W will not make you happy. I thought it would, but this revenge is so much sweeter. better than I thought possible. Just give it time.

[imstunned]

I'm reading this thread over and over - I have woken up today feeling very bitter and in need of revenge. Tomcats words give me some comfort - but I think that my exmm really is the lowest of the low and wont be thinking of me at all!! hence my need for revenge - I feel like blowing his life apart. I'll keep reading - hell - even taking my own advice - until the need passes.

 

Hopefully your need for revenge will pass too. Just get a really hot picture of you up on your my space account - just so that if he does a search for you you look great! AND HAPPY!

 

x

[Meaplus3]

So ive been NC with exMM for over 5 months now, and trying to move on. Never really got any closure over the whole EA/PA and have been attempting to deal with it. I havent called him, emailed him, or contacted him in any way, and neither has he. Although i cant stop thinking about him, even though i know i said i was over this whole drama. I was bored and cruising myspace profiles the other day and lo and behold, ExMM now has a myspace profile! (when we were together, he wanted to create a profile but his wife threw a fit and wouldnt allow it.) It seems that he has had it for less than a month.

 

After deliberating for several days, (and i know i shouldnt have given it any thought), i wrote him a somewhat sarcastic message of, "remember me?". In my fantasy dream-land state, i thought he would reply to my message explaining why the no closure and other appropriate sentiments, but instead, he set it to where only his myspace friends could send him a message. Wow.. nice huh? In a way it made me see what a coward and a heartless bastard he is, but its so hard to comprehend after the great times we had together, and everything we said to one another.

 

So im feeling especially spiteful-im sure hes counting on me to remain quiet, to not tell the wife everything.(she supposedly knows he committed some kind of unfaithful wrong-doing, but no details, and doesnt know it was me he was involved with.) I sooooooo want to spill the beans, although i know it will lead to repurcussions for myself. I know i should put him out of my mind, but easier said than done. What do you think?

 

NO! Do NOT spill the bean's to the W it's not your business. Trust me here I was right where you are not to long ago! The "Spite" Feeling will go away, it did for me after awhile. Read and Post here, work through those angry feeling's. The best way for you to get back at this mm (I assume it's he you are mad at) is to NOT contact him in anyway. NC show's to him he's no longer important in your life and that you are to good for him and trust me YOU are to good for him! Hang in there.

 

AP:)

[Shades of Grey]

I'm Stunned, sorry to add fuel to the fire here but in my opinion your situation is the exception where you should tell his wife.

 

Many of us who get involved with MM have to come to terms with our own contribution to our pain. Sometimes we have to put the W's needs before our own and that means not adding to her pain and accepting her choice to put trust into her marriage regardless of whether we know its undeserved or not. In doing so we are to an extent facing the consequences of our own bad choices.

 

You on the other hand were a victim of your MM's lies to a hideous extent. I personally think his wife deserves to know what kind of a man she is married to. One who not only lies and betrays her but makes up a disgusting fantasy life for himself in which she doesn't even exist! Why the h*ell should he just be able to waltz back into his real life leaving you in this state.

 

Not advice - just my opinion.

[imstunned]

I'm Stunned, sorry to add fuel to the fire here but in my opinion your situation is the exception where you should tell his wife.

 

Many of us who get involved with MM have to come to terms with our own contribution to our pain. Sometimes we have to put the W's needs before our own and that means not adding to her pain and accepting her choice to put trust into her marriage regardless of whether we know its undeserved or not. In doing so we are to an extent facing the consequences of our own bad choices.

 

You on the other hand were a victim of your MM's lies to a hideous extent. I personally think his wife deserves to know what kind of a man she is married to. One who not only lies and betrays her but makes up a disgusting fantasy life for himself in which she doesn't even exist! Why the h*ell should he just be able to waltz back into his real life leaving you in this state.

 

Not advice - just my opinion.

 

I too think like this - often. But at the moment Im still too emotionally involved with my exmm - ie I still care deeply about him - to tell his wife. I'd be wondering if he would get back in touch etc. If I do ever do anything (which could be hard as I dont know their phone number or address) I'll do it when I can do it and never look back!

 

On a good day, when I feel strong - I feel closer than ever to telling all. And it dosent feel like its out of spite or revenge then - it just feels like she has a right to know. He has done a total number on me, I'm sure I'm not the first, doubt I'll be the last. Then - on the flip side - I think I am the first, will be the last as he has had the wake up call that he needs to show how much he loves his wife. Mince for brains.

[Shades of Grey]

I too think like this - often. But at the moment Im still too emotionally involved with my exmm - ie I still care deeply about him - to tell his wife. I'd be wondering if he would get back in touch etc. If I do ever do anything (which could be hard as I dont know their phone number or address) I'll do it when I can do it and never look back!

 

On a good day, when I feel strong - I feel closer than ever to telling all. And it dosent feel like its out of spite or revenge then - it just feels like she has a right to know. He has done a total number on me, I'm sure I'm not the first, doubt I'll be the last. Then - on the flip side - I think I am the first, will be the last as he has had the wake up call that he needs to show how much he loves his wife. Mince for brains.

 

This just shows and proves that you were far far far too good for him!

 

Hugs xx

[TogetherForever]

Thanks for the advice everyone-i know that i shouldnt be a b*tch about the situation,and i have played it completely cool until now but i just couldnt help myself. You could be completely right and he may not be thinking about me at all. I do think its possible that he just told me that the wife knows just so i wont contact her, and that he also thinks i wont because it will lead to consequences within my own marriage. I hate the way that men think sometimes, that I will be the nutcase, even though i have NOT contacted him in the least, all this time. And he has to know he doesnt deserve to be treated with respect from me.

 

All i wanted from him was closure-when together, i always told him if he wanted to end it he was of course free to do so, as long as he did it in a respectful manner, which he promised he would. All obviously bullcrap. I wish there really was a machine that could erase all these memories away, like in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. How great would that be??

What really cracks me up is that his myspace headline is, " What goes around comes around!!". I really hope he gets his in the end. That smug bastard..

 

LoveIsTragic,

His myspace headline is just his reminder (to himself of course) that he will get his for being such a smug bastard.

Stay strong!!

TF

[outofdarkness]

... and then advertise it on a MySpace page for him to find!

 

 

 

Agreed - I don't see how you can contain the risk so that the fall-out from that hits only him, and not others. That may be "collateral damage" you're prepared to risk, but your posts don't show any ill will towards them so I'm assuming that's not your intention.

 

If you're wanting revenge, there are whole websites dedicated to that kind of thing. If you're just angry, and wanting to work through that, then take the advice others are given and achieve your own happiness. That way you gain in the process, rather than compromising yourself and ending up with a hollow victory.

Like the MySpace Idea!

[Love is Tragic]

Thank you to all for the fabulous advice! I think i am mostly past the whole idea of revenge now that ive had a few days to cool off. I just wish that i could forget him as easily as hes obviously forgotten about me. Wishing i could erase him from my mind permanently. I was completely in love with him, more so than any other man ive been with. Tragically so.. I never had the feelings that i have for him for anyone else, not really even for my own husband. Im pissed at myself for letting it get this bad. (hangs head in shame), but i miss him.

 

I wish i knew what he was thinking, wish i knew if he thinks of me the way i think of him. I dont wish any harm on his family, i know how he adores his kids, but i hope hes miserable inside! I just dont understand how he could treat me this way, especially when i know for a fact what we had was real. He knows this too. There is no way that all that was pretend, i just refuse to believe it.

 

I feel like if i could just see him one more time i could have more success in getting over him. Just to get a goodbye, and the closure that i desperately need. arrrrrgggggg!!!!

[imstunned]

Thank you to all for the fabulous advice! I think i am mostly past the whole idea of revenge now that ive had a few days to cool off. I just wish that i could forget him as easily as hes obviously forgotten about me. Wishing i could erase him from my mind permanently. I was completely in love with him, more so than any other man ive been with. Tragically so.. I never had the feelings that i have for him for anyone else, not really even for my own husband. Im pissed at myself for letting it get this bad. (hangs head in shame), but i miss him.

 

I wish i knew what he was thinking, wish i knew if he thinks of me the way i think of him. I dont wish any harm on his family, i know how he adores his kids, but i hope hes miserable inside! I just dont understand how he could treat me this way, especially when i know for a fact what we had was real. He knows this too. There is no way that all that was pretend, i just refuse to believe it.

 

I feel like if i could just see him one more time i could have more success in getting over him. Just to get a goodbye, and the closure that i desperately need. arrrrrgggggg!!!!

 

Huge huge hugs to you. I can so totally relate to how your feeling. Idont know when the pain will stop - but just keep posting and offloading untill it does.

 

xx