Been dating for 5 years.....

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Just need some advice....

I have been dating this wonderful guy for 5yrs now. I met him my freshman year in college and we started dating my senior year and have made it this far. Although we have been together for so long- 2.5 years have been long distance. Overseas actually due to the military...We have exclusive the whole time. This past year, he moved closer and we have been just enjoying the time together and getting used to being close enough to visit on weekends.

The question: I really want to get married! It has been 5 years, but I don't think he is ready. It is due to his career and the military, but I am wondering if it is me. Should I move on? I could not imagine my life w/o him and we have a strong relationship, but I am running out of patience.

We always talk about where we would settle and what we would name our children, and getting engaged just seems so close.

In conversations, he always says "If we get married....." I want the "when we get married"....

Opinions-anybody in this situation?

[Tony T]

I think five years is plenty of time for any person to make a very sure decision on marrying a particular individual. Being in the military is no excuse for putting off a wedding. There are many thousands of militarymen who are married.

 

Best thing to do is to tell him you are looking to get married and you hoped it would be to him. Let him know you aren't hearing real positive signs from him that his thoughts are firmly in that direction. Ask him what his intentions are and let him know you feel it's time for the both of you to make a firm commitment to spending the rest of your lives together...or parting company.

 

It could either be the happiest experience of your life or a heartbreaking one. Either way, you need to know. Life is short and while the two of you love each other a great deal, you need to find someone who wants to put a ring on your finger and walk you down the aisle.