do girls hate guys that are to nice

[halfarock]

I don’t think it is at all that women dislike nice guys. Rather a guy will be physically unattractive, have horrible social skills, and have nothing interesting to say. He’ll keep thinking, “I don’t know why she doesn’t like me, I ‘m such a nice guy.” And then, not to hurt his feelings, she will say to him, “You’re a nice guy and all but I’m just not attracted to you.” It has nothing to do with being nice or not.

 

I’m a nice guy. I’m sure every woman who I’ve ever known will tell you that I’m a nice guy, but I’ve never had a woman reject me because I was nice.

 

Those guys like lovegod that thinks they have to be an ********* every now and then tend to be limited. If you have interesting things to say and are creative, nice never gets boring whereas having to play the stupid game lovegod advocates gets annoying really quick. I guess that is why guys like him don’t give a damn, it make it easier to just run away when their game gets old.

[halfarock]

Then we get ****loads of posts here of men saying "How do I tell this girl I like how I feel" and "I told her how I feel and she became distant".

 

But it is because the woman was never attracted to him in the first place. Think about this, man or woman, if someone approaches you and tells you that they are madly in love with you but you are not at all attracted, or at least not nearly as attracted as your wannabe suitor; wouldn’t you want to distance yourself from that person so as not to give them any false hope. That is what is at play here.

 

If you met the man/woman of your dreams and he/she told you that he/she thought that you were the most wonderful person that he/she had ever met, would you then distance yourself? I think not.

[Kenyth]

I think we're all trying to say the same basic things here. We're just coming at them from different angles because the terminology is so subjective.

 

So many men think it's just about doing the things the woman wants you to do and letting here do whatever she wants that makes her want you. Being confident, competent, and taking care of yourself is what you should be after. She's looking at the core person, the big picture, the whole package. You don't have to have everything, but you have to have something. Attitude, confidence, and personality are some of the easier things to change, and so are the prime targets for quick improvement. You can work on things like looks and career as time allows.

 

The reason some say "faking it" works is because by "faking it" you are trying to change your behavior. That's how you learn, making changes to your behavior that aren't normal and seeing how people react to them. It's not "faking" if you truly want to change, and you're not going to change by staying in your comfort zone. You've gotta take chances and risk embarrassment. You've got to handle rejection without falling apart. You've got to be comfortable and display servicable wit interacting with groups of people. You've got to learn to handle your mistakes and social missteps with dignity and good humor. You have to know when to get angry and when to agressively seek what you're entitled to. You have to be willing to compete even if you'll lose.

 

Women want a champ, not a chump.