Online Dating Stories?

[bozwa]

I've always gotten conflicted views on the whole online dating thing. I've met people who had no luck whatsoever online and I've met people who met the love of their life on the thing. I was just curious how many of us out there were actually successful in finding someone REAL from online dating?

 

I'm interested in hearing your stories!

[Art_Critic]

I met my wife on match.. but after years of duds and a few failed relationships that were born online

[tanbark813]

I'm not sure what you mean by REAL but I've met gf's from online dating. I've also met women where it was just one or two dates and went nowhere. I have yet to meet the love of my life.

 

I will say, however, that a friend of mine who got married last year met his wife on eHarmony.

[bozwa]

I'm not sure what you mean by REAL but I've met gf's from online dating. I've also met women where it was just one or two dates and went nowhere. I have yet to meet the love of my life.

 

I will say, however, that a friend of mine who got married last year met his wife on eHarmony.

 

What I mean by "real" is someone you were compatible with, someone beyond just a couple dates/casual sex.

 

The reason I ask is because I did online dating, met a bunch of idiots looking for one thing, I met a**holes basically. Then I did meet the love of my life on a free dating website. Luck of the draw? Or is it truly possible for everyone to find their "one" that way?

[SeraBella]

I have had a few long term relationships from online dating.

 

I think it's about as successful as anywhere. You're going to meet winners and duds at any arena you use for meeting people.

 

My brother's been married for over 8 years to someone he met online. They didn't meet on a dating site, but online nonetheless.

 

I have a friend who is getting married next month, she met her fiance on plentyoffish.

 

I have another friend who got married a couple years ago, he met his wife on match.

 

I know lots of others who have dated or are in relationships, but I think those are the only marriages (from online) of people I know right now.

[bozwa]

I have had a few long term relationships from online dating.

 

I think it's about as successful as anywhere. You're going to meet winners and duds at any arena you use for meeting people.

 

My brother's been married for over 8 years to someone he met online. They didn't meet on a dating site, but online nonetheless.

 

I have a friend who is getting married next month, she met her fiance on plentyoffish.

 

I have another friend who got married a couple years ago, he met his wife on match.

 

I know lots of others who have dated or are in relationships, but I think those are the only marriages (from online) of people I know right now.

 

I also met my bf on plentyoffish.

 

I do agree with you that the same bad or good luck will follow you no matter where you meet people.

[Green]

Personaly online dating is not for me. Ive tried it out a couple times, only had it work out once. I feel bad for people who rely on it because I have so much better luck doing things the old fashioned way

[LoveLace]

Personally and from knowing others who have used online dating, the result is only 1 of 2 things: your soulmate or an endless series of totally unsuitable mates or dates. I personally fit into category B. I started using online dating in 1999. There were a few guys that I chatted on the phone with 1st for a while and I'd be so excited to meet him. Then we'd meet and dispite exchanging of pics I'd be disappointed to find he was a lot more attractive in the pic than in person (common problem with online dating...many only want to post which ever pic makes them THE hottest, plus they can easily be cropped, altered, etc)

 

The other problem was guys who were only after sex; they'd tell me to come to the bar where they worked and such; TONS of those. At one point I tried E Harmony because I figured there would less of this there.

 

....Waste of $50!! You sit there and chat back and forth before you can see their pic, then "Damn!"....I was hoping he would be cute!! I met 1 guy from who was decent looking....but it was obvious after our 1st short meeting he wasn't further interested. After that I was so much more pickier about who I met after talking on the phone, that it got to be a waste of time...finally gave up at that point!!

 

I think it also depends on what attitude you go in it with, because from the beginning it felt somewhat desperate, unnatural if you will. It's cool to meet new people like that but I guess what it boils down to I'd like to say I meet the love of my life the old fashioned way....accidental and in person!

[allina]

My bf's best friend met his gf on Match, they've been very happy for over a year now. Both are great, successful people I know of other successful Match relationships but this one is closest to me.

[monkey00]

Been trying it recently, no luck. Though my roommate met his current gf from yahoo personals. If you ask me they make a great match, but then again maybe he got lucky.

 

Though I think the problem that spawns with online dating are it makes people very picky, because of the availability of options...and just constantly clicking through pics and writing people off without knowing them.

 

I was talking to this girl online yesterday, and it was going really smooth and we seemed to click. Then she mentioned to me about my hot pic..well I found out she was looking at the wrong profile - not mine. When she saw my actual profile and saw I was a year younger...well she immediately turned sour and did a 180, and the funny thing is she got nasty on me as if I lied to her. When in reality I should be the one pissed because she made the mistake of looking at the wrong profile/pic.

 

In any case, I think the cyberspace part really distorts and dissuades from real attraction because of expected standards like age/race/occupation/etc. If girl/guy meets someone in person, attraction is there, and they click, I think they would let some of their standards slide.

[D-Lish]

I have had both good and nightmarish experiences from online dating.

 

I have had a long term relationship- a few short term flings- and met some guys who have become friends.

 

I met a guy whom I believed to be "the one" on Plenty of Fish.... but after 2 months of dating his WIFE called me. He had been playing me all along- even had a seperate "pad" and private cell. That turned me off of the dating thing.

 

Let's see- I had a date with a guy who kept lifting his leg and farting during dinner... I had a guy get smashed and started drunk spitting nachos on me when he talked....I got a stalker who I needed to get a restraining order against....One guy cornered me in a booth and tried to grope me. And the best date... a weirdo followed me into the ladies bathroom and stood outside the stall while I was trying to pee.

 

BUT- I have been doing this a long time- and those are the bad ones. I have met some good guys and had some great dates- even with people I didn't want to pursue a romantic relationship with.

 

I am still single- sort of seeing a youngin I met, and he provides me with good companionship.

 

I do have many friends who have met and gotten married from lavalife or the like. I think it does work for many people. The internet just opens you up to a whole realm of possibilities of meeting people you would never have run into in the real world.

 

I got a webcam- and I insist on seeing the person on cam before meeting them. You can't fake it that way.

[serial muse]

I met a guy whom I believed to be "the one" on Plenty of Fish.... but after 2 months of dating his WIFE called me. He had been playing me all along- even had a seperate "pad" and private cell. That turned me off of the dating thing.

 

Let's see- I had a date with a guy who kept lifting his leg and farting during dinner... I had a guy get smashed and started drunk spitting nachos on me when he talked....I got a stalker who I needed to get a restraining order against....One guy cornered me in a booth and tried to grope me. And the best date... a weirdo followed me into the ladies bathroom and stood outside the stall while I was trying to pee.

 

:eek:

 

wow, D-lish. Those are some crazy stories!

 

I've had some duds (although nothing crazy like that!) but I've also had a couple of long-term (year-plus) relationships from online dating. Including the man I'm with now.

[DazedandConfused66]

I had a person in my office meet his wife online. But he always said that online dating is a bit like shopping for the "perfect" card at Hallmark. They all look the same after awhile and you really start to feel worse about it than doing it the old fashioned way. Everyone just boils down to a profile and you always have this odd feeling that you could be missing the "right" person simply because you are stuck looking at profiles that may or may not be truthful.

 

But...it worked for him in spite of his jaded comments. He was at it for some time, however....like 3-4 years.

[EnigmaXOXO]

I'm interested in hearing your stories!

 

I first ran across my boyfriend’s profile on Match. Didn’t say a whole lot about himself, and the photo was a bit deceiving because he looked so young. Had an adorable little girl in his lap so I assumed it was a nice young guy with his daughter. I thought ... “Aw, how sweet!” Sent him a quick blurb and suggested that he post his profile on a particular forum where there were oodles of attractive young ladies who adored men with long hair.

 

A couple of months passed while busy planning my out-of-state move ... but one night, I found a little free time and decided to check out the forum. And there he was! Being nosey as I was, I sent him another quick IM and asked if he was having any better luck with all the young hotties on the site. To my surprise, he responded “NO!” and we began chatting back and forth. The first thing that got my attention was his quick wit and sense of humor. He was just as cynical and sarcastic as I was. And VERY bright. I later found out that he wasn’t nearly as young as I surmised by his picture and the charab-cheeked little girl in his lap was his niece who he adored and dotted over. We also discover we only lived an hour away from each other.

 

After a few emails back and forth ... I finally sent him a pic. And like a few other guys I had met, at first he was skeptical and thought someone was playing a joke on him. We exchanged phone numbers and spoke on the phone a couple of times before finally agreeing to meet. He admitted later that he was prepared to bolt if someone other than the gal in the photo walked up to greet him.

 

When I stepped out, the look on his face was priceless. His face turned beet red and he looked down at his feet all bashful and grinning. And he was absolutely GORGIOUS ... even better in person than the picture he posted. The mutual attraction was instantaneous and our personalities clicked. I’ve never met anyone who was as put together on the inside as he was on the outside.

 

Needless to say, I eventually cancelled my plans to relocate and we have been together ever since. Eight years so far, and it has only gotten better with time. It was J’s first time meeting someone online and my fourth time. Not bad odds considering most of the people you meet in the traditional fashion work out the same way. Especially if your not into fix-ups, dating the people you work with, or prowling the bars, clubs and meat markets hoping to find the one sober guy who doesn’t have a fake ID and curfew.

[littlekitty]

I've had several relationships from online dating, and met my husband in an online dating service too!

[bozwa]

Thanks for the all the stories! I love hearing them.

 

D-Lish, I loved the stories - even though I'm sure you didn't care to go through them! I had a couple myself. It doesn't help to see the guys on webcam before you meet them - if they're SHORTER than you!! LOL I'm 5'2; I didn't think I would have a problem finding someone taller than me! haha I about crapped myself when this guy got out of his car and I had to practically bend down to hug him hello!! Luckily I don't have any of those crazy stories!!

 

And tell me: is the "easy let-down" for a man to tell the woman he's talking to that he's too nervous to meet, or won't talk on the phone cause he's too nervous, or he's been screwed by meeting people from the internet before, so he's not ready to meet, etc etc etc.? Because I seriously had about FOUR men IN A ROW do this to me. Now I am a pretty cool person (I think ), and I'm not too shabby to look at (pretty sure )...I think I just got unlucky.

 

Finally when the last guy did that to me after we'd been talking for a long time, we got along SO well, it was like our minds had known eachother forever, we could practically finish eachother's sentences. We both could see us in eachother's lives for years to come if not forever. When the discussion of meeting came up, all of a sudden the calls stopped, the emails stopped. Everything. I actually emailed him to ask if he was ok and to tell him I was worried. After about another week, he wrote to me telling me that he's been really hurt and screwed over by women he's met on the internet and he was scared to go through that again, that I was a really nice person, that he really liked me, but he couldn't go out with me. I actually was pretty hurt by this. It was then I decided that was it for me with Online dating. I was done. That was the last wierdo i was going to talk to.

 

Then I received an email on Plentyoffish from my current bf, the ONE. LOL I wasn't going to open it, but something made me do it. I read it, responded, and here we are a year and a month later, happy as can be, living together, and talking marriage and kids. I'm so glad I opened that email.

 

Keep the stories coming! I love this!

[CaliGuy]

I've tried it a few times and never had luck with it. It seemed that more often than not, people trumped themselves into being much more than they were.

[mental_traveller]

I've used it, and I think it can work as long as you simply use it as a way to arrange the initial meeting quickly, then take it "offline" from then on. Then it's kinda similar to just meeting someone at a cafe and getting their number for a date later. I think it works less well if you spend huge amounts of time chatting online, endless emails etc. Just surf all the pics near your are, email the ones you like, and if any reply then arrange dinner sometime and take it from there.

 

I have to say though, I much prefer meeting people the old-fashioned way. You can instantly tell if you are attracted, whereas photos can be deceiving. And then there's the challenge of chatting someone up, it's more fun & spontaneous than meeting someone from a dating site.

[katiebour]

I agree with mental traveller. 2 of my 3 LTRs were people I met online (one of them is my current b/f of 2 1/2 years) but in each case we spent less than a week before we met in person. Met the ex on Yahoo! Personals (back when they were free) and met the current b/f on Myspace.

 

Went on a LOT of dates via Craigslist but struck out on most of them (had some great ONS though!)

 

I think long, drawn-out relationships via internet are silly. If you are a serious adult looking for a real relationship, then you can't be afraid to meet them in person. Also trying to find someone online who lives hours and hours away from you simply means that if you get serious one of you will have to move.

 

The internet is a great place to initially meet people (at least you have a better chance of having something in common than if you meet someone in a bar) but it has to move into reality from there.