tangleInMind Posted May 16, 2003 Share Posted May 16, 2003 Hi Everyone, I had been in here to ask for advices which had helped me alot, since then I go in here when my mind get "tangly". I have a serious big question and I hope you guys can give me some ideas about it, and here is my story: For the last 1 1/2 years I have been on dating w/ different guys, and I must honestly say that 10 out of 10 guys showed their interests in me but in somehow I just don't have the luck w/ me. Every time I'm interested in someone -things go good at beginning but by time......it doesn't go well. I think its 'cuase of all the mind games.....sometimes I really don't know how to deal w/ it. Most of the guys I serious dated them, are sensitive and would not say what their had in their mind (I'm a quiet & sensitive too but though I'm always honestly about my feeling). So my question is: why does the guys always call me back after we aparted (mostly kinda ended in the air) and few weeks or months after they call me to make it up again, is it becuase they realize that I'm a truth nice girl or.........????????? Plz, help me to understand this -will appreciate it alot! thank you guys. Link to post Share on other sites
Reckless Posted May 17, 2003 Share Posted May 17, 2003 Hi Tangle, Unfortunately your post wasn't really easy to read or understand (maybe English isn't your first language) so that might be why you haven't got too many replies. Are you saying that you date guys and then they don't call you when they say they will? or that they dump you (don't continue to want to date you) but then call you weeks or even months later and want to fix things and go out with you again? You say you don't have any luck with the guys you've been dating - well, it takes a while to meet the right man, that's usually why you date, so a few failed attempts are normal. You have to just be yourself and try no to put too much pressure on the men you see, just have fun (not necessarily have sex with them) just enjoy their company, talking going to a movie, that sort of thing...and when you meet the right person, he'll want to be with you more and will call you. You sound like a nice girl - someone will appreciate you eventually, you'll see... R. Link to post Share on other sites
jessicakicksbut Posted May 17, 2003 Share Posted May 17, 2003 I would not get discouraged, dating is like gambling, sometimes you win, sometimes you loose. In the past, I knew a few girls who would day a guy for a few months and everything would be great...but things would go downhill soon after. I know in there cases, they may have had a few issues to work out before they can be successful in a relationship. For example, I has one friend who was way too clingy. She would think nothing of trying to call, IM, visit, etc. her boyfriend(s) a few times a day. Most guys would not tolerate this behavior, unless they like the attention. My advice to you is to take the dating game as it is - a game, where there are winners and losers. But, you also need to look to yourself to find if there is anything you may be doing wrong that will hamper your relationships before they even have a chance to grow. Link to post Share on other sites
tangleInMind Posted May 19, 2003 Share Posted May 19, 2003 Hi, Thank you for you guys' opinions -I'm really appreciated it! I have learned some good things from the two responses I got, but still I have this unclear question: why my three guys who I seriously dated.....(as jessicakicksbut said....dating is a game) we were playing games and in somehow ended in the air but couple weeks or months later, they called me......are they playing games w me just for fun....or maybe later on they consider to be really serious/sincere about me?????? Lately my ex-date call me and want to "hang out" -be friends which is fine w/ me as long we both clearly know how our relationship truly is...friendship or "friends"-dating. We aparted because he was not "ready" for settle down for a girlf/boyf relationship and he had admited that he were dating other girl(s) besides me at that time, and I said that I will respect him for that but I'm definitely not into that casual relationship w/ him- especially when he dating other girls at the same time. So I said that we still can be friends (besides that bad side of him, he is a good person though). Lately he had called me severel times....right now we are kinda playing games -speaking from my side, I'm unsure what I should do....I called him back (few days after) because I thought that maybe he just wants to be friends which is very ok w/ me....but if he wants more than that, then I really don't know what I should do about...i still like him a bit but I definitely don't want to date that kind of a player like him again......do you guys think he might have changed or he just wants to play games w/ me again? I mean...he is a nice looking doctor, so he has no problem w/ finding a date....why go back to me......in he past when we were dating, we hadn't done many anything great together.....besides the passionate thing. Plz, let me know what you guys think about it.....-I really need you guys' help -it has bother me in so long time about this dating games! Thanks a lot. Ps: I apologize for my poor english..if there any thing ur unclear about my letter, plz let me know.....I will try my best to explain to you! Thank you. Link to post Share on other sites
jessicakicksbut Posted May 20, 2003 Share Posted May 20, 2003 Well, you can have the man behind door #1 - a handsome doctor who makes good money, drives a nice car, but will not settle down into a relationship, and may possibly play games till he is at that "magic" age when he feels he is finally ready to settle down, or man behind door #2 - an average man with a decent job, who will actually want a relationship with you, will want to spend a great majority of his spare time with you, and will not play any games because he will fall in love with you. The choice is yours!! Link to post Share on other sites
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