mcgintygirl Posted November 13, 2007 Share Posted November 13, 2007 Short version. I hooked up with a friend of someone I dated back in 2002 for a few weeks, then again in 2004 for a few weeks. Then last year we started hooking up again but this time it lasted a year and we realized we became the best of friends. We spent every weeekend together, weekdays, talked constantly. He had gotten out of a very hard relationship the previous year so we never pushed another relationship but both acknowledged we had one. We also never told my ex (his friend) about our involvement however all his other friends (who aren't friends with me ex) knew about me. We 100% agreed we were very close. Two months ago I started getting very emotional due to work stress. I cried one night about feeling like a secret from my ex (who I broke up with in 2001... yikes!). Somehow that night changed everything. A week later I had a serious accident, he barely was there for me. When I asked for his help to get through it, he decided we should be "conventional friends" and "slow down" I've been dealing with the accident emotionally for awhile now as well as serious work stress. He still wants us to be the "best buds" we were but I can't handle it as he has not been there for me, a side I never knew. He is now also "dating" a girl from medical school and when I asked if he was so at least I knew he snapped saying he was but would "not have that conversation with me". Yet he continually wants to text me, say hi to me, have me come over for dinner.... So forth. Unfortunately, I feel like he used me for sex for a year to get through a tough time and now that I am in my rough spot he has said "sorry I can't be there for you". He also says I'm insulting him when I confess that my feelings have been hurt and I felt used. Either way, he's happiest with me when I'm the old pal who is there for him and there is nothing rocking the boat. What is his deal? What an *******. 10 years of friendship and I just can't deal with this in my life. I am ignoring his calls, texts and so forth as he won't respect that I got hurt. Thoughts? Link to post Share on other sites
Lovegod Posted November 13, 2007 Share Posted November 13, 2007 Cut contact and move on with your life. Oh yeah, and DON'T go back to him again.... that includes five years from now. Link to post Share on other sites
SuperFantastico Posted November 24, 2007 Share Posted November 24, 2007 Welcome to the world of the rebound. You were the rebound girl. Like lovegod said, just ditch him. He dosnt care about you which is obvious, plus you got into an accident and hes dating other girls?! WTF is that. Cut your loses and move on. I know it sound easier then it is, but trust me(cause ive been there) its WAY better in the long run. Link to post Share on other sites
Author mcgintygirl Posted December 10, 2007 Author Share Posted December 10, 2007 You are right that it's harder say "see ya" than just doing it, especially when all of your friends are his friends. I have just learned to deal, be nice and be what he can't have. He's clearly screwy in the head as he told me, that she's not attractive but she's smart. = Study ****. That he has feelings for me and is confused because of med school and the girl is "cold" and won't require work. That he loves me. Has said it times before, saying it still.. Must be awesome to be the new girl when you're still not over your ex. Hah... Karma will be terrible. PS: I wasn't in an accident, I just had a emotional freak out over my job and working 70 plus hours a week. Just killing with kindness. Link to post Share on other sites
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