bserious2012 Posted December 20, 2007 Share Posted December 20, 2007 I just started talking on the phone to this guy I met through craigslist. Of course, he has a horror story about why his relationship with his baby's mother didn't work out. She was immature, duh! He's 31 and he's ready to settle down into a LTR. We just spent the last few hours talking on the phone and we've been sending rapid emails for the past 3 days. The whole conversation was amazing, its like I was talking to myself. We've got the same personality, except he's a guy and we share the same birthday. GREAT RIGHT! What I think is romantic, he thinks is romantic. He wants to take it slow and has no problem with my celibacy because he hasn't had any in months, although he's extremely well-endowed. Everything sounds perfect, so why am I online trying to look up dirt at one of those ex-bashing sites. BECAUSE...he's to perfect! And he has ties to the same community I just moved away from while trying to escape the biggest heartbreak of my life. We shared our relationship history and he seemed to know my story well, Could he possibly know my heartbreaker? am I paranoid? We live about 20 minutes from each other and he says we should get together and see what happens, I'm all for it, so why am I trying to find something wrong with Mr. Right??? Link to post Share on other sites
Legend Posted December 20, 2007 Share Posted December 20, 2007 When something seems too good to be true, it usually is. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted December 20, 2007 Share Posted December 20, 2007 his baby's mother Did he refer to her as such? If so, it's a big, red flag. Baby momma drama is always something to watch out for... Link to post Share on other sites
Elyssa Posted December 20, 2007 Share Posted December 20, 2007 As the saying goes... if something is too good to be true, it is. I could be wrong but it sounds to me like he's just trying to look perfect to you. Come on, the same birthday? Sounds unlikely. I'd advise extreme caution meeting this one in person... and try to get more specific information to see whether he's telling the truth regarding having ties to the place you used to live at. He could be a creep or he could be Mr. Right, but caution is always a good policy. -E Link to post Share on other sites
Author bserious2012 Posted December 20, 2007 Author Share Posted December 20, 2007 No, he didn't call her his baby's mother. He said his ex and he said the only reason they stayed together so long, 5 years, was because of the baby. He said the relationship was all about sex and it was never going to be marriage or anything but when she got pregnant they tried to make it work. The child is only 2 though so it does seem strange that he was unhappy just having sex a few times a week but stayed in the relationship long enough to get her pregnant. I just moved from LA and he used to live there but still works there. This is information he gave before we even started talking about my former relationships. Also, I only told him my birth month and then he came through with his date and month, which happened to be the same as mine. It is mighty strange! I don't want to be stupid and get dooped but I also don't want to be scary and miss out. I can't see any reason why someone might want to go through all this trouble. I don't plan on meeting him until at least January, a masked murder would get bored by then right? I also feel like maybe I'm not even ready if he is Mr. Right, because the first thing that popped in my head was...maybe he knows my ex. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted December 20, 2007 Share Posted December 20, 2007 The only way you're going to find out what he's all about, is to meet him in person. Why not get together in public places (coffeeshops and restaurants) for awhile and find out if he's for real? Link to post Share on other sites
Krytie TV Posted December 20, 2007 Share Posted December 20, 2007 If he's making it a point to tell you how well-endowed he is, this guy has a lot of issues. Never in my life has the size of my dick come up before we reached the physical stage. He must be trying to make up for shortcomings, or may be lying to reel you in. At any rate, proceed with caution. Usually, these guys that pour it on in the beginning turn it off very quickly after they get what they want. Link to post Share on other sites
underpants Posted December 20, 2007 Share Posted December 20, 2007 Look him up in the county records. Some are online, but it might be worth a drive. Look up criminal and civil. Link to post Share on other sites
Jilly Bean Posted December 20, 2007 Share Posted December 20, 2007 If he's making it a point to tell you how well-endowed he is, this guy has a lot of issues. Never in my life has the size of my dick come up before we reached the physical stage. He must be trying to make up for shortcomings, or may be lying to reel you in. At any rate, proceed with caution. Usually, these guys that pour it on in the beginning turn it off very quickly after they get what they want. Totally agree. I guess everyone has their own version of Mr. Right - I just know mine wouldn't be telling me about his huge cock in advance of meeting. Not to mention meeting him off craigslist should be a huge flag, too... Link to post Share on other sites
Author bserious2012 Posted December 20, 2007 Author Share Posted December 20, 2007 Yes, everyone does have their own version, mine will be well equipped down stairs. Not saying that he is my mister right though. As far as craigslist is concerned it has just as many (fill in blank) men as any bar, club, or college party I might have met him at. And the nature of the site allows for numerous "let's **** tonight" posts. I made it clear that's not what I'm looking for and he let me know that's not what he wants. He could be lying, but so could I;). I am a little worried about all the red flags though, although i appreciate the information it was a lot to share. I'm not sure how I should take it. I mean everyone is always talking about be upfront about what you want, so is it wrong that he tells me about himself and what he wants. We ended up on marriage and kids, and lifestyle and parenting styles because I asked if he had any. Good thing, since he does! Isn't that the equivalent to finding out if someone is a graduate or works at Dennys? Don't you ask what do you do because you want to know if you'll be taking the bus for every date? So finding out that he'd like to be married and possibly have another child before he needs Viagra isn't wrong is it? These red flags are to warn us right, so I'll be on the look out. But I think I'll take T.B.F.'s advice and take it slow because I'm sure I have my own red flags flying in the wind but I still would like someone to give me a shot. We said if nothing else we could be good friends and since our personalities are so close I believe it, hopefully I won't be posting a horror story soon. Link to post Share on other sites
lovelorcet Posted December 20, 2007 Share Posted December 20, 2007 He wants to take it slow and has no problem with my celibacy because he hasn't had any in months, although he's extremely well-endowed. That has to be the dumbest thing I have read in a while. Link to post Share on other sites
Author bserious2012 Posted December 21, 2007 Author Share Posted December 21, 2007 what's so dumb about it? Link to post Share on other sites
maynicholas Posted December 21, 2007 Share Posted December 21, 2007 Because how would well endowed get worked into the conversation? Especially if you said you were celibate? Sounds to me like he is looking for a lay... Link to post Share on other sites
Dynamo Posted December 21, 2007 Share Posted December 21, 2007 I agree, something is DEFINITELY fishy with him telling you how "well endowed" he is.. Link to post Share on other sites
D-Lish Posted December 21, 2007 Share Posted December 21, 2007 There are some things I have learned about meeting people online... It's rare people turn out to be exactly as they present themselves. Just like any new relationship or friendship, people are on their best behavior. It's even easier to be on your best behavior when you are only talking in cyber space. Of course, I am on my best behavior too. I have gotten introduction messages from guys saying- "hey baby, interested in a good 9 inches".... Ummmm, no- delete. It's hard to trust your gut when you haven't met yet. I'd say it's at least worth a meeting in a public place to figure that out. I have had someone mention to me that they have a huge weiner- only to giggle upon the sight of it. He may be flaunting this card out of insecurity, or for lack of social skills. Who knows why he mentioned that- it depends how the topic came up. Just be careful and keep your guard up like you would with any other situation. What is Craig's list??? An intimate encounter site??? I will have to google. The internet has brought about a whole new slew of crazy situations. I had someone see me on facebook, then gather my personal info from my page and stalk me. Yes, I had to get a restraining order because he showed up at my doorstep, got my first and last name and called my house. All he had to do was see my first and last name, my city and boom- he 411'd me and had my name and address. I didn't realize my profile was so open to the public and that I had to take measures to lock down my security so only people I allow to see me could actually see my page. And yes, a crazy person could and would wait until January. Link to post Share on other sites
Author bserious2012 Posted December 21, 2007 Author Share Posted December 21, 2007 D-Lish, thanks for the advice I could actually use. I'm sure the other posters meant to answer my questions and give me some advice I could use (yeah f%$*!#g right!) but they just didn't know how. I really wanted to get some advice on how much attention I should be paying to those "red flags" everyone is always talking about. I mean if we all paid attention to them instead of giving people opportunities to grow past whatever emotional obstacles they may have everyone would be single. Its cool though because I am actively seeking a meaningful relationship and that means I'm dating. I'm meeting new people on and offline and I've already got a date planned with someone else. So its relevant for me to ask how much leeway is necessary with the red flags, besides I'm not too upset about knowing his size. Him telling me automatically made me think, he must be really small or something else is wrong but its just another thing that may or may not disqualify him as a relationship candidate. Thanks everyone! Link to post Share on other sites
EYECANDY000 Posted December 24, 2007 Share Posted December 24, 2007 Things always seems to good to be true in the beginning, if you ask me.. and as you get to know someone more and be around them . then thats when the real them show.. In the beginning you are meeting their representative!!! Link to post Share on other sites
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