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ex texted my happy bday do i respond?


BrianG

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just a simple happy bday text from my ex-gf which doesnt illicit a response, I am thinking i should just ignore it and continue with nc since i want her back more than anything but i need to heal because she does not love me "that way" anymore. I dont want to be rude but at this point were not friends, not together anymore and dont want to be just friends. It was nice that she actually remembered but i am thinking its just best to not respond because my heart just sunk into my stomach seeing a text from her.

Any opinions on how to handle the situation in a mature way?

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I don't know, part of me says "Say thanks" which is probably in the end what I would do but if you aren't ready for that then ignoring it is probably the best.

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Yernasia Quorelios

I agree with the others...respond with a "thank you".

 

IMHO the only non-negotiable part of NC is "do not initiate contact". Unless the ex has been told in no uncertain terms that contact is unwelcome and will be ignored, it is discourteous to ignore any contact from the ex that would normally warrant a response such as "thank you", "I'm fine" etc. In these circumstances any contact from the ex that does not warrant a response can be courteously ignored ;).

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I vote to ignore it. Once you reply with a thank you, much of your time will be spent wondering "Does she want to get back together, will she reply??", etc, etc, etc.

 

Not worth it in my opinion. She's your ex, not a friend and as such, doesn't really deserve anything from you.

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Brian not sure if you ever responded...but I wouldn't respond.

It was nice that she remembered, but personally I would

rather get a random text or call on any other day than my b-day.

Of course they are trying not to be the bad guy by saying happy b-day....but it doesn't mean anything special. It's an 'obligatory" text.

And it didn't illicit a response.....so my vote is to not respond.

 

Thats just me though.

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I wouldn't reply to it, no response from my side at all. I mean if she wants something from you, or speak to you, she oughta do the right move and come see you and all. Even then, I wouldn't say anything, unless I heard what I want to hear. So, short answer, no, don't reply, don't even say "thanks". By the way, I'm pretty sure she knows how you feel. If you already told her you love her a lot. Then, really, don't say Thanks at all!

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I am thinking i should just ignore it and continue with nc since i want her back more than anything but i need to heal because she does not love me "that way" anymore.

 

Perfect... it will only break the scabs on the hurt if you reply..

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thanks everyone. I just chose to ignore it and delete it. No need to respond, were not together, and were not friends and never will be, so no point in saying thanks becauses she broke my heart.

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I do hope you had a nice birthday though!

 

You did the right thing by ignoring her text. She isn't in your life at all so no point in opening that door as it's just going to hurt you.

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Cheers mate, you did something that requires lots of inner strenght, I'm really happy. It'll be a thing of the past soon. happy birthday again and rock on!!!!

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Yeah it was hard not to respond. Still miserable that i have to accept her as part of my past, but it is out of my control and hope to one day to be able to accept the situation and move on. I wanted a future with us and I have to learn to accept that is nothing more than an old chapter in the story of my life. A chapter I keep re-visiting. I guess i have not gotten sick of it yet.

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proud of you. and its hard, and you will bea stronger person in the end. letting go isn't easy and it isn't overnight. its going to hurt but you will come out of this a more confident you, and eventually find a girl who wants you in her present and future just as much as you do.

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