Re: Please Advise!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Hopefully Helpful]

Well I can understand her reasons for pushing you away. It is obvious that she is very much in love with you or she wouldn't be trying to work things out. You are hostile with her and you blow up is this something you have always done? (before her) Anger management is a very hard task to fix. It isn't possible for you to fix it in one week. She is probably hesitent to get close to you because she is aware of how hard it is for you to change. You obviously want to change or you wouldn't get help, although if you are doing this solely for her and not because you want to make a conscious change your attempt is hopeless. Sometimes in life we have people who push us to strive to be our best.. and for a small amount of time we can succeed but we can not live on other peoples desires you must soul search and maybe even leave for a while to work on your problem. If she loves you she will wait... and don't ever embarress a girl in front of her family. If you do things like that in front of them, I'm sure they think it gets worse behind closed doors.

 

My Fiance and myself have been together for almost 2 years. We have had fight off and on. I have some anger control issues that I have been trying to fix myself and have not been able to fix, so now I am seeing a counsellor to help me work through these problems. I am not a violent person I just get frustrated too easily, and tend to blow things out of proportion. We had a huge fight towards the end of January. I called the next day to find someone to see. I am still following through on my promise to do this. In the meantime though on February sixth we had another fight. But this time it was while we were at her parents house. She is very hurt and now she is embarrased as well. She has always gotten over being mad at me within 24 hours before. But this time is different. She has made me move into the guest room and will not let me touch her. She just tells me that she needs space and time. And that she wants me to prove to her that I can act differently. I have really been trying for almost a week. But she has still not decided if she will take me back. Is there anything that I can do to make things right with her other than changing my bahavior patterns and waiting for her to get over what I have done???. Your opinions are appreciated. I really love her and I don't want to lose her, or be seperated from her.

[Shirley]

My Fiance and myself have been together for almost 2 years. We have had fight off and on. I have some anger control issues that I have been trying to fix myself and have not been able to fix, so now I am seeing a counsellor to help me work through these problems. I am not a violent person I just get frustrated too easily, and tend to blow things out of proportion. We had a huge fight towards the end of January. I called the next day to find someone to see. I am still following through on my promise to do this. In the meantime though on February sixth we had another fight. But this time it was while we were at her parents house. She is very hurt and now she is embarrased as well. She has always gotten over being mad at me within 24 hours before. But this time is different. She has made me move into the guest room and will not let me touch her. She just tells me that she needs space and time. And that she wants me to prove to her that I can act differently. I have really been trying for almost a week. But she has still not decided if she will take me back. Is there anything that I can do to make things right with her other than changing my bahavior patterns and waiting for her to get over what I have done???. Your opinions are appreciated. I really love her and I don't want to lose her, or be seperated from her.

 

Hi!

 

Are your fights physical? And how angry do you get? Enough so that your strength can over-power her. She cannot stay with you if she's afraid of being abused. You need to work on that and change the way you deal with anger before there can be any chance of a loving relationship. When you love someone, you do everything in your power to do things that make them happy.