Can I recover?

[suthern_gurl]

I have been reading for the past few months about cheating husbands/boyfriends to try to ease the pain that I have been feeling. I need advice BAD. Here goes a quick run down of the past 9 months.

 

I suspected my boyfriend of 7 years and father of 2 children was up to something by his behavior. He lost his job and started drinking pretty heavily, almost daily. He then started to come in later and later. I went thru his phone and secured his phone records and found out that he had been spending quite a bit of time talking to another woman. Now here is the hard part - Mother's Day 2007, new babygirl was 2 months old and our oldest was 3 at the time. He took me and my family out to dinner, paid for everything, treated me like a queen. We got home and he says to me, you don't mind if I go to the bar for awhile do you? I said no, he says to me "wait up for me and you better be naked". Well, I fell asleep and woke up around 3:00am. He never called or came home. Finally, at 5:00am I called him. I waited awhile to see what time he was going to come in on his own. He says he got drunk and fell asleep in his car. I waited in the driveway for him to return. He didn't see me as I watched him pull in the driveway and he started going thru his phone (at 5:00 am!!). I had no real proof since the woman kept telling me that they were just friends. I tried to forgive him, but the behavior only continued. I went out of town with co-workers and he called me at 2:00am to see if "I made it" - 2:00am?? I found out later (with phone records again) that he again called this same woman at 2:00am. Also, according to the phone records, he never came home that night. He was calling our house at 10:00am for some reason. Anyways, I can go on and on.

I really need some good advice, I have been a mess. I am a very outgoing person, who is starting to shut everyone down.

I need to know what to do. Should I leave or should I stay? I keep arguing with him, and all of his belongings are in his car. He says he is sorry and wants to start over. He started working recently and says that he is done with that, but he doesn't want me to keep brining it up. I am screaming at him, breaking things, ANGRY. I have crazy thoughts, like going to her house and dragging her out...and well you know the rest. Please help..Suthern Gurl:lmao: