Advice on something.......

[yagottahelp]

Hello, I was wondering if anyone had any ideas to show my gf that I don't mind if she has friends that are guys. She seems to have this in her mind that i always get upset when she has a guy friend. I have told her that I trust her and it's totally fine with me.......

 

She seems to think i'm going to get mad if she goes and hangs out with them or something, although I don't ever remember doing so.......

 

Well now see here's the thing, we've kind of broken up for whatever reason, she is still attracted to me and we hangout everyday, we even hug and cuddle and stuff- call this a break to clear her head from her move and stuff, beats the heck outta me, that's another story, well i am not so ssecure right now because of us- so of course i kind of jump at stuff.

 

Well just so happens there's this guy, who in my heart deep down i know he's not a threat, yet my mind of course is suspicious of maybe a close guy friend now-but i know if she thinks i won't let her or don't want her to have male aqquaintences, she'll probably pick her freedom to grtow and have friends (we're both 20) over a relationship.

 

When i asked her about the guy she toptally denies anything, and asks "why I feel insecure because she hasn't ever done anything to make me feel like that, so I shouldn't-" and she's right, she never has-but my mind just wanders sometimes, i think that's natural when you don't feel secure.

 

So other than not questioning her about a guy in this hard time for us, and maybe being encouraging if she talks about a friend that's a guy, any ideas on how i can show her i trust her, love her, and really truly don't mind her friendship with guys???????

[NEONINK]

Cooling it off with you isn't making you more secure either though.

 

Sounds a little like manipulation. And I should know. I've heard this same crap.

 

Instead of asking her how she feels about other guys, ask her how she feels about YOU! Forget the other guys, your life and emotional state is about you.