ABrokenWing Posted December 18, 2007 Share Posted December 18, 2007 When you aren't into the bar scene? Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted December 18, 2007 Share Posted December 18, 2007 Church is good. Link to post Share on other sites
truckdriving Posted December 20, 2007 Share Posted December 20, 2007 Church is definitely a good place. There you can meet people who have similiar beliefs and morals. A college bible study group is where you can meet people your age Link to post Share on other sites
noclue_questionmark Posted December 20, 2007 Share Posted December 20, 2007 I just go take classes at school, usually it's filled with 18 year olds but there's always those few 30+, but if you take a class you like like cooking or art or photography, it's still a good way to spend time. Link to post Share on other sites
dreaming4ever Posted December 24, 2007 Share Posted December 24, 2007 I wish I knew the answer to this question....I was actually asking a friend the same thing today. I am recently single again and so now I keep asking people where they met their gfs or bfs because I just don't like to go to bars or clubs at all....and sorry, not church either....so where am I going to find someone besides at my jobs? I just don't know.... Link to post Share on other sites
Enema Posted December 24, 2007 Share Posted December 24, 2007 Take up a sport. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ABrokenWing Posted December 28, 2007 Author Share Posted December 28, 2007 Church is definitely a good place. There you can meet people who have similiar beliefs and morals. A college bible study group is where you can meet people your age while I consider myself religious, I don't attend church regularly. And back when I did, I don't remember there being any groups for ppl in their 20's. I'm from a really small town and there just isn't much to do here besides go to bars, and bars make me somewhat uncomfortable. Link to post Share on other sites
Kamille Posted December 28, 2007 Share Posted December 28, 2007 What kind of job do you have? What are the opportunities for meeting people there? Link to post Share on other sites
Author ABrokenWing Posted December 28, 2007 Author Share Posted December 28, 2007 What kind of job do you have? What are the opportunities for meeting people there? Sadly, not really. I work in accounting and have for the last 10 years. I'm the youngest of 6 other people, only one man in the office, and he's older, and married. There is always clients and I try to strike up convo's with them but it always starts and ends at the office. Link to post Share on other sites
My_Other_I Posted December 28, 2007 Share Posted December 28, 2007 Funny, I have been thinking the same thing for a while now. I'm somewhat shy in public so it is hard for me to approach people. The only thing I can think of for you is to join a team sport. Link to post Share on other sites
KindAth86 Posted December 29, 2007 Share Posted December 29, 2007 I am about to move to a new city as a 20-something, so I can feel where you're coming from. One really great way to meet kind and moral people is through community service. Find a soup kitchen, Habitat for Humanity office, or humane society shelter near you and try to volunteer every week. You meet great people, and you end up with a sense of accomplishment after each session. Another excellent place to meet new people, I hear, is at concerts! People who enjoy the same type of music generally have similar beliefs. I don't think you'll meet many prim-and-proper girls at a heavy metal concert, for example. And the relaxed atmosphere is conducive to starting up conversations. I think that the key to meeting people is to do what you like IN A PUBLIC FORUM. If you like sports, join an adult league! If you like cars, join a local club! When I move, I'll be looking to take basic art classes and join book discussions, since I'm interested in the type of person who would engage in such activities. Good luck! Link to post Share on other sites
mikeraw Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 I just moved to Houston, TX and I had a hard time meeting nice girls. Notice how I emphasized the word 'nice'. Since I hardly knew people, I went out to bars and clubs literally every night of the week. Yeah, you get good at flirting and getting laid, but it's very unfulfilling... I actually asked the same question as you in another forum on this same website... Never really got good, concrete answers... Everyone always says CHURCH and trust me, there are groups of all ages. Even if you don't see people your age at those meetings, they have their own acquaintances that they bring to those meetings every once in a while or to other events like picnics... I go to MUSEUMS and whenever I work up the guts to talk to chicks I end up meeting up with them later on. Man, but it takes guts when you're sober... and I'm 27, not exactly an immature kid. My personal favorite is going to musical events... OPERA is my favorite. I'm a total nerd and totally dig classical music. I've played piano for over 20 yrs, so I can strike up convos with musical girls. The good thing about operas is that they serve alcohol before the event and during the intermission. Also, everyone is dressed in their Sunday best so you feel comfortable with yourself and the girls just look gorgeous... And if you go to musical events put together by universities, it's usually full of young people, so you can always strike up a convo with them. If you need guts, then sneak a flask of whisky and go at it during the event. hahaha. Also, I think this works at MUSICALS and THEATER. Not my cup of tea, though. Everyone always suggests COFFEE SHOPS and BOOKSTORES... and those places are just great to meet people. Go to your favorite section and since most new Barnes and Nobles already have a Starbucks in them, you can always suggest a cup of coffee or a sandwhich or something right there. And lastly, just be friendly to everyone everywhere. This one is hard, especially for people like me because I hate people in general, but man, it works. Just talk to everyone you come across... supermarket cashiers, bank tellers, restaurant staff, sales reps over the phone... I wish I could provide you with a better list, but the truth is that there's no good formula or a perfect place where you can meet people. It took me a while to come to terms to that, but trust me, there is NO MAGICAL PLACE out there to meet people. Oh, also, I replied to your post assuming you're a guy. If you're a chick, then go to the places I named. I'm just curious why you don't like bars, though... Do you not drink? Are you super shy? Do you hate people in general? Link to post Share on other sites
Green Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 yeah it takes guts to put yourself out their and get into relationships Link to post Share on other sites
wergo Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 yeah it takes guts to put yourself out their and get into relationships It would be a wonderful world if women saw guys who approach them in public as having guts or being brave or taking initiative or even just see it as flattering, but the reality is that they mainly find it obnoxious and slightly offensive (at the very least; socially inappropriate) and wish guys would just leave them alone and mind their own business. Link to post Share on other sites
Kamille Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 It would be a wonderful world if women saw guys who approach them in public as having guts or being brave or taking initiative or even just see it as flattering, but the reality is that they mainly find it obnoxious and slightly offensive (at the very least; socially inappropriate) and wish guys would just leave them alone and mind their own business. I don't agree. Sometimes I find it annoying sometimes I enjoy it. It all depends on what mood I'm in - and gaging mood is probably the trick here. Sometimes I go to the museum because I'm bored and lonely (usually a good time to approach), other times because I'm upset and want to focus on something other then whatever is upsetting me. I think the trick is to smile first and only approach women who smile back. If you can't catch my eyes long enough to make me smile, then I'm not in a mood to chat. Link to post Share on other sites
wergo Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 Sometimes I go to the museum because I'm bored and lonely (usually a good time to approach), other times because I'm upset and want to focus on something other then whatever is upsetting me. I think the trick is to smile first and only approach women who smile back. If you can't catch my eyes long enough to make me smile, then I'm not in a mood to chat. So, it's still entirely up to the woman? It doesn't matter how much he might want to meet her or get to know her, if she isn't there hoping to be approached and doesn't give him the green light, there's really nothing he can do? He can be as brave as he likes, but if she's not interested, any courage he shows is just gonna be seen in a negative light? That's depressing. Link to post Share on other sites
Kamille Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 So, it's still entirely up to the woman? It doesn't matter how much he might want to meet her or get to know her, if she isn't there hoping to be approached and doesn't give him the green light, there's really nothing he can do? He can be as brave as he likes, but if she's not interested, any courage he shows is just gonna be seen in a negative light? That's depressing. Well this just makes me wonder... Do you feel like talking to strangers every time you're out and about running errands? I think of it in terms of two people being on the same wavelenght and running into each other. As in, I used to go around catching men's eyes, when I was up to it. I beleive that yes, it is easier for women to approach men but the dynamics are the same on both sides. Courage has nothing to do with it. I don't have to drop my preoccupations everytime a man approaches me just to congratulate him on how courageous he is by commenting on my skirt. (Said comment begot the gentleman a glare). Being sensitive of people's mood and attitude is key. Link to post Share on other sites
Green Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 So, it's still entirely up to the woman? It doesn't matter how much he might want to meet her or get to know her, if she isn't there hoping to be approached and doesn't give him the green light, there's really nothing he can do? He can be as brave as he likes, but if she's not interested, any courage he shows is just gonna be seen in a negative light? That's depressing. dont worry about the courage or if they like you. Don't put find value in yourself through the eyes of others. A wise mand understands the things around him. An enlightened man understands himself Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts