sptu Posted February 6, 2008 Share Posted February 6, 2008 hi and sorry for my english but they are not my native language. my problem is that i used to have a ldr and my bf asked me to stop, as "he cant afford anymore this kind of relathionship". even if i say ok, he called me some days after to tell me that its difficcult for him not to speak to me as he missed me but he is still sure that we cant be together. till then, we had some rows, some good moments, but now we are not together, and we might try again when i will be there on july in order to continue my studies for some months. i want him very much and i am afraid..what should i do?! Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted February 6, 2008 Share Posted February 6, 2008 I think if the relationship had a future you guys would figure out a way to live closer together. Maybe not tomorrow but still be working towards that. Link to post Share on other sites
ellie01 Posted February 6, 2008 Share Posted February 6, 2008 I would wait and see how it goes once you get back there, having you back might change his priorities and he might realise what he had and be more committed to the LDR. If he still decides its too hard, move on, he wasn't worth it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author sptu Posted February 6, 2008 Author Share Posted February 6, 2008 firstly thanks for the replies!but should i leave him alone till july???i was thinking of going there, but when i told him that two weeks ago, he said he dont wont to meet me before july, because "of course we will enjoy but then it will be again the same distance" grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr Link to post Share on other sites
TMichaels Posted February 8, 2008 Share Posted February 8, 2008 firstly thanks for the replies!but should i leave him alone till july???i was thinking of going there, but when i told him that two weeks ago, he said he dont wont to meet me before july, because "of course we will enjoy but then it will be again the same distance" grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr It sounds to me like he's saying: "Yeah, things will be great when you're here and we're together, but once you're done with your studies and gone back home, then the geographic distance between us will be a problem for me again." Okay, fair enough... However, the only way long-distance relationships work out is if one or the other of you move so that you can be together. Have the two of you talked about doing that? Best, TMichaels Link to post Share on other sites
Author sptu Posted February 8, 2008 Author Share Posted February 8, 2008 aaa his answer to that, is that if we had lived together it would be different!now, form the beginning of this relationship we are far!!!!and actually i am planning to move there but i am only 21 and i cant take such a big decision right now!again sorry for my english! Link to post Share on other sites
TMichaels Posted February 8, 2008 Share Posted February 8, 2008 aaa his answer to that, is that if we had lived together it would be different!now, form the beginning of this relationship we are far!!!!and actually i am planning to move there but i am only 21 and i cant take such a big decision right now!again sorry for my english! Okay, but if you always have been apart, how is it you have a relationship? Best, TMichaels Link to post Share on other sites
Author sptu Posted February 8, 2008 Author Share Posted February 8, 2008 hmm..we liked its other when me met, and we decided to keep meeting as soon as possible!and i have finally the ability to go there for some months to study...but on july!! Link to post Share on other sites
TMichaels Posted February 8, 2008 Share Posted February 8, 2008 hmm..we liked its other when me met, and we decided to keep meeting as soon as possible!and i have finally the ability to go there for some months to study...but on july!! I don't understand. You say the two of you decided to keep meeting as soon as possible, yet you also said when you told your b/f that you wanted to come visit him sooner than wait until July, he wasn't interested. What exactly is the question/problem you're trying to get help with? Best, TMichaels Link to post Share on other sites
Author sptu Posted February 8, 2008 Author Share Posted February 8, 2008 last time that we met, it was on january and he said that he cant have this kind of relationship till july! he proposed speaking like two people who want each other but they cant be together, so as if on july would still like each other, to try again, under normal situation! unfortunately, even if i answered yes, we had a big row because it was like being friends..and now, the last news that i have is that i will go there for some days on march, so as to find accommodation for the summer course(the one in july!!!!) and we said that we will meet and we will see.. i am so much afraid.... i hope i explained correctly! Link to post Share on other sites
TMichaels Posted February 8, 2008 Share Posted February 8, 2008 last time that we met, it was on january and he said that he cant have this kind of relationship till july! he proposed speaking like two people who want each other but they cant be together, so as if on july would still like each other, to try again, under normal situation! unfortunately, even if i answered yes, we had a big row because it was like being friends..and now, the last news that i have is that i will go there for some days on march, so as to find accommodation for the summer course(the one in july!!!!) and we said that we will meet and we will see.. i am so much afraid.... i hope i explained correctly! Okay, I understand now, sptu. I think you should go in March and see how things are between the two of you. The more opportunities the two of you have to be with together, the better chance you will have to determine whether the relationship is one that's worth pursuing. Good luck to both of you. Best, TMichaels Link to post Share on other sites
Author sptu Posted February 9, 2008 Author Share Posted February 9, 2008 isnt is quite biiiig thing to go there only to test?!?!i mean he said that he dont want to be a couple and onthe same time he says that we cant predict what it will happen... really thanks for the replies! Link to post Share on other sites
Author sptu Posted February 10, 2008 Author Share Posted February 10, 2008 i need mooooooooooore opinions... Link to post Share on other sites
Star Gazer Posted February 10, 2008 Share Posted February 10, 2008 How about this: What do YOU want from a relationship? Is she capable of providing that to you now? No. Why settle for something less than what you want and need? Link to post Share on other sites
Author sptu Posted February 10, 2008 Author Share Posted February 10, 2008 well, i am the girl he is the boy!and.. somethimes we have to be happy even with less of what we would like to have..no!? Link to post Share on other sites
Star Gazer Posted February 10, 2008 Share Posted February 10, 2008 somethimes we have to be happy even with less of what we would like to have..no!? Only when it comes to cars, houses, finances, and the like - possessions. When it comes to matters of the heart, one should never settle. Link to post Share on other sites
Author sptu Posted February 11, 2008 Author Share Posted February 11, 2008 i need heeeeeeeeelp! god, i am crying all the time! Link to post Share on other sites
latefragment Posted February 12, 2008 Share Posted February 12, 2008 this sounds really similar to what happened with me! i'm sorry we can't use private message though... I'm not too comfortable sharing all the details but ... all I can say is, I know exactly how you feel. :( reading your post is kind of making me cry too. ..... Link to post Share on other sites
Author sptu Posted February 13, 2008 Author Share Posted February 13, 2008 latefragment!! how are you?! i decided, if you want, to give you my email here but we have to arrange when, so as to delete it!!are you now here?!? Link to post Share on other sites
TMichaels Posted February 13, 2008 Share Posted February 13, 2008 latefragment!! how are you?! i decided, if you want, to give you my email here but we have to arrange when, so as to delete it!!are you now here?!? sptu, You can send a Private Message to latefragment. Simply click on her "Member Name" and select "Private Message" from the drop-down menu. Best, TMichaels Link to post Share on other sites
Author sptu Posted February 13, 2008 Author Share Posted February 13, 2008 i caaaaaaaaaant!!! Link to post Share on other sites
TMichaels Posted February 13, 2008 Share Posted February 13, 2008 If you turn on Private Messages in your profile you should be able to, sptu. Try that. Best, TMichaels Link to post Share on other sites
Author sptu Posted February 14, 2008 Author Share Posted February 14, 2008 ok after tryyyying and trying i cant!!! but anyway, i have some news, i am going there in about a month, even if as he said "we cant predict if we will be fine or not but we will meet for sure". is what he said..i know, its not very...nice, but if you are in love, you dont care of the bad things but only for good!so what i am thinking of right now, is to go there...and of course i am so afraid that he might tell me "ok i dont want !!!!" and what i will do then?!?!i will feel terrible!! anyway, i read that we attract what we feel!so we have to feel nice and good so as to attract the same!!!(considering that on two months i will take English exams, is anyone able to understand what i wrote?!?!?)hehehe kisses and i am waiting for your replies!!! Link to post Share on other sites
TMichaels Posted February 14, 2008 Share Posted February 14, 2008 sptu, Click on "My Profile/CP" in the upper left-hand corner of your screen. Then go to "Settings and Options" which will be located on the left-hand side of your screen. Click on "Edit Options." About half-way down the page there is a check box to indicate whether or not you want to send/receive Private Messages. If you've done all this, I don't know why you wouldn't be able to send Private Messages to those who also have agreed to send/receive them. Best, TMichaels Link to post Share on other sites
Author sptu Posted February 14, 2008 Author Share Posted February 14, 2008 TMichaels!!!! thank u very very much, but i still cant!!!maybe its the other who cant receive messages!!anyway!!!tell me your opinion about going there even if we are not a couple anymore...and what if i go there and nothing happens?!?!?!?!even a kiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiss!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts