lillun Posted November 9, 2007 Share Posted November 9, 2007 Hello everyone! I am new here but I'm sure all of you can help me! I have been with my boyfriend for 4 years now I am 21 and he will be 23 next month, we met the summer after I graduated highschool.. He moved in to my parents house after a year of dating. In June we bought a house together, we share a checking account, we have the same credit cards but he won't marry me.... I am confused on why he would let me buy the house with him and put me on his checking account and get credit cards together but won't ask me to marry him? We have everything planned out to where it is, who's in it what colors, food, cake ideas, invitations everything planned out.. just of course not the date... He is an amazing guy and I love him with all my heart but I'm not going to wait forever... I don't know what to do..? We're both financially stable I am a manager at a hotel and he is a maintenance mechanic making $50/hr..... He did mention one time that my parents can't afford a wedding right now, which I agree with but I'm not making my parents pay for the whole thing anyway and his parents won't let that happen either.... He keeps giving me excuses on why we can't get married... Does that mean he doesn't want to marry me? It's hard sitting back and watching all of my friends who have been with their boyfriend/fiance/husband for a year or less getting engaged/married. I'll always be the bridesmaid and never the bride. we do talk about getting married alot but he won't ask me. I don't know what to do like I said I'm not going to wait forever.. do you think I should move on?? Ideas please?? sorry so long just confused... Link to post Share on other sites
fluffy0 Posted November 9, 2007 Share Posted November 9, 2007 No one can tell you for sure whether he has intentions of marrying you or not. On the one hand, you are both pretty young, so maybe he just wants to wait. But it seems like you are both pretty stable and responsible so it's hard to say why he is stalling. My husband and I talked about our wedding very soon after we started going out, but it was a while before we actually got married. Maybe he thinks of the wedding talk as just sharing some fun dreams, but not anything serious? You should really ask him outright what his intentions with you are. Ask him the same questions you posted here. Try not to pressure him, just tell him that you are confused about the signals he is sending you, and that you took the steps of buying a house, joining finances, etc. as evidence that he intends to propose in the near future. Also, I would advise you to not share everything with him. Get your your own checking account and use the joint one only for joint expenditures. Also, shared credit cards aren't really a good idea even if you are married, because if one person gets into to debt there is no reason to drag the other person's credit score down with them. You should really be careful with that especially since you two are not married yet and you don't really know what his intentions are. Link to post Share on other sites
norajane Posted November 9, 2007 Share Posted November 9, 2007 Talk to him, but don't bring this up: It's hard sitting back and watching all of my friends who have been with their boyfriend/fiance/husband for a year or less getting engaged/married. I'll always be the bridesmaid and never the bride. He'll think you only want to get married because your friends are, and not because you love him. You do love him, don't you?? Because you didn't mention anything about love. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts