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my bf's best friend is his ex gf... ..


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confuzedgurl

ok so here's the story...my bf broke up wit his ex gf not long ago. and he told me tat he really did love her but she wanted to break up for no reason...and i never had a bf before so i don know wat to do. cuz i asked him bout his past gf's and he said he had 13 of em, my friends are worried cuz they say it's not good but he tells me he loves only me...and i believe him cuz it's seems soo real... and lately we have been in an arguement and he said he was gonna change but in a bad way...like he said he wont care anymore and i think it's my fault. i said sorry though and he was like...it doesnt cut it. so the next day, i was talkin to him on msn but he seemed different...like distracted cuz his reply were really late and he went offline in the mornin. he called me at 5 i think and from behind i heard lots of girls gigglin and i think they were listenin to wat i was sayin on the phone as well. i asked him where he went and he said he went to this girl's house---for almost the WHOLE DAY!!!!!----not to metion ...this girl used to like him but i still think it's possible..he has LOTS of female friends btw.AND I GET JEALOUS....not wit all the girls he's around....only the ones he had\hads past feelings wit. like...i dont say anything...when he's wit his ex gf i go somewhere else with other friends...he doesnt seem to care if im there or not...and he spents alot of time wit other girls especially his ex's and i try not to spend time with my guyfriends for him but i dont think he cares bout me anymore...i dont know...am i bein to jealous??? should i give him some space??? what should do???

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No, you are not being jealous. Of course you feel insecure. He's treating you in a way that would make anyone doubt themselves. He is your first boyfriend so you haven't experienced these emotions before and you do not know how to set healthy boundaries.

 

For me: if you have a recent ex, if we have agreed to be exclusive, it's quite simple. Does he know about me? If you want to hang out, can I come and be included too? The answer to those questions had better be YES, otherwise I'm going to walk away.

 

In fact, that holds for more than recent ex's. Any ex. If a girl is friends I expect to be include. It's not a demand, just an expectation, and in healthy relationships, your partner treats you that way. They make you feel visible and they make their friendships transparent.

 

How old are you by the way?

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confuzedgurl

well....my mom tell me im too young for this but im 15....but he tells me im the one and i feel loved and stuff.... as a child, i was neglected cuz my parents got divorced and i even had suicidal thoughts as a kid.....my mom thinks that is the reason i want a bf...she thinks i just want so love my father never gave.....i dont know...

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I'm sorry, sweets. At 15, you have involved yourself with a player, and you're starting to see how hard it is to date a guy like that because he always has other girls to hang with and be with and to screw around with and he doesn't LOVE any of them. He LOVES only himself, and he's out to get whatever he can to make himself happy.

 

13 exes, huh? Why do you think he has that many? It's not because he knows ANYTHING about LOVE. He just likes girls and likes playing with as many as he can get.

 

Save your love for someone who is into YOU and you only.

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he broke up wit me....it doesnt matter anymore...

 

You may not see it right now, but that's the BEST thing that could have happened to you.

 

I hope once you get past your hurt that you will be able to learn something from this - how to recognize a loser guy and stay far, far away from him instead of falling for the player.

 

Look around for the shy guy who's always smiling at you but doesn't have quite enough nerve to start a conversation and ask you out. He's probably a hell of a lot more interesting (and actually INTERESTED in who YOU are) and will treat you like a princess rather than one of the harem.

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confuzedgurl

u rite...i just realized today...he left me for someone else... he stopped talkin to me and acted like a jerk to me but on facebook, he's so nice to this other girl. im glad i didnt stay wit him anylonger. i want him outta my life FAST!! but wat else should i do, i deleted his number on my cell... im not that heartless where i'll block him on msn or facebook....but should i?

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