What is 180?

[LittleFlower]

I keep remembering little things he said to me in the beginning when he was leaving.

 

This was one of the better ones:

I can't give her up because I don't want to feel as bad as you are feeling right now.

WTF ?? I did remind him that no matter what happened to him, he would never ever feel as bad as I was feeling.

 

Another one was that her and I were 2 entirely different people. So, what the hell was he doing with me for 20 years, waiting till someone different from me came along, was I not good enough for the past 20 years?

 

He said that he realised he was being selfish, he kept repeating those words, it's as if because he was admitting to it, that made it ok and that was his first step to recovery. Like my brother at his AA meeting, 'my name is ~~~~~ and I am an alcoholic' admitting it is the first step to recovery. My husband would say ' my name is ****** and I am a selfish bstrd', there, you are absolved because you have admitted it.

 

Except he doesn't have a 12 step programme to follow.

 

[T L]

I keep remembering little things he said to me in the beginning when he was leaving.

 

This was one of the better ones:

I can't give her up because I don't want to feel as bad as you are feeling right now.

WTF ?? I did remind him that no matter what happened to him, he would never ever feel as bad as I was feeling.

 

Another one was that her and I were 2 entirely different people. So, what the hell was he doing with me for 20 years, waiting till someone different from me came along, was I not good enough for the past 20 years?

 

He said that he realised he was being selfish, he kept repeating those words, it's as if because he was admitting to it, that made it ok and that was his first step to recovery. Like my brother at his AA meeting, 'my name is ~~~~~ and I am an alcoholic' admitting it is the first step to recovery. My husband would say ' my name is ****** and I am a selfish bstrd', there, you are absolved because you have admitted it.

 

Except he doesn't have a 12 step programme to follow.

 

 

 

I got fed some lines when I got given the farewell speach........

 

Like...'TL you would have had an affair yourself eventually because I dont have sex with you very often!' nice way to justify your infidelity Mrs TL.

 

...and she didnt even give ME the old 'I love you not in love with you speach' she actually said that is what she had told the OM ABOUT ME!!!

 

...and when I said why do you lie so much she said 'I dont even know I am doing it most of the time.'

 

...and then when I didnt want the W to have the house to herself when she picked up her stuff, I mentioned that a friend would be here, she said 'TL you know you can trust me' he he he

 

Thats the best one.

 

They must teach this cr*p at cheaters school.

[LittleFlower]

I got fed some lines when I got given the farewell speach........

 

Like...'TL you would have had an affair yourself eventually because I dont have sex with you very often!' nice way to justify your infidelity Mrs TL.

 

...and she didnt even give ME the old 'I love you not in love with you speach' she actually said that is what she had told the OM ABOUT ME!!!

 

...and when I said why do you lie so much she said 'I dont even know I am doing it most of the time.'

 

...and then when I didnt want the W to have the house to herself when she picked up her stuff, I mentioned that a friend would be here, she said 'TL you know you can trust me' he he he

 

Thats the best one.

 

They must teach this cr*p at cheaters school.

 

When my husband was giving me all these lines, it was like an alien was talking to me, I'd never heard him speak like that before.

I spoke to the OW on the phone one day, and she came out with exactly the same crap. She was an absolute joke, telling me I need to move on with my life, that she wasn't having an affair with my husband, she was just counselling him, think that may be a new metaphor for having sex with him. She said she had morals and when I asked her if she had kissed my husband, she said yes, then said, well maybe I don't have morals, stupid bitch !

She denied being married, denied booking into a hotel with him, which I found out by accident. Thing is, I told her my husband had told me she was married and they did go to a hotel, and she still denied it.

 

She was absolutely so nasty to me, and now my husband sounds just like her, talks like her, and comes out with all these lines now that I'm sure he hears when she's in bed with him, counselling him.

[Ladyjane14]

A wayward spouse isn't much different than a ventriloquist's dummy while they're under-the-influence like that. What you're hearing is the affair partner's drivel, and certainly not worth paying a whole lot of attention to. You can't reason with unreasonable people.

 

He won't be able to think for himself until the new car smell has worn off the OW, hon.

[LittleFlower]

A wayward spouse isn't much different than a ventriloquist's dummy while they're under-the-influence like that. What you're hearing is the affair partner's drivel, and certainly not worth paying a whole lot of attention to. You can't reason with unreasonable people.

 

He won't be able to think for himself until the new car smell has worn off the OW, hon.

 

Thanks Ladyjane, I know what you mean, my sister always said that someone was pouring poison in his ears, and I think she may be right. The other woman wants him for herself and will set her sights on tearing him away from me. The woman doesn't even know me but she'll tell him anything just to get her paws on him.

 

Hope the new car smell fades soon, want him back, but all I can do is sit and wait and hope for now, and maybe he wont ever come back, and I'm sad about the thought of that. I'm breaking up.