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An old friend just recently came to visit me. He asked me if I knew how much he liked me, and asked me if I would ever date him, and I said yes. He also said he was starting to fall in love with me. Then he said something about not wanting to date right away because of his school, because he does not want a long distance relationship. Then he asked if I would wait for him. Did he just ask me out, and because I said yes to dating him are we dating? Also he makes me question him because he only visits me at night...this makes me think that his visits are booty calls. He does show effort in calling and will talk to me in public, but he will not invite me anywhere with his friends, and I am wondering why? it seems like he only calls me when his friends are not around. Can you tell me if you feel he is interested? What should I do to find out if he is being genuine? And why do some guys only call you when there friends are not around to hang out?

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bserious2012

How old is this friend, how long have you know each other? What kind of friendship did you have? I think if you knew him well enough, long enough you wouldn't have to ask so many questions. In my own experience if I have to ask everyone else about a guy then I usually don't know him as well as I think I do or we can't communicate very well. I think its safe to say you aren't dating him because he said he doesn't want a long distance relationship and then he left you. It sounds like he just came home from break or something and he's hanging out with a girl that he always wanted to hang out with. Then he's going to go away to school and forget about you. When he gets back you guys will do the same thing because you'll be waiting for him. If you're just having sex then yeah, these seem to be booty calls. If you want to see if he is serious ask him when the dating portion of your relationship is going to start. If he does anything other than start treating you like a legitmate girlfriend, i.e. dates, phone calls, outings with friends, you have your answer. Don't you think its strange that he can love you all of a sudden? If he's been thinking about you all this time he probably would have also been thinking about all the things he wants to do with you and the experiences he wants to share---clue....these wouldn't just be sexual things? He's using you.

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Since you don't know WTF he meant, I'd suggest you not make any assumptions about 'dating'.

 

Either ask him to spell out exactly what he means, or forget it. Wait? Wait around for what? Is he going to date/have sex with other people while you 'wait'?

 

And yes, it's a sign that he's using you if he only wants to see you at night, never takes you out, never introduces you to his friends, etc.

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