Am I asking too much or is she too controlling?

[car2007]

My wife and I separated 7 months ago. I’ve been seeing someone else since. I still live at the house in the basement primarily because of our 8 year old daughter and, quite frankly, financial realities. I will not ask my wife to sell the house because I feel strongly she and my daughter should continue to live there as long as they want. At some point in the future my financial situation will change for the better and I will be able to move out if I choose to, assuming I can bear the idea of leaving my kid. For now things are stable, my stbx is now seeing someone else as well. We are shielding our daughter from the separation and significant others for now because we both feel strongly she should continue to have a family at home at least until she is older. I go to a fair number of night meetings as part of my job so I can spend about 4 nights a week at my girlfriend’s and a Saturday and Saturday night without getting a lot of questions from my kid (I get home in the morning before she wakes up) and I haven’t slept in the same bed as my wife since before my daughter can remember so she doesn’t really question that either. When my stbx wants to see her “friend”, my daughter and I usually go the movies or otherwise spend the evening together. So here’s the problem: My girlfriend is very uneasy with my living arrangement. She’s my age but has never been married and has no children. She says she understands my need to stay with my daughter, but she doesn’t like the thought of me being at home with the stbx. She’s ok with the arrangement for now, though she doesn’t like it. The big problem will come soon I think because my stbx and I want to be able to do things occasionally with our daughter together, such as go to an amusement park or maybe even a mini-vacation for a few days. We feel this is important for her emotional development, to be able to have both her parents with her for memorable events. Although our “marriage” is kind of a sham now, our mutual love for our daughter is not. Stbx and I never do anything together just the two of us, at home or otherwise. Everything done together at home is in the context of being with our daughter (playing games, etc.). So the question is, is this asking too much of my girlfriend to accept? Am I being unreasonable in thinking I can continue a serious outside relationship while still being involved with my stbx and daughter in “family” activities? Anyone have any similar experiences?