nashua Posted December 13, 2007 Share Posted December 13, 2007 Okay, here's the deal. I got this new job recently, and start next week. It has a business casual dress code, and I figured I was in need of an updated wardrobe. I went to banana republic today and bought $600 worth of clothes for myself! After coming home, i began to have that guilty feeling about my spending. I can't really afford the clothes...not at this moment, but I am lucky enough to have a boyfriend who has been supporting me for the last few months while I've been out of work. Still. I CANNOT AFFORD the clothes. I began to notice how often i spend on myself and not on others. Even the clerk at Banana Rep. said to me "its nice to give to yourself after giving to others for the holidays" and I was kind of a deer in headlights. I haven't the best relationship with my family, and we are not big gift givers. Most of my friends are living paycheck to paycheck, so we dont often give gifts either. I am not GIVING to anyone but myself. I feel kind of bad. Am i selfish? Link to post Share on other sites
ElvenPriestess Posted December 13, 2007 Share Posted December 13, 2007 How does your boyfriend feel about it? Have you asked him? I don't think your spending money on you and not buying other people gifts should be connected here. Christmas, was it REALLY intended to be about multitudes of presents in the first place? No. And like you say, you aren't close with your family, and your friends have an understanding with you that maybe you just exchange Christmas cards. And there is nothing wrong with that. Whenever I've changed jobs I've had to spend considerable money on a new job-wardrobe. Don't beat yourself up. If finances are a problem, just cut back. What's done is done. Be happy that you have these great clothes for this awesome new job, and just do what you need to do differently in the future. Link to post Share on other sites
Author nashua Posted December 13, 2007 Author Share Posted December 13, 2007 How does your boyfriend feel about it? Have you asked him? I don't think your spending money on you and not buying other people gifts should be connected here. Christmas, was it REALLY intended to be about multitudes of presents in the first place? No. And like you say, you aren't close with your family, and your friends have an understanding with you that maybe you just exchange Christmas cards. And there is nothing wrong with that. Whenever I've changed jobs I've had to spend considerable money on a new job-wardrobe. Don't beat yourself up. If finances are a problem, just cut back. What's done is done. Be happy that you have these great clothes for this awesome new job, and just do what you need to do differently in the future. Thanks EP Maybe it's just a case of buyers remorse?? i'm afraid to tell my boyfreid exactly how much. I told him $200 He's not happy about it. He thinks i overspend. And I do...I can admit that, but thats another post! Link to post Share on other sites
ElvenPriestess Posted December 13, 2007 Share Posted December 13, 2007 Haha, well you see you're halfway to victory. You acknowledge that you overspend. You treated yourself as a reward for a new job, and now just set cutback goals for yourself. I think you'll be fine. And if you want, you could even tell your b/f about your new goals. Link to post Share on other sites
randuff Posted December 13, 2007 Share Posted December 13, 2007 If your boyfriend has been trying to help support you lately and then you lie to him about how much you really spent....not good. Maybe take half the clothes back and feel half as guilty Link to post Share on other sites
Author nashua Posted December 13, 2007 Author Share Posted December 13, 2007 If your boyfriend has been trying to help support you lately and then you lie to him about how much you really spent....not good. Maybe take half the clothes back and feel half as guilty maybe thats a good idea! I feel terrible lying to him about it. He's not actually paying for these clothes. i put it on my banana republic Credit card, and i will be paying for them...eventually. I start the new job in a week, so I'll FINALLY have some funds coming in. Its just that my boyfriend is so smart about money, which is why i lied to him because he would think i was INSANE to drop that much on clothes. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted December 13, 2007 Share Posted December 13, 2007 If your boyfriend has been trying to help support you lately and then you lie to him about how much you really spent....not good. Maybe take half the clothes back and feel half as guilty I agree, although I think she should take them all back. Credit card debit interest is ridiculously high. Link to post Share on other sites
ElvenPriestess Posted December 14, 2007 Share Posted December 14, 2007 I don't think taking all of it back is necessary, it is for a good cause after all. A new job means new wardrobe standards means buying new things. But perhaps picking the favorites from the second favorites, and taking back the second favorites? And at least she's going to be paying it off out of her own pocket soon. Link to post Share on other sites
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