I want a cheap and pretty ring, dammit.

[HeadlessZebra]

The love of my life proposed to me The problem is a ring. He likes quality, expensive things but is on a tight budget, so I just know I'm going to end up with a 24k ring with a diamond that could easily be mistaken for a grain of salt. I, on the other hand, like pretty and emotionally significant things regardless of material quality or price, and would much prefer, say, a larger heart-shaped rose quartz ring with silver filigree or something like that. How does one broach this topic without being unforgivably tacky? This is a thing I'll have to wear for the rest of my life!

[fluffy0]

I'm assuming u are talking about an egagement ring not the wedding ring though it's kind of unclear since you said he had already proposed to you.

 

But anyway, since you are already engaged so him suprising you with the ring is not an issue, why not go pick out the ring together? Tell him (very gently) how u feel. Don't make it so much about you willing to settle for a cheap, less precious ring as long as it's bigger that might make him feel bad and make you look less classy. Just tell him that you don't feel comfortable wearing a diamond or that it just isn't your style. Tell him that it would make you really happy to be able to pick out your own ring and that this is how you always dreamed of your engagement to be. He'll probably be eager to please you and not mind so much.

[Lezbean]

Get a "cultured" diamond.

 

They are grown in a lab, but are still a diamond and much less expensive and PLUS no one had to die for it.

 

My sis has one of these rings as a wedding ring and it's stunning! I think it may be more perfect than a natural diamond.

 

http://www.diamondnexuslabs.com/jewelry/index.php?cPath=63_111

[Grrlish]

I'm assuming u are talking about an egagement ring not the wedding ring though it's kind of unclear since you said he had already proposed to you.

 

But anyway, since you are already engaged so him suprising you with the ring is not an issue, why not go pick out the ring together? Tell him (very gently) how u feel. Don't make it so much about you willing to settle for a cheap, less precious ring as long as it's bigger that might make him feel bad and make you look less classy. Just tell him that you don't feel comfortable wearing a diamond or that it just isn't your style. Tell him that it would make you really happy to be able to pick out your own ring and that this is how you always dreamed of your engagement to be. He'll probably be eager to please you and not mind so much.

 

I was wondering the same thing? Are you talking wedding ring or engagement ring?

 

Either way, if he hasn't purchased it, I would assume that he might want your input. Has he mentioned it?

 

If he doesn't bring it up in any way, you should be really subtle and tactful about giving input. Next time he brings up the engagement/wedding, you could ask if he feels like going ring shopping 'this weekend' or whenever.

 

Umm, I made the mistake of declining when my bf asked me if I wanted to go engagement ring shopping one day as we were walking through the mall (on a weekend trip out of town). We live no where near a mall so the unplanned opportunities for this to happen again are going to be rare. I realize that if I ask him if he wants to go ring 'window shopping' that he may ask if we're going because I'm buying one for him.

 

You could, you know...buy a ring for him, too. Or to bring up the subject, ask him what kind of ring he wants. He may decline but it opens the door to him asking what you might want. Be prepared! He might want one!

[Citizen Erased]

Get a "cultured" diamond.

 

They are grown in a lab, but are still a diamond and much less expensive and PLUS no one had to die for it.

 

My sis has one of these rings as a wedding ring and it's stunning! I think it may be more perfect than a natural diamond.

 

http://www.diamondnexuslabs.com/jewelry/index.php?cPath=63_111

 

Oh wow they are beautiful

[allina]

Get a "cultured" diamond.

 

They are grown in a lab, but are still a diamond and much less expensive and PLUS no one had to die for it.

 

My sis has one of these rings as a wedding ring and it's stunning! I think it may be more perfect than a natural diamond.

 

http://www.diamondnexuslabs.com/jewelry/index.php?cPath=63_111

 

This is what I want for my engagement ring. They're cheaper, often more flawless and slave labor isn't used to extract them

[curiousnycgirl]

Don't know if this will work for you, but for me I told my b/f that I have big fingers, so something little would look really bad on my hand, and therefore is not worth the cost.

 

Of course I then said not to bother buying anything rather than something small - but you could suggest he buy something less traditional that would look great.

 

Good luck and hey congratulations!

[Leoni]

I would avoid any stone that's not durable, even though it's pretty. Imagine how you and possibly your SO would feel, if you accidentally cracked the stone.

[Star Gazer]

First, CONGRATULATIONS!!

 

Second, I totally agree about getting a cultured/synthetic diamond. I am SO going that route!

[Touche]

You guys are all really smart. This was actually one of my H's and I's first little arguments. (I won..hee hee.) I still proudly wear my synthetic diamond and jeweler's have to use their loupe to tell the difference. It's set in 14kt gold of course though. It's held up very well over the 13 years that I've worn it.

 

And by convincing my H to not get me the "real" thing, we were able to take the most memorable European honeymoon. We couldn't do both at that time. He thanks me now for being such a practical woman! We can afford the real thing now, but I'd never, ever agree to it. What a waste of money.

 

If he MUST get you real diamonds, why not get a really pretty eternity band as your wedding band and he can get you the synthetic diamond(s) for your engagement ring...set in the real thing of course. That would be a really nice compromise, don't you think? And no one will know the difference..including you!

[Star Gazer]

If he MUST get you real diamonds, why not get a really pretty eternity band as your wedding band and he can get you the synthetic diamond(s) for your engagement ring...set in the real thing of course. That would be a really nice compromise, don't you think? And no one will know the difference..including you!

 

That's exactly what I want someday: a big huge synthetic diamond for the engagement ring, and an eternity band of real CONFLICT-FREE diamonds.

[Storyrider]

Is a synthetic diamond the same thing as cubic zerchonium (spelling?)

 

I was always worried it would make me think I had a synthetic marriage. But maybe it would have been fine. We went the tiny, flawed diamond route. But I like the setting for my ring, it is antique from the 1930s. We spent almost nothing because we were both students.

[Star Gazer]

Is a synthetic diamond the same thing as cubic zerchonium (spelling?)

 

No. A synthetic/cultured diamond is the same thing as a mined diamond, it's just made by a machine in 4 days under the same conditions that it takes the Earth to make a mined diamond over a million years.

 

A CZ has a completely different chemical makeup, and is a completely different stone. Many people can tell a CZ from a diamond from 5 feet away. However, a jeweler often cannot tell a synthetic/cultured diamond from a mined diamond, even with their fancy dancy instruments.

[SidCaesar]

One word: moissanite.

[lindya]

Is there something you both love that could somehow be represented by a ring that needn't cost huge amounts of money?

 

Let's say, just for an example, that the two of you had both read and loved the book Anna Karenina. Had discussed it on your first date. As a nod to that thing you both loved, you could get a Russian style wedding ring which really needn't cost much, but that would be special for both of you.

 

What film/book/place is special to you both? How could that be represented in a ring? However much material things might matter to your boyfriend, if he's asking you to marry him it's because he loves you. I'm sure he'll listen if you tell him that you want this ring to represent those feelings, rather than a desire to impress other people with the number of carats involved.

[Aloros]

White sapphire is another alternative. It's cheaper, it's nice and hard, and it is GORGEOUS. I've seen a white sapphire engagement ring that just blew most diamond rings out of the water. Icy white with a lot of fire.

[brothermartin]

Pick the ring out yourself, say from a list of 5 or more, and let him decide which one to get you. But make sure he understands that only one of those 5 are what he can choose from.

[hustava]

oh wow those synthetic ones looks great. They have the same makeup as a diamond?

[bozwa]

Be careful who you are buying from on the internet. When I came across this thread a few days ago and saw the link for Diamond Nexus Labs, I checked it out and found some rings that I absolutely fell in love with and was convinced that I wanted to get my ring from there. BUT I am not one to blindly buy from unknowns without doing a little research first (been screwed a lot LOL). So I did my research. The ONLY positive things said about this place are blurbs written by the company themselves or someone who works for the company. Basically I read in several places that they are selling regular CZ jewelry passed off as lab-grown diamonds marked up A TON. So basically what they are charging $1000+ for you can get at, say, Walmart or some other store for 10 bucks. I'm not one to just believe what I read on the internet, but if it's repeated everywhere, I think there may be some truth to it.

 

Moral of the story: Do your homework before you spend a chunk of your dough.

[princesssockhead]

My FH and I were in a similar conundrum although we are both thrifty but enjoy nice things.

 

I'm so glad he waited to get the ring until we both could pick it out!! We got the absolute perfect engagement ring and I stare at it on a daily basis thinking to myself how much I love it and it's a great representation of our unity and love together.

 

We went for moissanite after doing very thorough research on the internet and looking at real diamonds at the jewelers. I knew I didn't want a real diamond from the get go due to the child slave labor, bloodshed, and stupid fake mark-up on diamonds.

 

I was considering a ruby ring (rubies are 3rd on the list of being the strongest stone, moissanite is 2nd just below a diamond) and it's also both of our birthstone. A pearl would have been neat too or even a moonstone...I wanted a durable metal too. I also have metal allergies so it was important to get the quality.

 

We wound up going into Helzberg diamonds one evening and walked away smiling after placing an impromptu order for my engagement ring. We also put it on a 0% apr card through Helzberg. I don't advocate for credit cards but during this particular time we need to save our money for the wedding and we can worry about paying the card off afterwards. So we'll even be able to get the wedding bands from Helzberg now with no worries and no additional hundreds of dollars up front.

 

You should check out their charles & colvard (the only moissanite distributor, that I've heard of anyway) imperial moissanite collection. I got a beautiful unique white gold setting with a .50 carat moissanite stone in it. It's even more sparkley than my gf's real diamond ring, it's unique, and it was ethical. A win-win all around.

 

Good luck and you'll find your perfect ring too, it just takes some diligent looking and bargain shopping (you'd be surprised by what nice things you can get on the cheap).

[sunshinegirl]

Interesting. I'd never heard of moissanite before, so I googled it. Guess what the first (sponsored) link was? None other than Diamond Nexus Labs with a link to "Problems with Moissanite".

[norajane]

Be careful who you are buying from on the internet. When I came across this thread a few days ago and saw the link for Diamond Nexus Labs, I checked it out and found some rings that I absolutely fell in love with and was convinced that I wanted to get my ring from there. BUT I am not one to blindly buy from unknowns without doing a little research first (been screwed a lot LOL). So I did my research. The ONLY positive things said about this place are blurbs written by the company themselves or someone who works for the company. Basically I read in several places that they are selling regular CZ jewelry passed off as lab-grown diamonds marked up A TON. So basically what they are charging $1000+ for you can get at, say, Walmart or some other store for 10 bucks. I'm not one to just believe what I read on the internet, but if it's repeated everywhere, I think there may be some truth to it.

 

Moral of the story: Do your homework before you spend a chunk of your dough.

 

See, the thing is, there are very, very few companies that create diamonds in a lab vs. mining them. Only 3 or 4 do, and one of those companies only makes yellow diamonds, and none of them are mass-marketed on the internet! Those diamonds cost as much or more than the mined diamonds. It's a very expensive process and requires very expensive machines.

 

So, all those other supposedly lab created diamonds are CZ, just marketed in such a way that if you aren't careful, you'll believe they are a diamond.

[princesssockhead]

Interesting. I'd never heard of moissanite before, so I googled it. Guess what the first (sponsored) link was? None other than Diamond Nexus Labs with a link to "Problems with Moissanite".

 

Oh yes I looked at the diamondnexus rings before I even dreamed about moissanite but something about them was sketchy to me... I didn't like the fact that they discouraged the buying over other diamond alternatives over their own or the fact that I would have to buy a $400+ ring from them, see how it looked in person that way, and then return it for a refund (that I may never get) if I didn't like it...

 

Moissanite caught my eye because a) I could find it at Helzberg or JcPenny or even Kohls and Target b) the hardness was just a little below that of a diamond's c) they didn't talk smack about other diamond alternatives, in fact, they simply stated it wasn't even comparable to a diamond but rather a stone of it's own...

 

I'm so thankful I chose my moissanite. I even heard recently that it's gaining popularity and may be going up in price (which is stupid and one reason I hate diamonds in the first place - the fake market) but if nothing else, it means my bling just became a little more valued.

 

I'm going to insure it just as I would any diamond ring. I would be so sad if this ring was stolen or lost.

[carhill]

http://www.simstalk.com/forums/forumdisplay.php?f=15

 

The sims forum isn't very busy, as the site caters more to diamond hobbyists, but should have some definitive information. Be sure to check out the picture thread.

 

Main diamond forums are here:

 

http://www.diamondring.com/forums/

 

I've been a member there since it was DiamondTalk back in the 90's and we've always dished the straight dirt on gemstones (I'm a hobbyist, not a professional). My best advice is to respect the guy's desire to go traditional and ease him into the budget and style/gem part. Using the information I learned on DT, I bought my wife her e-ring from a jeweler in NYC and got a quite nice older "real" RB diamond for a very modest price (much less than our current monthly mortgage payment).

 

Personally, if a sim is desired, I'd buy the sim online with right of return/refusal and have the setting made/designed locally by a recommended jeweler. Perhaps, that way, his desire for quality (and his input) could be satisfied but with a more cost-effective gem (simulant).

 

We own numerous non-diamond gems, like tanzanite, ruby, sapphire, alexandrite and a host of others, but nothing approaches properly cut diamonds, IMO, for the show of fire in a properly designed ring. To many details for this venue but there are vast differences in how the gem "faces up" or "fires", even in the same price range. Experience makes the difference in recognizing the nuances.

 

Congratulations on your engagement!