cocods13 Posted November 14, 2007 Share Posted November 14, 2007 So my boyfriend of 2 years cheated on me,at a bar, i found out in one of his text messages, but he says he doesnt remember any of it because he was very drunk? I love him so much but how can i ever trust him again........its worse that he doesnt remember becasue how many times has this happened before that I dont know about.......should i stay with him Link to post Share on other sites
Krytie TV Posted November 14, 2007 Share Posted November 14, 2007 Well thast depends on how dependent and masochistic you are. Are you either of those things? Link to post Share on other sites
Author cocods13 Posted November 14, 2007 Author Share Posted November 14, 2007 I am extremely dependent on him, he means the world to me but i want him to appreciate me...he obviously doesnt if he is making out with other girls.......how long do i wait before giving him another chance? Link to post Share on other sites
Trimmer Posted November 14, 2007 Share Posted November 14, 2007 Do you actually believe that he doesn't remember? Doesn't seem really likely. I think the only thing that tells you is that he thinks you are so stupid and have so little respect for yourself that you would release him of his responsibility for his actions because he "didn't remember..." ...i want him to appreciate me...he obviously doesnt ... What do you mean "extremely dependent" on him? Do you depend on him for shelter and food? Or are you emotionally dependent on him? Link to post Share on other sites
Ocean-Blue Posted November 14, 2007 Share Posted November 14, 2007 Unless he was drugged with something like rohypnol or beaten into a temporary coma...I don't see how he can NOT remember having sex. The only way his not being able to remember makes sense is if he was raped (so he was out cold but his little me was wide awake - this is, I've read, physiologically possible). He is probably lying. Listen to your gut, what does it tell you? You have to decide if him cheating is something you can get past. If so, you have to sit this drunkard/idiot down and talk to him. Can you see yourself trusting him after all of this? Will you be able to escape the doubts that will creep in? Is he worth it? Link to post Share on other sites
littlekitty Posted November 14, 2007 Share Posted November 14, 2007 People can still be awake, but so drunk that they suffer memoryloss. But usually they do remember having sex. If this happened this time, how many other times might it have happened? What if it happens again? How will he or you know? Is it really worth all those worries? Link to post Share on other sites
cj1988 Posted November 14, 2007 Share Posted November 14, 2007 sadly enough in mine and my H party days, we had sex a few times and he did not remember either. I know I have been so drunk I do not remember a lot about what happened, but sex I could not forget. Even if it is bits and parts, I remember doing it.......if he was that trashed, it probably did not function anyway.....good luck, be strong ! Link to post Share on other sites
KenzieAbsolutely Posted December 8, 2007 Share Posted December 8, 2007 i've been drunk enough to lose whole parts of an evening, including sexual activity. i've even woken up wondering how i got home, and still not remembering anything past a certain point even after being reminded. this could have happened to him too, and has happened to many other people as well. people who have not had this happen do not understand it and sometimes don't believeit, but it still happens regardless. in any case, that will not make you feel any better as to whether he remembers or not. he still did it, and it will still bother you, so the circumstances surrounding his actions probably don't matter too much to you. instead of focusing on his reasons/excuses, let yourself feel your own feelings and decide what to do next. Link to post Share on other sites
oppath Posted December 8, 2007 Share Posted December 8, 2007 But if you are that drunk, you can't text coherently. Link to post Share on other sites
KenzieAbsolutely Posted December 8, 2007 Share Posted December 8, 2007 But if you are that drunk, you can't text coherently. also not true. read up on blacking out. you seem completely able to function and normal to everyone around you, and yet...you're not. you drive a car, take a shower, have a gang-bang, whatever. and the whole time, you're totally blacked out, no recollection. scary, really. Link to post Share on other sites
Racquel Colette Posted December 8, 2007 Share Posted December 8, 2007 It's possible it never happened because if he was that drunk he doesn't remember cheating, he was too drunk to get it up probably. The test doesn't mean anything because it was some chick playing a joke on him who knew he had a girlfriend. So, she sent him the text knowing you would probably see it. He didn't cheat at all! Link to post Share on other sites
Brendi_thesnake Posted December 8, 2007 Share Posted December 8, 2007 How about you getting drunk and doing the same to him, yes maybe that'll work. Link to post Share on other sites
KenzieAbsolutely Posted December 8, 2007 Share Posted December 8, 2007 How about you getting drunk and doing the same to him, yes maybe that'll work. a little eye for an eye, huh? i like your style. either way, if she did or didn't do that, the relationship will have to undergo some serious overhauling for either or both to get past it. i say, if you're angry enough at someone for doing something to you to the point that you aren't satisfied til you get revenge, you might as well just end it. that could turn into a very vicious cycle! Link to post Share on other sites
PandorasBox Posted December 8, 2007 Share Posted December 8, 2007 I agree, that two wrongs don't make a right. So getting back at him might sound good but probably not the best idea. If you're as dependent on him as you say, then it might not really matter to you,what others here tell you their opinon is for you to do because you may feel the need to stay reguardless of what he has said or done. Its a call you will have to make on your own. Try to go with whatever you know in your head is the right thing to do. Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
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