Silent Heart Posted January 15, 2008 Share Posted January 15, 2008 I just need to vent a little in the comfortable anonymity of an online forum, because God knows I wouldn’t admit any of this to anyone I know. I’m in a really weird relationship with two guys. They both use me for sex on a somewhat regular basis, which I’m actually fine with. I’d rather be in a loving relationship, but I can’t seem to meet any men that aren’t ass-holes, or that think they can treat me like a slut because I have large breasts. (Could someone please explain the connection to me?) Ironically, the two fellows I’m physically intimate with are incredible ass-holes and have actually called me a “slut” to my face, so I don’t think either are candidates for that loving relationship I’m in the market for. But they are kind of my buddies outside the bedroom, so unless I’m going to go without sex at all, I might as well have it with them. And to be fair, I do let them use me for sex so it’s hard to argue against the “slut” label with these particular guys. As long as they don’t brag to anyone that knows who I am, I’ll let it slide. (Plus one of them is gorgeous, so he can already pretty much get away with murder). What actually bothers me is being called a “bitch.” Maybe it’s the blood draining from their heads, but whenever they get aroused they both seem to forget my name. (On the upside, it is a pretty reliable warning system. If I’m not in the mood and one of them starts addressing me as “bitch,” that is my cue to make up something about forgetting to feed the cat and excusing myself). What’s even more infuriating is that when they are together they tend to talk about “the bitch” as if I weren’t actually in the room. Sometimes I wave my arms and say, “Hey, you know I’m right here?” to which I usually get the response, “Shut up, bitch.” (I know that sounds horrifying, but the tone is much more playful than it reads. My relationship with most of my male relations seems to be based entirely on teasing me. I’m such an easy mark). The other thing that is starting to get to me is that the sex is starting to feel like it is in a rut. I thought this only happened after you married someone, and that secret dom/sub/dom love triangles stayed interesting forever. I want to feel like the guy I’m with is excited to be doing things to ME. I am starting to feel like I’m just the easiest girl in the room, which I realize may not be far from the truth, but that doesn’t mean I can’t be exciting too, does it? Link to post Share on other sites
Cobra_X30 Posted January 15, 2008 Share Posted January 15, 2008 Ironically, the two fellows I’m physically intimate with are incredible ass-holes and have actually called me a “slut” to my face, so I don’t think either are candidates for that loving relationship I’m in the market for. But they are kind of my buddies outside the bedroom, so unless I’m going to go without sex at all, I might as well have it with them. And to be fair, I do let them use me for sex so it’s hard to argue against the “slut” label with these particular guys. As long as they don’t brag to anyone that knows who I am, I’ll let it slide. (Plus one of them is gorgeous, so he can already pretty much get away with murder). If I could give you any advice at all. Please drop both of these guys and fast. Never hang out with them again. Listen, they are not good for your self esteem! Re-read to how you talk about yourself. If you allow them to call you names like slut, and bitch, and I'm sure other nasty names, then take advantage of you... at some point your going to start believing that is all your worth. So, please, dump them and hold steady... otherwise a good man will have trouble seeing your true value... because you wont know how to show him. Don't settle for this! Are you not worth more? Link to post Share on other sites
crzyblndstar Posted January 15, 2008 Share Posted January 15, 2008 I want to feel like the guy I’m with is excited to be doing things to ME. I am starting to feel like I’m just the easiest girl in the room, which I realize may not be far from the truth, but that doesn’t mean I can’t be exciting too, does it? First of all, these two guys are not excited to be doing things with you. They are using you for sex. I am imagining that you are not someone, like an FWB, that they call when they are in the mood. You are someone to them that they will be with if you are there, definatley not their first priority. I am not trying to be mean in what I am saying, but you really need to get some self respect. I understand that you are basically using them for sex too, which I am completely fine with, if you have an understanding. But, they are disrespecting you by calling you "the bitch". Why would you even put up with that? If it was a respectful and successful FWB situation, I would tell you to continue on, but this is obviously not. You ar being used, not by one, but by 2 guys, who are friends as well. The next thing they will be asking you for is a threesome, if it hasn't happened already. If I were you, I would stop all contact with these guys. They are obviously not your friends, at all. Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted January 15, 2008 Share Posted January 15, 2008 A bitch a slut and maybe a troll? Link to post Share on other sites
crzyblndstar Posted January 15, 2008 Share Posted January 15, 2008 A bitch a slut and maybe a troll? I thought about that too, but just for the small chance that it is not...... Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted January 15, 2008 Share Posted January 15, 2008 I thought about that too, but just for the small chance that it is not...... Well who knows to hyphenate the word ass-hole so that it doesn't read *******? That's a pretty good guess for a first timer. Link to post Share on other sites
Kenyth Posted January 15, 2008 Share Posted January 15, 2008 Ummmmm................. your behavior defines who you are at any given time. If you're compfortable with that, that's fine. Slut is a very subjective term. I think we've all had certain points in our life where we were more promiscuous and not interested in long term relationships. It doesn't sound to me like you're comfortable with the person you are anymore and want something more. No problem, it just means it's time for a change. You're not going to attract any good long term potential while you have the two booty call buddies in the picture, so you're best off losing them. I'd like to say you could stay friends, but matters are complicated and you don't want them poisoning any new relationships because they're mad they lost their favorite F-buddy. Losing them could take a while as they are liable to be disappointed. Their current lack of respect for you also means they're not likely to respect your decision to cut it off with them either, so be prepared. You're going to have to resign yourself to a little celibacy if you want a meaningful relationship. All in all, changing your life is very possible, but it's all up to you. Link to post Share on other sites
sb129 Posted January 15, 2008 Share Posted January 15, 2008 Bitch, slut, unpaid hooker....... its all the same really isn't it? Why not take it one step further and actually get some money off these guys- at least then you will be getting something out of it. I smell the whiff of a troll too... Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted January 15, 2008 Share Posted January 15, 2008 And if you're not a troll then why not find one more guy? You have three holes. Link to post Share on other sites
crzyblndstar Posted January 15, 2008 Share Posted January 15, 2008 And if you're not a troll then why not find one more guy? You have three holes. I just spit water all over the place. Hilarious. Link to post Share on other sites
Mary3 Posted January 17, 2008 Share Posted January 17, 2008 It was a pretty well written letter hrmmm.....Now I have to ask , why do your large breasts equate = with slut ? There are women with large mams that are no where near a slut. However if this is a true sincere letter : You are letting 2 guys bang you that are friends.( 3 ~some likely already happened here. ) The real question is to figure out why you don't think you deserve better ? They call you bitch and slut while they are drilling you. Its kind of bothersome to you. Well you can dump both of them, get some self esteem classes and someday find a great relationship. Or you can continue to degrade yourself with multiple penises which are attached to 2 guys that don't give a darn about you. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts