kkthxbye Posted December 19, 2007 Share Posted December 19, 2007 There, there KK <very gentling patting on over-burdened back>. I will help you. I am starting a fund to help you relieve yourself of this evil breast...er, beast. Please donate at NoMoreBoobs4KK.org. Yer SO welcome ROFL!!!!! You rock my sox!! Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted December 19, 2007 Share Posted December 19, 2007 So I should try to reverse improve myself and try to behave worse than I do know just because most other people behave that way? So...what makes you so special that you need to be placed on a pedestal, above all? Link to post Share on other sites
kkthxbye Posted December 19, 2007 Share Posted December 19, 2007 As I said before, but somehow everyone can hear me. I don't care about cashiers or other women, breasts or no breasts. My point was not if there attractive women exist, but how my H reacts to them. I feel pretty much the same when other men look at me. By the way miss cashier, how much did you boobs cost? They were free, a gift from God I'm told. Natural, and I'm married to a man who isn't a boob guy, so there is the raw humor of mother nature. But I have had so many situations that would make you really turn red, in regards to having to deal with horny men. Now being 5 feet tall, they have to really stoop down to stare, so its VERY obvious, and I have had my share of wives just give me hell like its my fault. You simply have to laugh, what can you do? its not worth it. You seem to be getting very defensive, and I can understand that people are flaming you and feeling like you're not getting heard. This was my pale attempt at trying to lighten the situation, and it didn't even warrant a chuckle out of you so I am volunteering my way out of this thread, you seem to be looking for answers that we can't give you? If this were me, I would have the "respect" talk with my husband. It comes down to his mannerisms hurting you. And bottom line, we shouldn't hurt the ones we love. If he refuses to work on his behavior, and you can't live with this disrespect (of which it is disrespectful IMO) then what bridge do you have left to cross? Unless you can change the world in a day, and get all this nonsense about oogling and drooling to stop, you have to learn to deal with it, with a cool head and warm heart. Its up to him after you let him know how you feel. Link to post Share on other sites
Author morelaugh Posted December 19, 2007 Author Share Posted December 19, 2007 So...what makes you so special that you need to be placed on a pedestal, above all? Those were your words (and thoughts), Please don't try to put them in my mouth. I don't want to be put on the pedestal. I want to be valued for real values, not for the shape of my legs. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted December 19, 2007 Share Posted December 19, 2007 Those were your words (and thoughts), Please don't try to put them in my mouth. I don't want to be put on the pedestal. I want to be valued for real values, not for the shape of my legs. No, morelaugh, that's not your issue at all. You want to be put above all other women, on a pedestal, which is why you have issues with your SO looking at other women. You see yourself as a superior being, not as someone who wants to be valued for more than her looks. Get some therapy. For your own good, the good of your marriage and before you drive your SO away. Link to post Share on other sites
Author morelaugh Posted December 19, 2007 Author Share Posted December 19, 2007 No, morelaugh, that's not your issue at all. You want to be put above all other women, on a pedestal, which is why you have issues with your SO looking at other women. You see yourself as a superior being, not as someone who wants to be valued for more than her looks. Get some therapy. For your own good, the good of your marriage and before you drive your SO away. You claim that you know better than I do what I want. And than you claim that I’m the one who feels superior? Link to post Share on other sites
silktricks Posted December 19, 2007 Share Posted December 19, 2007 I don't want to be put on the pedestal. I want to be valued for real values, not for the shape of my legs. But all values are real values - including the shape of ones legs. Do you dress well? Do you style your hair, wear makeup, take baths, iron your clothes? All of those things are only surface things, but they also reflect things about you. Some women have large breasts, or small waist, or long legs, or beautiful eyes. Some women have sharp intellect. Some women are fast runners or good swimmers. All of those things come at least somewhat from the genetic package we have received from our parents. To say that any of those things (including large breasts) are not "real values" is just as demeaning to women who have them as you possibly feel about abut having some of your attributes discounted. The important thing IMO is not really what we are valued for, but how we are valued by our SO, and how we value both ourselves and our SO. Be proud of your attributes, but let other women be proud of theirs as well. If your SO looks at women with large breasts, and it bothers you, then discuss it with him. I'm not saying that there aren't some women out there who flaunt their physical attributes at men, attempting to provoke reaction - because there are. But most of the time the effect is lost if the men don't react . Link to post Share on other sites
Virgo1982 Posted December 19, 2007 Share Posted December 19, 2007 But all values are real values - including the shape of ones legs. Do you dress well? Do you style your hair, wear makeup, take baths, iron your clothes? All of those things are only surface things, but they also reflect things about you. Some women have large breasts, or small waist, or long legs, or beautiful eyes. Some women have sharp intellect. Some women are fast runners or good swimmers. All of those things come at least somewhat from the genetic package we have received from our parents. To say that any of those things (including large breasts) are not "real values" is just as demeaning to women who have them as you possibly feel about abut having some of your attributes discounted. This is a point I made yesterday. Now, if we completely ignore self-esteem as an issue, we're left wondering what this anger and frustration is accomplishing. Perhaps what you need is a SO like JackJack who shares your views on appreciating attractive females with respect. You can't change the world. So, what are you going to do? If everyone were the same...oh, who cares? Everyone is not the same. We can't change the world to fit our needs. So, that is why most women ignore or participate. If you can't beat em, join em or leave em. Maybe you could use your intellect, education, professionalism, and high self-esteem to round up a group of women to live on an island where they are in control and men who look at women because they are attracted to them are stoned to death. Maybe instead of doing that, women should be required to cover everything but their eyes so that men won't have a reason to drool over them. Maybe these solutions are a bit over-the-top and we just need to accept the things we can not control. And maybe all we can control is who we decide to be vulnerable to and what gets under our skin. Link to post Share on other sites
Ronni_W Posted December 20, 2007 Share Posted December 20, 2007 I just had an epiphany moment. This is real, honest to God jealousy, TBF, that's *exactly* right! OP is trying to justify her jealousy 89 ways to Sunday by proclaiming it to be the polar opposite of jealousy. Sad, really. Link to post Share on other sites
Curmudgeon Posted December 20, 2007 Share Posted December 20, 2007 I don't want to be put on the pedestal. I want to be valued for real values, not for the shape of my legs. If two women were completely equal intellectually, spiritually, educationally, professionally and in measurable intelligence; both were equally attractive, had equally pleasing personalities and there were no other unequal factors to consider then the one with the best legs would likely "win." Is there something wrong or shallow about that? Link to post Share on other sites
Virgo1982 Posted December 20, 2007 Share Posted December 20, 2007 If two women were completely equal intellectually, spiritually, educationally, professionally and in measurable intelligence; both were equally attractive, had equally pleasing personalities and there were no other unequal factors to consider then the one with the best legs would likely "win." Is there something wrong or shallow about that? Let me answer on the OP's behalf...Yes! Furthermore, it doesn't matter what you say. Once you committ to someone, you can not possibly see any other person as being attractive. And if you think that woman has better legs than your SO, that is considered betrayal. You must think her legs are more-or equally-attractive simply because you made a committment to her. *Note:OP having an identical twin would make the situation a little complicated. Though her twin would probably not be as smart, professional, etc. So, nevermind... Link to post Share on other sites
silktricks Posted December 20, 2007 Share Posted December 20, 2007 Let me answer on the OP's behalf...Yes! Furthermore, it doesn't matter what you say. Once you committ to someone, you can not possibly see any other person as being attractive. And if you think that woman has better legs than your SO, that is considered betrayal. You must think her legs are more-or equally-attractive simply because you made a committment to her. *Note:OP having an identical twin would make the situation a little complicated. Though her twin would probably not be as smart, professional, etc. So, nevermind... Are you being sarcastic? (Gawd, I hope so!) Link to post Share on other sites
Virgo1982 Posted December 20, 2007 Share Posted December 20, 2007 Are you being sarcastic? (Gawd, I hope so!) Quite This thread is amazingly ironic to me. I've never heard someone with such education, intelligence, and healthy self-esteem speak on this topic in this way. Ever. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted December 20, 2007 Share Posted December 20, 2007 TBF, that's *exactly* right! OP is trying to justify her jealousy 89 ways to Sunday by proclaiming it to be the polar opposite of jealousy. Sad, really. I kenna understand this. A reasonable adult would own their own issues and if they couldn't handle them, look to a professional for help. Link to post Share on other sites
Curmudgeon Posted December 20, 2007 Share Posted December 20, 2007 Quite This thread is amazingly ironic to me. I've never heard someone with such education, intelligence, and healthy self-esteem speak on this topic in this way. Ever. Disclaimer: Any selection criteria employed would be only during the evaluation process and would expire absolutely upon the offering and acceptance of a full commitment! Link to post Share on other sites
underpants Posted December 20, 2007 Share Posted December 20, 2007 Oh my, I have been conducting a quiet twin study for a little over 10 years now. I have a theory but time will tell. Link to post Share on other sites
Virgo1982 Posted December 20, 2007 Share Posted December 20, 2007 Disclaimer: Any selection criteria employed would be only during the evaluation process and would expire absolutely upon the offering and acceptance of a full commitment! As I'm sure her SO never expected to see this side of the OP Poor thing... I guess Mrs. Dandy Long Legs will be his new SO. A new thread coming soon... Link to post Share on other sites
Ronni_W Posted December 20, 2007 Share Posted December 20, 2007 I kenna understand this. A reasonable adult would own their own issues and if they couldn't handle them, look to a professional for help. Yes, indeed -- that is what I find so sad...there IS help available but not without ownership of the prob. And without help, chances of emotionally intimate and mutually rewarding relationships are slim. Link to post Share on other sites
Ariadne Posted December 20, 2007 Share Posted December 20, 2007 As I'm sure her SO never expected to see this side of the OP Poor thing... I guess Mrs. Dandy Long Legs will be his new SO. A new thread coming soon... (she is probably bat ugly) Ariadne Link to post Share on other sites
Author morelaugh Posted December 20, 2007 Author Share Posted December 20, 2007 God, this thread is sooo full of good intentions!! You gang up against different opinion. Does that help you feel superior and powerfull? Talking about proverbial stoning from one of the previous posts... Link to post Share on other sites
Author morelaugh Posted December 20, 2007 Author Share Posted December 20, 2007 (she is probably bat ugly) Ariadne Especially this! How nice! Are you trying to prove my point? Link to post Share on other sites
Virgo1982 Posted December 20, 2007 Share Posted December 20, 2007 You're just so passionate about something you can not control. And you're so defensive about it. You hardly acknowledge those that agree with you. You simply address those that don't. And it's also annoying that you don't see that this is your problem. If you love your SO, you might find comfort in the fact that many of us here pity him. And if you love him, you might be willing to look inside yourself... Please read: http://www.kevinfitzmaurice.com/response_mature_level.htm Link to post Share on other sites
Author morelaugh Posted December 20, 2007 Author Share Posted December 20, 2007 You hardly acknowledge those that agree with you. You simply address those that don't. Ouch! You are right about this! I’d like to apologise to all of them. Sorry guys – I let your good intentions and the way of thinking I can totally relate to ,go unacknowledged. I’ll try to blame it on how busy I am... No, seriously : I am really sorry! Link to post Share on other sites
MrsHellnoFire Posted December 26, 2007 Share Posted December 26, 2007 Sorry, but I've NEVER wasted my time being jealous of another woman. Why? It's pathetic and if my husband wanted someone else, I'd let them go. SIMPLE! My time is too valuable to be wasted in hatred and/or anger, jealousy etc over other women! If you thought you were TRULY better than another woman, it wouldn't bother you so much! Your jealousy makes your hubby think that this other person has more value than you and that entices him more anyways! Link to post Share on other sites
MrsHellnoFire Posted December 26, 2007 Share Posted December 26, 2007 Is that really your opinion? If a man gets off to a repulsive sleazy porn star that means he is not worth a serious meaningful relationship? Ever. So what is keeping you in this realtionship then? You are competing with a fictional porn character- it's pathetic! Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts