how has your personality been shaped during childhood?

[nashua]

by parents, significant relationships, spiritual experiences and life events?

 

I have been asked to write an autobiogrpahical statement addressing this question and kind of feel I'm stuck. I was hoping some of you could share how you would answer this question to give me some assistance on where to look for the answeres within myself.

 

Also, how would you say you worked with yourself to resove early life issues and move toward persoanl wholeness?

 

Thanks for the feedback!

[ElvenPriestess]

To tell you the truth, not all things from earlier life are as easy to resolve as others. I know for myself I still battle with the fact that I was raised one religion and I believe another. I would also say my eating habits are somewhat reflective of that, I always grew up with a certain standard, healthy, finish all the healthy food even if you don't finish the main course.

 

My dad had a bitter attitude to relationships growing up, I made SURE not to have that problem as best I could. I'm very independant, but growing up I kept to myself alot especially at home. I've been instilled with a high set of morales which I don't think are going anywhere.

 

I hope that helps with your question, let me know if I can further assist.

[amaysngrace]

For me, the youngest of six, my Mom always referred to me as her "baby", even when I was like twelve. I'm still pretty immature. A kid at heart and in mind a little bit too. She always said I was "the smartest one". She still says it sometimes to this day. I believe I am the smartest one.

 

These are labels and we tend to identify with them if they are spoken often enough.

 

I was molested as a child. That changed my life. But I don't want to get into it because it isn't very pleasant. But it was a major event. I can't really remember any good events that molded me as a person. I think after the bad thing happened I just lived in my own little dream world. So there could have been something very good that happened but nothing was as good as the fantasy I lived in to leave a lasting impression on me.

 

I think it is labels, events and people who help make us who we are today.

 

Good luck with your paper.

[Woggle]

I was severely abused by my mother and because of that I have issues with women to this day. In a way I think it has somewhat effected me positively because I am less likely to put up with some of the crap I see other men put up with but I know it has badly scarred me in some not so good ways.

 

Because of this I left home at 17 and I had to survive on the streets being damn near homeless at times. If were not able to get into public housing I probably would have been homeless. That period toughened me up and taught me how to survive. It also gave me an appreciation for what I have now because when you feel what is like to be at rock bottom you know how lucky you are if you make it out. Because of this I don't small stuff stress me.

[marlena]

I had a wonderful childhood. Two very loving and supportive parents and three amazing sisters. My parents were rather old - fashioned and strict and very family- orientated. My parents never ever hit us or spoke badly to us. They worked very hard to offer us the best in life. I always felt loved and protected. They passed away three years ago and I miss them terribly.

 

As a kid, I had lots of friends and was always out playing and having fun. Today, as an adult, whenever I feel troubled I evoke memories from my childhood. The images behind my eyes make me smile. I draw strength and courage from these memories.

 

What helped shape my personality? Growing up in the radical sixties and seventies and then my move to Europe. Living and travelling in Europe has been a cultural eye - opener in the sense that it enabled me to form a more spherical view of the diverse world we live in. Another thing that tremendously impacted my life was living in a country ruled by a dictatorship during my college years. To this experience I owe my interest in worldwide politics.

 

I have been very fortunate in many ways.

[ElvenPriestess]

I was severely abused by my mother and because of that I have issues with women to this day. In a way I think it has somewhat effected me positively because I am less likely to put up with some of the crap I see other men put up with but I know it has badly scarred me in some not so good ways.

 

Because of this I left home at 17 and I had to survive on the streets being damn near homeless at times. If were not able to get into public housing I probably would have been homeless. That period toughened me up and taught me how to survive. It also gave me an appreciation for what I have now because when you feel what is like to be at rock bottom you know how lucky you are if you make it out. Because of this I don't small stuff stress me.

 

I too left at 17, and was literally without a home on 3 separate instances. So I know how that feels. I was in a women's shelter at one point, and you're right. It does teach you how to be a survivor. And when you're better off, even just a little, you appreciate it all the more.

[Pedigree]

-As far as the basics go, I've had it very lucky. Both of my parents are successful professionals and make a good amount of money. And I'll admit that this makes it easy for me to go into "take things for granted" mode.

-Always have been taught to be open-minded.

-Mum's an authoritarian, so as a result I'm pretty crap at taking initiative as I usually wait for instructions before doing something.

-Dad taught me to be frugal so I've always been frugal. Hell, I ate at a Sushi train yesterday and doing the math in my head everytime I eat a plate.

[Trialbyfire]

I grew up with a wonderful family who were practicing moderates, as far as religion was concerned. My parents were strict, always walking in lockstep with each other, but loving and supportive to us. Our nickname for our parents is and was "the wall of frowns". Don't be doing anything bad, 'cause you'll be caught...guaranteed, and you won't like it much when you get caught.

 

We were a hyper-active bunch, so they made certain we were involved in sports, focused academically and in the arts. It couldn't have been easy for them because it must have been like herding cats. We were all determined, vocal and stubborn little gits. We were never hit or even spanked.

 

Edit- As for affect on me personally, I'm still a determined, vocal and stubborn little git.

[kkthxbye]

Wow what a great question. That's actually an interesting topic you have to write on. Really provokes long forgotten thoughts.....

 

 

I'm just amazed at how people turn out regardless of their backgrounds. And how people sometimes tend to give credit their experiences for how they behave today. Is it society that shapes us? Or were we born this way..... amazing debate.

 

Personally, I had a good childhood. Sure I had bad experiences, a near death trama in my 20's, and for some reason have to learn everything the hard way.

 

If it weren't for what I experienced in this lifetime, I wouldn't be the person I am today. I'm a completely different human being than I was just a few short years ago. And I continue to change, evolve, and some days, regress.

 

I began picking up books when I couldn't find the answers to life's problems that dragged me down, and in that research I found answers that fit my life's questions. I grew up in an almost athiest home, religion was bad bad (because of both my parents' bad experiences) and was set out in the world to find my own fit. I found a sense of spirituality within myself after some hard times. Instead of drugs or alchohol to dull the regret and pain, I found a new pair of eyes of which to view my life and the world in. I figured out what the word forgiveness meant. And for the first time, I learned how to forgive myself. It seemed to me as a kid, Christians had this stuff in spades. Forgiveness. To someone like me, it was a whole new world.

 

Whoosh! Regrets were a thing of the past. Sure I rant and rave and vent, but in the end I regret nothing. Each adventure leads to new ones, and all it takes is one good pioneer hat, and here we go again.

 

It was an awakening, brought on by loss of control in my life, and have never looked back since, until now. Wow I've come a long way baby. And I still have quite a journey ahead.

 

My personality was shaped by me. My experiences gave me the tools to learn about myself. The product sometimes does not fit into conventional American society, but I'm alright with that analysis.

 

And my memories, both good and bad, are just those. Distant memories.

 

Great topic, wow thanks!

[Dazza123]

My early childhood was great despite my mum and dad breaking up when i was 5 or 6... my relationship with my dad faded over the years which i found extremely upsetting. My sister got sexually assaulted when i was around 9-10 which messed me up big time... i knew and hated the person that did it, i wanted to cut his throat and at the same time he made me feel guilty and dirty because i didnt really understand love at that age and i felt as though i was maybe sexually assaulting my sister (which i wasnt at all) we both loved each other as sister and brother and huged and kissed regually in an appropriate way, my mum went through a few arse hole boyfriends and a couple of goods ones until she met my step father, i was about 12-13 and then my life became messed up because he didnt and doesnt like me very much (amoung a few otherthings)... age 16 i was doing drugs and basically wanted to die, 18 i told him and my mum to get stuffed and moved in with my grandmother... started coming off the antidepressants and started feeling good again... and now i feel happyness for my early childhood and alot of resentment and ill feeling for alot of it after then.

[Storyrider]

I grew up in a supportive household with two educated parents. I always knew they cared about me, they spent time with me, etc.

 

However, they argued loudly and put me in the middle, especially my dad. He was constantly telling me what was wrong with my mother and why she was mistaken about her parenting style, her bad temper etc. She was a screamer who flew off the handle a lot.

 

As a result, I learned to play them against each other so I could get away with bad report cards, etc.

 

They were both outspoken and opinionated and so was my brother, who was a constant, and I mean constant, talker. He never, ever shut up. He's not like that as an adult, but as a child and teenager he was almost impossible to live with. As a teenager he was belligerent and verbally abusive to my mother.

 

Because of all this, I learned to shut down emotionally and withdraw into myself as a coping mechanism. I created a bubble around myself, basically, by reading books and fantasizing.

 

I still fall back on these same ways to cope as an adult, which has its advantages and disadvantages.