d1410 Posted June 18, 2003 Share Posted June 18, 2003 Here's the short folks. I was dating a guy for about 2 months (not long really). It seemed to be going well until a few weeks ago. a little background.. he's recently out of his marriage and has alot of baggage, so I was reluctant to get involved. He's had a lot of stress in his life lately. But, I decided he was worth the effort despite raised eyebrows from family members. I tried to take it slow but we got intimate quick fast. After about a month, he said he wanted to take the "relationship" down a knotch, meaning he wanted to take a break from sex. I tried not to be upset about it but obviously this wasn't a good sign. I was patient and I spent time with him as a friend and we basically just cuddled and did friend things together. I tried not to pressure him but asked him once in a 2-week period if he was wanting to get back 'into the groove.' he said soon... About 4 days after that, we made tentative plans for the following weekend. He said 'call you tomorrow.' It's been almost a week and no phone call. I called him twice to leave nice messages but no reply.....Since we met, we have talked almost every day, so of course, I was suprised he didn't return my phone calls. Why is he blowing me off so rudely? why can't he simply tell me it's not working for him and go our seperate ways? The problem now is he lives close by and we frequent the same gym. How do I react to seeing him? What is appropriate...I don't want to be disgruntled about this...but it's like a smack in the face. What should I do?? ...in rebound land. Link to post Share on other sites
yes Posted June 18, 2003 Share Posted June 18, 2003 I'm not going to guess as to why he blew you off but here's what i'd do at the gym: -if you bump into him: "hi *smile* *walk by" -if he tries to talk to you: "sorry, i'm in a rush" - DON"T let him talk to you - just walk away. -if he hides his eyes from you or otherwise ignores you, just do the same. good luck, -yes Link to post Share on other sites
Author d1410 Posted June 18, 2003 Author Share Posted June 18, 2003 That's a great suggestion, thanks. I've been wanting to call and tell him off, but my friends say 'no, way' It's hard to let it go, but I guess that's the strong option. Link to post Share on other sites
yes Posted June 18, 2003 Share Posted June 18, 2003 he didn't return your calls for way too long. unless he calls and says he was in a coma, it's oficially over. so might as well keep your head up high =) good luck, -yes Link to post Share on other sites
clia Posted June 18, 2003 Share Posted June 18, 2003 Just let go. Do exactly what Yes said at the gym. Be friendly, but not overly friendly. You are busy and have things to do! Guys poof all the time. I had a guy poof after eight months. I think some of them just don't want to deal with breaking up, so they think it's easier to just vanish. (Whatever, right????) Anyway, just hold your head high, keep your dignity by no longer contacting him, and move on. You'll find another guy who is soooo much better. (They are always right around the corner!) Link to post Share on other sites
Author d1410 Posted June 18, 2003 Author Share Posted June 18, 2003 guys do poof, don't they. It's only happened a few times to me but I now know not to get too involved at the start. thanks you guys. I will hold my head way up high, that's for sure oh, yeah...what do I do with the book he leant me? bring it to the gym? Link to post Share on other sites
lil_bad_girl44 Posted June 19, 2003 Share Posted June 19, 2003 Ya know everyone was right. Its over. He could be talking with the ex again...which is a huge possibility, he could have gotten scared because he could have felt you guys were a fun fkling/ rebound and you got too close....but thats not the point. I had a guy do the exact same thing to mme... and heres what I did, I was very nice when I saw him...I said hello and ask how he was doing but when he tried to tell me his lame stories to justify why he stopped calling, I just said, ya know I gotta run and when he said for me to call I just smiled and aid " well,, i 'll see ya." DDont let that jerk reel you back in. Be strong, take it as a loss and move it along. ( and take the book as a gain. its a gift for your troubles) good luck...and dont let him treat you as a peice of meat anmymore. tell him youve found other ways to occupy your time now. And Im sorry he did that to you. I kknow how it feels and how it hurts! So be true to yourself. Link to post Share on other sites
Author d1410 Posted June 20, 2003 Author Share Posted June 20, 2003 thanks lil_bad_girl44 for your advice. it helps alot! ..it's not why he didn't call, he just wasn't considerate enough to spend one minute to do so....until last night. Almost a week later, he left a message saying lame things like 'I had things on the go' and 'time went so fast' and how he knew what he did was ****ty and that he was very sorry. I am just going to ignore the call. but, thanks everyone for the advice..it's greatly appreciated. I hope I can help y'all out in the future. d1410 Link to post Share on other sites
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