gordon_gc Posted November 27, 2007 Share Posted November 27, 2007 Hi, It's now been 2 years since last serious relationship. Been quite a painful one but anyway, that's not the topic ! Been seeing that girl lately and for once in 2 years, I've had a good feeling about it. During the 2 years, i've been on and off but never anything serious and strangely, girls in these cases have always been hooked on while i wasnt. Here i am now, hooked on that girl and i have to admit i have a problem i wanna learn to solve. Everytime i find something slightly different in her behaviour, it tends to make me sorta 'insecure' ,wondering, and over analysing details in behavioural changes. It's like i don't trust no more, trying to know something that might not even be happening (but in my head). It tends to make me real clingy (things im usually not) and in a quest to make her talk which obviously backfire on me. Obviously, it only tends to upset her when i keep saying or asking "lately..." "are you ok?" "something bothering you?" Anyway, what to do in such cases. I've had it before and it's coming back. I hate being like that !!! Thanks for your insights. Link to post Share on other sites
MatsumeKazuo Posted November 27, 2007 Share Posted November 27, 2007 I'm wondering if your past relationship is what's making you feel this way. It's a complete mind-thing. You have to get over that. How does she react to your behavior? What makes you so insecure? Because you can't learn to fully commit to someone if you keep thinking about the bad things. Link to post Share on other sites
Author gordon_gc Posted November 27, 2007 Author Share Posted November 27, 2007 I'm wondering if your past relationship is what's making you feel this way. It's a complete mind-thing. You have to get over that. How does she react to your behavior? What makes you so insecure? Because you can't learn to fully commit to someone if you keep thinking about the bad things. I assume it's my last relationship making me this way that's why i mentionned it. At the moment, the girl reacts to my behavior by saying that everything is cool, that she's been tired (sick lately) but that she still enjoys talking to me, ect... About what makes me so insecure, I have no clue...I've been hurt because I trusted too much in the past. I know trust is the fundation of a good relationship but just lacking on that side from time to time. SERIOUSLY NO CLUE HOW TO DEAL WITH IT. Link to post Share on other sites
MatsumeKazuo Posted November 27, 2007 Share Posted November 27, 2007 I assume it's my last relationship making me this way that's why i mentionned it. At the moment, the girl reacts to my behavior by saying that everything is cool, that she's been tired (sick lately) but that she still enjoys talking to me, ect... About what makes me so insecure, I have no clue...I've been hurt because I trusted too much in the past. I know trust is the fundation of a good relationship but just lacking on that side from time to time. SERIOUSLY NO CLUE HOW TO DEAL WITH IT. This is happening in my relationship. My boyfriend trusted too much in his past relationship. And in the beginning of our relationship, I felt like I was being punished for his ex's mistakes. Right now it may seem like you're being overwhelmed, but time will pass and you will hopefully see that this girl isn't like your ex. Link to post Share on other sites
Author gordon_gc Posted November 28, 2007 Author Share Posted November 28, 2007 This is happening in my relationship. My boyfriend trusted too much in his past relationship. And in the beginning of our relationship, I felt like I was being punished for his ex's mistakes. So how did u deal with it ? Didn't you get annoy by his behavior ? was his behavior similar to mine ? I dont think i'm the jealous type...but i just like communication ! (weird to say for a guy !) Link to post Share on other sites
MatsumeKazuo Posted December 20, 2007 Share Posted December 20, 2007 At first I was mad. I would wonder why I was being punished. What did I do to deserve this? After a while I took his feelings into consideration and just tried not to think about it. But his behavior is like yours. But I did have to start thinking about what I was going to say so I didn't make him wonder or 'over think.' Link to post Share on other sites
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