alpha70 Posted December 8, 2007 Share Posted December 8, 2007 I have been talking to this woman online now for about 3 months now. At first it was very casual and we seldom exchanged emails. I eventually got her phone number and began talking by phone and texting. She is in a situation where she was/is just looking for friendship due to an abusive/jerk ex bf. She didn't think there were any good men out there. Long story short we were supposed to meet 3 consecutive Fridays, but things have come up on both our sides so it hasn't occured as of yet. This past week though she is really opening up to me and admits that she likes it. She's even hinting that she is thinking more than friends is a possibility, but we both agreed to go in with a friends first approach and to see what happens. Well, we were to meet tonight(friday) but her grandmother who was admitted to the hospital on Wednesday is now dying and she's at the hospital with family. My question is how do I approach the "being there" deal? I mean I haven't even met this girl in person, but we talk every night besides the last two since she's been with her grandma and family. I called and left a message today to ask how she was doing, etc...she finally got back to me and was rather short in our conversation. Should I call her in a couple of days and see how she is or just let her call me or txt me when she's ready? It could be a week until the funeral, etc..is all taken care of. I would love to be there for her, but it's strange cause we've never met, so perhaps I should just back off and let her contact me. If she doesn't maybe call her in a week. Thoughts? I know this is kind of dumb, but I think I could like this girl. Link to post Share on other sites
dutchie Posted December 8, 2007 Share Posted December 8, 2007 I think you should wait till she calls or texts you. She's going through a lot right now and since you have never met and have not established any kind of real relationship yet...I think it is best to just leave the ball in her court. Link to post Share on other sites
WaterTiger Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 Alpha....I'm sorry but this sounds like a scam to me. * She lives far away (So you can't actually SEE the situation) *You've never met, only talked on the phone (Never met her) *Had an abusive EX, thinks all men are crap (And YOU are going to prove her wrong!) *Had "things" come up so you couldn't meet (keeps you at a distance) *Says you might become more than a friend (Keeps you interested!) *Grandma dies (Emotional drama, brings out the "Hero" in you) *You think you really LIKE this girl... You like the girl? WHAT GIRL???? Dude! This plot reads like a movie from the Lifetime Channel! You don't know her! You've never met her! She could be a 48 year old male truck driver from North Dakota with a twisted sense of humor! Alpha, you need to step back, take a deep breath, and THINK! Have you Googled her? Do you know what she's telling you is the truth? The internet is a very dangerous place. It makes you feel instantly connected to another person which can be good or bad depending on that person. I think you should back off and wait till she contacts you. Or better yet! GET OUT OF THE DAMN HOUSE AND FIND A LOCAL GIRL!!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Lovegod Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 Long story short we were supposed to meet 3 consecutive Fridays, but things have come up on both our sides so it hasn't occured as of yet. Well, we were to meet tonight(friday) but her grandmother who was admitted to the hospital on Wednesday is now dying and she's at the hospital with family. So you got stood up a total of four times. I usually give women a "three strikes your out" rule when it comes to flaking. A woman who is truly interested in you will make excuses to spend time with you. This woman is making excuses to avoid meeting up with you. SHE IS NOT INTERESTED. Ditch her and move on. Link to post Share on other sites
blue16 Posted December 14, 2007 Share Posted December 14, 2007 Just because because you haven't met up yet doesn't mean you're out of the game. He said that there were circumstances on BOTH sides that kept them from meeting. I've had a similar thing happen to me. Met this girl through a friend...we talked online a lot and made plans about 3-4 times to meet up. Unfortunately one of us was either busy every time and the timing was off. Eventually we did get a chance to meet up and things went great! However... I've noticed that with talking with girls online, you have to meet up soon. If you wait too long to meet each other, u get stuck in the friends zone...except over the INTERNET! lol. You build up all of these ideas of what the person is like, and after a while you get used to just talking online or over the phone. It gets to the point where it would be awkward to actually see each other in real life. I'd just wait it out and let this whole grandmother thing pass over. Afterwards, ask her one more time (maybe) to hang out and if she gives some excuse...then break off contact. Link to post Share on other sites
Yamaha Posted December 14, 2007 Share Posted December 14, 2007 I would just come out and ask her your concerns. Do you really want to meet and have a friends/more relationship or have you had second thoughts? Sometimes people change their minds but don't want to tell you. Just cut to the chase and find out the truth so your not wondering. Link to post Share on other sites
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