Update from Stampdaddy

[White Flower]

Aww come on stamp did it to himself!

 

He put himself in that position to be used for 3 years!!!!

 

And he doesnt understand the idea that he's gonna be used as the MW's emotional jumping bag.

 

But hey this is what he wanted!

Sure, he knew that it was risky, but I'm sure you can see that he didn't really want this outcome. He believed in her. Even single people that we believe in can let us down.

[Chrome Barracuda]

Sure, he knew that it was risky, but I'm sure you can see that he didn't really want this outcome. He believed in her. Even single people that we believe in can let us down.

 

Yeah he believed that he could win a married woman away from her husband without having to deal without any fallout from the consequences of his actions.

 

Just imagine, If I was her husband and I saw stamp in that store with my wife. 3 year affair???

 

you might have had to call swat to drag me off of him.

 

Stamp should consider himself lucky he waled away with nothing than a bruised ego and a broken heart. People take you messing with their wives to heart.

 

You dont know how lucky you are....

[OWoman]

Yeah he believed that he could win a married woman away from her husband without having to deal without any fallout from the consequences of his actions.

 

I don't agree. Everything in Stamp's posts indicates that he was very aware that there would be fallout and consequences, and that he was prepared to face them. Trouble is, his crystal ball - like all of ours - is a bit cloudy, so what the fallout and consequences were going to be, he had no way of knowing.

 

CB I must say I find the implicit level of violence in your post disturbing - is it just Stamp's post that's touched a sore spot for you, or has something bad happened to make you feel so aggressive?

[OpenBook]

CB I must say I find the implicit level of violence in your post disturbing - is it just Stamp's post that's touched a sore spot for you, or has something bad happened to make you feel so aggressive?

 

And I don't understand why you think this is so unusual, OW. Most men I know would have exactly the same reaction. They're very territorial about their W's.

[Woggle]

I hate to sound heartless but what did you expect messing around with a cheater? She has you for thrills and a poor sucker at home providing her stability so two men are getting played here.

[stampdaddy]

let's try to keep this post on track. I was aware of consequenses and risks, and yes, the crystal ball is cloudy rightnow, but that's the way life is or why live it. I am dealing with some of the consequenses, hence the post. Beating me up does what exactly??

 

ANyway, thanks

[Woggle]

let's try to keep this post on track. I was aware of consequenses and risks, and yes, the crystal ball is cloudy rightnow, but that's the way life is or why live it. I am dealing with some of the consequenses, hence the post. Beating me up does what exactly??

 

ANyway, thanks

 

I am not beating you up I am hitting you over the head with the truth.

[stillafool]

Sorry for your sorrow Stampdaddy but if you ask me you are well rid of her. She is so unstable. She doesn't know what she wants or who. I really hope you will leave her alone unless she presents to you her divorce papers. I bet her H can hardly stand to look at her by now.

 

If he (her H) told her he wanted a divorce and told the parents, she must have begged him back again. Do you ask her why she does this? Forget asking her anything just stay away from her - she's poison.

[Owl]

Stamp-

 

What are you doing for yourself to help YOU recover right now?

 

What are you doing to fill the time you used to spend with her? What are you doing to refocus your own efforts and energies into something else, so that you're not totally focused on the loss of what was?

[stampdaddy]

Stamp-

 

What are you doing for yourself to help YOU recover right now?

 

What are you doing to fill the time you used to spend with her? What are you doing to refocus your own efforts and energies into something else, so that you're not totally focused on the loss of what was?

I'm good, really.. I've allowed myself a day or two to "let it all out", over the Holidays when not much was going on, but now it's back to the grindstone for work. I coach my son's baseball team, and we are now getting started with that (actually had practice this past Sunday and now every Wednesday night). And I've been finishing my painting projects here at the house that I started a while back... As far as the R goes, I keep throwing EVERYTHING into the giant sifter and shaking and shaking to see what's left, and then I'll do it again.. The same things keep remaining true.. And that gives me warmth inside.. One day at a time and we'll see where the Daddy of Stamp winds up...

[stampdaddy]

Sorry for your sorrow Stampdaddy but if you ask me you are well rid of her. She is so unstable. She doesn't know what she wants or who. I really hope you will leave her alone unless she presents to you her divorce papers. I bet her H can hardly stand to look at her by now.

 

If he (her H) told her he wanted a divorce and told the parents, she must have begged him back again. Do you ask her why she does this? Forget asking her anything just stay away from her - she's poison.

Poison is harsh, confused is correct.. I HAVE done a great job staying away, no calls, no visits, no texts, NC... Again, the H did say that about wanting the Divorce but said he would address it after the Holidays, which is NOW... so, we shall see. Kids are just now back to school.

[Lyssa]

Poison is harsh, confused is correct.. I HAVE done a great job staying away, no calls, no visits, no texts, NC... Again, the H did say that about wanting the Divorce but said he would address it after the Holidays, which is NOW... so, we shall see. Kids are just now back to school.

 

That's good, Stamp.

 

If she comes back with the papers in hand, take the time to talk things through then.

[Chrome Barracuda]

I don't agree. Everything in Stamp's posts indicates that he was very aware that there would be fallout and consequences, and that he was prepared to face them. Trouble is, his crystal ball - like all of ours - is a bit cloudy, so what the fallout and consequences were going to be, he had no way of knowing.

 

CB I must say I find the implicit level of violence in your post disturbing - is it just Stamp's post that's touched a sore spot for you, or has something bad happened to make you feel so aggressive?

 

I'm not aggressive but there is such thing called honor where I'm from you dont mess with another man's wife or vice versa.

 

There is a thing called protecting your marriage. If the OM wont take a hint to leave you alone, In all honesty you must make him see the error of his ways. If not through violence then by discussion.

If the wife wants out, I say let her go and give her to him.

 

Odds are she'll cheat on him once the luster starts wearing off they all do.

 

As an OW you've never had a BW come up in your face about messing with her man? She has a right to defend her marriage from OWomen.

 

Even if her dumb ass husband is a scumbag, she's doing the right thing.

[kchiapet95]

Normally I agree with you on a lot of stuff, CB, but I have to disagree on this one.

 

I'm not a man, so maybe this is where my reasoning is coming from. I'm not one of those who says the OP has no part in the disintegration of the M. However, it was your W or H who took the vows to you, not the OW or OM. Therefore, it is your W or H who you should be talking to about ending their affair, not the OP. It is the problem with them that is going to keep your marriage on the rocks. You may succeed in beating--sorry, DISCUSSING-- the OP away, but if your H or W is a serial cheater, they will just find another willing party. I'm not saying you throw your hands up and quit, but confronting the OP may not even drive them away, it may make them fight for MM or MW even more, and then still the decision to end the A will be on MM or MW.

 

JMHO.

Edited January 8, 2008 by kchiapet95
left off punctuation

[reboot]

CB I must say I find the implicit level of violence in your post disturbing

Whatever country you live in must be much more civilized than ours. It's not uncommon at all to hear of such things where I live.

[Chrome Barracuda]

Normally I agree with you on a lot of stuff, CB, but I have to disagree on this one.

 

I'm not a man, so maybe this is where my reasoning is coming from. I'm not one of those who says the OP has no part in the disintegration of the M. However, it was your W or H who took the vows to you, not the OW or OM. Therefore, it is your W or H who you should be talking to about ending their affair, not the OP. It is the problem with them that is going to keep your marriage on the rocks. You may succeed in beating--sorry, DISCUSSING-- the OP away, but if your H or W is a serial cheater, they will just find another willing party. I'm not saying you throw your hands up and quit, but confronting the OP may not even drive them away, it may make them fight for MM or MW even more, and then still the decision to end the A will be on MM or MW.

 

JMHO.

 

You can say what you want but no 3rd party should have no bearing at all on a disintergration of a marriage, that OP has to take the consequences of interferring completely in a marriage.

 

Like if you commit a crime and as an accessory you know about it and aided it. You could be arrested too. Why? Because you was a part of it!

 

Accept responisbility of your choices. In the streets if you mess with someone's wife who's well respected you aint gonna get no love from mutual friends because what you done is disrespectful within itself.

 

That's the bottom line.

 

In one form or another your gonna have to pay for it down the line in one way or another.

 

And of course if the wife is a serial cheater I aint gonna fight for her I'm actually gonna throw her to the damn wolves!!! lol. But if she's doing everything to make it right and the OM cant take a hint then what?

 

Your just gonna stand back and do nothing? You gotta stand for your marriage.

[stampdaddy]

You can say what you want but no 3rd party should have no bearing at all on a disintergration of a marriage, that OP has to take the consequences of interferring completely in a marriage.

 

Like if you commit a crime and as an accessory you know about it and aided it. You could be arrested too. Why? Because you was a part of it!

 

Accept responisbility of your choices. In the streets if you mess with someone's wife who's well respected you aint gonna get no love from mutual friends because what you done is disrespectful within itself.

 

That's the bottom line.

 

In one form or another your gonna have to pay for it down the line in one way or another.

 

And of course if the wife is a serial cheater I aint gonna fight for her I'm actually gonna throw her to the damn wolves!!! lol. But if she's doing everything to make it right and the OM cant take a hint then what?

 

Your just gonna stand back and do nothing? You gotta stand for your marriage.

I AM leaving her alone.. Let's make that clear.

[frannie]

There is a thing called protecting your marriage. If the OM wont take a hint to leave you alone, In all honesty you must make him see the error of his ways. If not through violence then by discussion.

 

Violence first, then?

 

I'm not sure where it is you live, but is this kind of thing legal there? Or are you just attempting to justify assault?

[precious1357]

I have been with MW for over 3 1/2 years now.. Just about everyday, and totally had found my beautiful Angel.. I really thought that everyday, we were one step closer to becoming WE.. Dday was in July. Threats of kicking her out did not stop the A. Several other Ddays since. 2 weeks ago H told her that he wanted a Divorce, told his parents that he was divoricing his W, and almost told the children. 2 weeks ago I was being begged to "wait for her" to last week being told "goodbye". Needless to say, I am VERY hurt, lost and confused.... I always believed...

 

Is what new, the development or my story? I have posted a few threads before.. The development is new and I am reeling. 3 weeks ago we were at lunch, and she promised me HER.. After lunch, H shows up in the parking lot, face to face, her 2 worlds collided.. He told her he wanted a divorce, called his parents that already knew about the situation for the past 6 months.. He was going to tell the kids, but was talked out of it until after the Holidays.. 2 days later, she is pleading with me to wait for her.. Last week, she told me good bye, she wasnt coming.. However, they hadnt talked yet.... 3 1/2 years of thinking, hoping and believing that you are getting there.. and then, BAM! It feels like I just ran off of a cliff and am free falling. I can't hear anything, see anything, feel anything and I know nothing...

Wow! I feel for you...