Trialbyfire Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 Then date me. I'm allergic to dogs! Cute oppath. I understand the lovesick puppy part. What I was getting at is that I DO think that every girl wants to have that *something special* - almost like a power over the guy - so that if he ever did have the capability of being a lovesick puppy, she'd be the only one to draw it out of him, if only for a minute. Make sense? I'm fed up with untameable guys, as well. As for power over someone, just give me real, mature love, not a puppy who's too effusive and too easy to hurt.
oppath Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 Cute oppath. I'm fed up with untameable guys, as well. As for power over someone, just give me real, mature love, not a puppy who's too effusive and too easy to hurt. Are you gonna bark all day about men, little doggy, or are you gonna bite! How would you define mature love?
Trialbyfire Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 Are you gonna bark all day about men, little doggy, or are you gonna bite! How would you define mature love? No doubt I can be a bitch... Mature love is one where the two of you are confident enough to show your emotion with each other, whether it's positive or negative emotions. If it's negative emotion, you work your way through it and come to a compromise or one party bends for the other, but not consistently so. It won't be the end of the world if there's negative emotion expressed, just a simple bump in the road. If someone is in the throws of puppy love, this kind of thing can crush. Also, I want a man who has the strength to handle me and be there, if I ever need him. None of the cowardly withdrawal b/s. I could go on and on.
melodymatters Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 No doubt I can be a bitch... Mature love is one where the two of you are confident enough to show your emotion with each other, whether it's positive or negative emotions. If it's negative emotion, you work your way through it and come to a compromise or one party bends for the other, but not consistently so. It won't be the end of the world if there's negative emotion expressed, just a simple bump in the road. If someone is in the throws of puppy love, this kind of thing can crush. Also, I want a man who has the strength to handle me and be there, if I ever need him. None of the cowardly withdrawal b/s. I could go on and on. Well said, TBF, WELL SAID !!!
Trialbyfire Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 Well said, TBF, WELL SAID !!! Thanks mm. I think most women and men are looking for this.
oppath Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 Thanks mm. I think most women and men are looking for this. Actually, most men are looking for a half dozen girls in tight shorts; sadly, whenever I go to McDonald's I ask for that when they say "anything else." Hasn't happened yet, not even at In-N-Out.
Star Gazer Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 I know what you mean, though, you want someone who loves you in such a way that your friends say "I've never seen someone love another person so much." Exactly. Mature love is one where the two of you are confident enough to show your emotion with each other, whether it's positive or negative emotions. If it's negative emotion, you work your way through it and come to a compromise or one party bends for the other, but not consistently so. It won't be the end of the world if there's negative emotion expressed, just a simple bump in the road. If someone is in the throws of puppy love, this kind of thing can crush. Also, I want a man who has the strength to handle me and be there, if I ever need him. None of the cowardly withdrawal b/s. Okay, I follow you now. Completely. Actually, most men are looking for a half dozen girls in tight shorts; sadly, whenever I go to McDonald's I ask for that when they say "anything else." Hasn't happened yet, not even at In-N-Out.
monkey00 Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 I know someone who has a bf like that...the guy with no backbone. I know she's settling for him but it's her choice. I think this whole 'love sick' thing is nice when you feel appreciated with tons of attention, but after awhile it starts wearing thin and eventually will become annoying and bored of him. I think everyone wants to feel a certain kind of appreciation from others as long as they felt they've put work into earning it. Giving it freely without earning it is unbalanced in any kind of relationship
amerikajin Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 No doubt I can be a bitch... Mature love is one where the two of you are confident enough to show your emotion with each other, whether it's positive or negative emotions. If it's negative emotion, you work your way through it and come to a compromise or one party bends for the other, but not consistently so. It won't be the end of the world if there's negative emotion expressed, just a simple bump in the road. If someone is in the throws of puppy love, this kind of thing can crush. Also, I want a man who has the strength to handle me and be there, if I ever need him. None of the cowardly withdrawal b/s. I could go on and on. Good post.
Author Racquel Colette Posted November 15, 2007 Author Posted November 15, 2007 The guy in your first post REEKS of insecurity and low esteem . After three months of fawning worship from him you will be back looking for some cocky dude who makes you open your own doors (and your own wallet) No, he is not reeking of insecurity. He noticed that a bush was blocking my doorway. He cared about me and when I was on vacation, he came over, mowed the lawn, and trimed the bush by my door. Why? Because he cared about me and wanted me to be happy. Do I ask him to open my door? No. Do I show I care back? Of course. I don't get how you can say this guy has insecurity and low esteem for showing his feelings. He has the confidence to show his feelings and do things because he cares for her. You want to make people you care about happy. I know a woman who became engaged a month ago, they are living together for a year now, her fiancee opens the door. He takes her to football games and concerts because he wants to be with her. He does little things for her just because he loves her just because he loves her very much. Of course she is equally caring and giving to him. She is cooking for his rather large family on Thanksgiving, for example. this is what you do when you really care, not play the backing off/I'm a man I need my space stuff.
amerikajin Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 Do I show I care back? Of course. And that's the key part. I think it's when a guy opens the door and doesn't get anything in return that he sets himself up to be a doormat. It's like the whole argument over who pays on dates. I have no problem paying on the first date if I've asked a girl out, which is usually the case. But if she starts indicating to me that she takes it for granted that I'm going to pay or that it's going to be a one-way relationship, I move on. I've learned the hard way that being a hard ass isn't necessarily going to win you any more favor from the ladies than being a wuss. The key is balance.
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