Trialbyfire Posted December 11, 2007 Share Posted December 11, 2007 I never stated or implied that I wasn't willing to take full responsibility if it happens. All I really wanted to know is if this is something I need to let him know about. The reason I am not on the pill is because I don't want to screw up my reproductive system for when the time is right. In my family there have been many reproductive troubles and I don't want to put a hormone into my body that could adversly effect it in any way. I warned this guy before hand that I wasn't on the pill, so he knew what he was getting into. Maybe so, but it's your body. Take responsibility for it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author AugustLane Posted December 11, 2007 Author Share Posted December 11, 2007 Maybe so, but it's your body. Take responsibility for it. I'm not trying to fight with you on this, I just don't get it. I am responsible for it- I am aware of the risk, and I don't just run about having sex with anyone. We may have only been dating for a month, but I've known him for a long time. As I said earlier, if it happens, it happens. But I started this thread as a question as to whether or not I should be telling him this is going on. That's all. And I also stated that I didn't need a lecture either. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted December 11, 2007 Share Posted December 11, 2007 I'm not trying to fight with you on this, I just don't get it. I am responsible for it- I am aware of the risk, and I don't just run about having sex with anyone. We may have only been dating for a month, but I've known him for a long time. As I said earlier, if it happens, it happens. But I started this thread as a question as to whether or not I should be telling him this is going on. That's all. And I also stated that I didn't need a lecture either. I'm not fighting with you either. Where I stand is that each woman is responsible for the risks she takes when she decides to have sex. The guy, as well but understand that there are enough guys, especially early on in your relationship, who will walk away from a woman when they've had a scare. If you tell him without knowing for certain, especially when you've already taken a test that came out negative, you're in essence, telling him he's also responsible for your body. Link to post Share on other sites
corazoncito Posted December 11, 2007 Share Posted December 11, 2007 I don't think you should tell him unless you get a positive pregnancy test. You said you know exactly what day you ovulate. Do you know for sure that you ovulated when you think you did (you're taking your basal body temperature immediately upon waking every day) or are you assuming it happened when you think it did? Stress or being sick can delay your ovulation. The number of days between your ovulation day and the first day of your menstrual period is very constant in individual women (it has to do with how long your body is able to produce the hormone progesterone each cycle, which doesn't vary much between cycles and is predetermined at the moment you ovulate). So, if you ovulated later than you think you did, your period would appear to be late when it isn't. However, stressing about getting your period around the time it's due isn't likely to delay it. If you are still testing negative in a couple of days, you probably aren't pregnant. Most women who are pregnant will get at least a faint positive line 12-14 days after they ovulate. But if your period doesn't show up soon, you should see a doctor. There are other medical causes, apart from pregnancy, that can delay your period, and you might want to get those checked out. Link to post Share on other sites
roxy_1980 Posted December 11, 2007 Share Posted December 11, 2007 Just a point of order.... How can you know exactly when you ovulate, yet you only have a vague idea of when you get your period every month and track by your friend's period? If you've never tracked them yourself, how do you know for sure? Link to post Share on other sites
Author AugustLane Posted December 11, 2007 Author Share Posted December 11, 2007 I go by mucus production... Link to post Share on other sites
corazoncito Posted December 11, 2007 Share Posted December 11, 2007 That's a good secondary indicator. But if you don't temp, you don't know for certain that you O'd or when it happened. Some women dry up right before ovuation, some during ovulation, and some a day or two past ovulation. So if you're just going off of when you have mucous, you may be off by several days. Also, your body can "gear up" to ovulate (start producing mucous, even start to give dark lines on an ovulation predictor strip) but not actually go through with it. Some women's bodies "gear up" like that once or twice before actually ovulating. Link to post Share on other sites
spookie Posted December 11, 2007 Share Posted December 11, 2007 Go take another pregnancy test. Link to post Share on other sites
Author AugustLane Posted December 11, 2007 Author Share Posted December 11, 2007 I figured I would wait till Saturday to take another one. If I am, then I still will be, and if I'm not I'll trust the results more by then. Link to post Share on other sites
Lovegod Posted December 11, 2007 Share Posted December 11, 2007 Wow, this thread reeks of estrogen Link to post Share on other sites
Author AugustLane Posted December 11, 2007 Author Share Posted December 11, 2007 All you have to do is mention the word pregnant and it will stink to high hell in most places. Link to post Share on other sites
D-Lish Posted December 11, 2007 Share Posted December 11, 2007 If you're worried, take another test. If you are stressing about it, why wouldn't you talk to him about it. You obviously want to.... You're stressing because you are late- that's not the same as telling someone you think you are pregnant, or you are pregnant. Link to post Share on other sites
Author AugustLane Posted December 11, 2007 Author Share Posted December 11, 2007 I do want to tell him, but I hate making a big deal over nothing (which I have done with this thread- I know) when it isn't needed. Link to post Share on other sites
Love_Lifee Posted December 11, 2007 Share Posted December 11, 2007 yea you should. i am about two months late, and i told my boyfriend of a year, the day i missed it, the last time i had my period was sep.23 you should let him know what is going on. i took 5 pregnancy tests and they all came out negative, i also went to a doctor and took a test there, and it was still negative. i have never been irregualr.. i do not know it is a mystery to me. but you should talk to the guy. tell him you do not want to freak him out, but blah blah this is what is going on. Link to post Share on other sites
Racquel Colette Posted December 12, 2007 Share Posted December 12, 2007 If you are thirty and pregnant, take that as a blessing. The baby was meant to be, whether the father is in your life or not later. If you are pregnant, you will deal, and it will be the most wonderful blessing of your life and once it happens you will not wish it never happened, you will be praising the heavens that it happened because you will have much joy in your life. I like your attitude that you will not get rid of this wonderful life (if you are pregnant), and take it as the blessing it is if it does. Just think, if you get past 35, it will be much harder to get pregnant, this could be your only shot. Good luck! I agree with the team who says don't tell him yet. Link to post Share on other sites
Sunblast Posted December 12, 2007 Share Posted December 12, 2007 Oh no then don't tell him if he wants a kid. Definitely don't. You may need to do something later on that you'd rather he not know. Don't get him involved. Use this as the female privilege that it is. Oh my god, this forum is getting worse and worse the more I read people's responses. First some chick keeps telling people to break up and man-hate, now this one's saying to butcher a kid without even bothering to tell the father? If these are our women, our country has no hope. Link to post Share on other sites
lbj123 Posted December 12, 2007 Share Posted December 12, 2007 To be honest, I wouldn't tell him until you know for sure. If it turns out you are I think its really unfair not to tell him, but at this point, why scare someone for what may be no reason? I think you should take another test immediately though for peace of mind, and then another on Saturday of that's your plan, but agonizing over it is so much worse. As far as talking to him now about being late, it is absolutely your personal choice. I personally think of it this way, lets say I saw a weird looing birth mark and was scared it was cancerous. I'd talk to my girlfriends about it, I'd get it checked out, but until I knew for sure, I would not tell my mother, because I know it would freak her out beyond belief, and I wouldn't want her to have to go through that pain and stress if she didn't have to. I think the majority of guys will feel really freaked and scared, so why force someone to feel that if ultimately you're not pregnant? That said, you should be whatever makes you feel most confortable. Link to post Share on other sites
LovesDog Posted December 12, 2007 Share Posted December 12, 2007 Do NOT tell him. You won't get into trouble for NOT telling him, ya know? If things change, then tell him when you are positive. In other words, just wait. I had my period come late about 1 1/2 - 2 weeks and stressed over it a bit. But I was sooo glad I didn't tell the guy. Take another test in a week. Just be patient. It'll all work out. Link to post Share on other sites
Green Posted December 12, 2007 Share Posted December 12, 2007 nah dont wory him with the news of a posibly pregnancy just keep it to urself... and if you decide to abort it, just do it dont tell him. Link to post Share on other sites
Author AugustLane Posted December 13, 2007 Author Share Posted December 13, 2007 I started this morning! Yeah! Thanks for the advice everyone. I didn't tell him anything- so life goes on as normal. I figured out why I was late too. My cycle changed, I think, because I'm not on the pill my period gravitates to those around me. Looks like I switched to a new period leader. Thanks everyone! Link to post Share on other sites
blind_otter Posted December 13, 2007 Share Posted December 13, 2007 Good news. Congratulations that's a load off your mind. Now sit back and enjoy the red tide. Link to post Share on other sites
BlueEyedSarah Posted December 14, 2007 Share Posted December 14, 2007 I started this morning! Yeah! Thanks for the advice everyone. I didn't tell him anything- so life goes on as normal. I figured out why I was late too. My cycle changed, I think, because I'm not on the pill my period gravitates to those around me. Looks like I switched to a new period leader. Thanks everyone! See, there was nothing to worry about! But dont let that shouldnt stop you from using protection next time! Link to post Share on other sites
spookie Posted December 14, 2007 Share Posted December 14, 2007 See, there was nothing to worry about! But dont let that shouldnt stop you from using protection next time! Yah, and get on the pill! Why did you say you weren't on it anymore? Link to post Share on other sites
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