Samantha1973 Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 I know a lot of people on here despise the "friends with benefits" relationship and wont give advise to those posting questions about one. Things happen, so i am looking for some guidance. I'm not going to write the whole story as I will be here all night. lol. Just some basic background info to help. I met a guy 2.5 years ago online. We met, but just did friend stuff for a couple of months (movies, walks etc.) then we moved into our FWB relationship. We were both lonely at the time and had never done this before. We stayed like this for 1.5 years. We had a lot of adventurous fun together, went away on trips, movies, parties, office related stuff. It was almost real, except there was no committment. I have little dating experience and was enjoying myself but really wanted more (committment). At the time, I didnt know that he was pining for a girl (friend) who did NC when we met. He and I could never have had a real relationship as his mind was with her. She didnt want him and never gave any indication she wanted more. UNTIL, she found out that he and I were "together". She immediatly wanted 'more'. They were together for about 2 months. They fought all the time, finally she dumped him again for the 2nd time for good. I realized through our relationship that I really liked his personality, we had the same interests, and both want the same thing in life (to have a family). Its been a year now since we were togther. I told him face to face that we will never have another FWB relationship as I want the real thing. He seems to be scared when he is around me, as though I feel that he wants back in....but knows its not what he truely wants. I have felt for the past many months that he has been using me as an ego boost. I have been doing NC for the past 2months to get away from this. This guy is quiet, shy and doesnt get dates easily....kinda a computer geek. I'm just wondering whther he will still use me as an ego boost after I finish NC in a month. I did the NC so he could see me as a person, as a friend. Not his security pillow. Does this make sense? Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 I'm just wondering whther he will still use me as an ego boost after I finish NC in a month. This all depends on you..my dear.. do you want to be used again.. think about it... why would you end the NC in a month... I did the NC so he could see me as a person, as a friend. Not his security pillow. I doubt this will work out with him... He was OK with the fwb relationship... but you changed the rules... you wanted more... FWB is about none commitment... it's about sex.. just sex and good times... You knew that when you started with him... I say... keep the NC forever... Link to post Share on other sites
makemyblackrosesred Posted January 10, 2008 Share Posted January 10, 2008 Yeah..read my ladyfriend post. They guy I like has a friend he has been friends with for longer then 10 years and they go out to dinner..but its nothing serious because he doesn't want to commit to her. Its still hard to hear him call her his lady friend even though i know its platonic. Hey, at least you got to have sex. All I want is a one night stand with this man..i wish i could get him out of my head! When you say NC..you mean non commitment? Link to post Share on other sites
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