ratingsguy Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 I met a woman on match.com, and we decided to get together this afternoon for a casual drink and something to eat. In my estimation, the date went very well. We conversed for about an hour and a half, and also had a half hour phone conversation a few days prior. We both smiled and laughed a good amount. I had a great time getting to know her, and I think she did too. When we left, I told her that I'd love to see her again. She said to call her and then smiled and extended her hand, which I shook. After that, I put my arms out and we hugged each other then went our separate ways. I plan to call or e-mail her probably on Tuesday (don't want to come off too eager). I gotta wonder though... what do you guys think about a date that ends in a handshake. Is it someone's body language for, "I had a good time, but I'm not interested in seeing you again."? Link to post Share on other sites
Winfield Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 Admittedly, a handshake is a strange way to end a date - but on a first meet, it can be very difficult to read / gauge the other party... Maybe she didn't want to come across as too forward, or wanted you to take the lead - how did she react when you initiated the hug? Did she hang back / was she hesitant? She said for you to call her - IMO, it could have been worse if she completely avoided the subject of "calls" when it was brought up, so, take her at her word, call her, and see what happens! Good luck! Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 what do you guys think about a date that ends in a handshake. Is it someone's body language for, "I had a good time, but I'm not interested in seeing you again."? What do you think ?.. I think it is just what you posted and I quoted... Link to post Share on other sites
norajane Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 The handshake meant you were a complete stranger that she met online and she didn't think it was a good idea to kiss a complete stranger she just met. If you think the date went very well, and she smiled and said to call her, then call her! Link to post Share on other sites
monkey00 Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 I say call her if you're interested and you think she's interested in seeing you again, got nothing to lose right? Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 I say call her if you're interested and you think she's interested in seeing you again, got nothing to lose right? I think Monkey is right.. since a handshake could mean a few things the only way to know is call her and go on a second date... Personally all the dates I have had that ended with a handshake or a hug bombed out within a couple of dates.. All the relationships I have had that worked out, the first date ended with at least a good kiss.. Link to post Share on other sites
Walk Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 we conversed for an hour and a half, and also had a half hour phone conversation a few days prior I can't kiss someone I've talked to for only 2 hours. That's way too intimate for me. It shocks me that others think sucking face after knowing someone for 2 hours is normal, or that it should be a sign of disinterest if I don't want to swap spit with you. Maybe that's just me? Maybe I'm the weird one here? Anyway... not every one is comfortable with touchy feely contact after just meeting someone for the first time. Ask her out again. If she flakes on you, then she's not interested. But at least give her 5 hours before you expect her to lock lips with you. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 Just call her in afew days! Don't analyze the handshake as it could mean many things... Link to post Share on other sites
D-Lish Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 Yeah, it's hard to say what it means. Sometimes that initial good bye is just awkward. I wouldn't be kissing someone I just met either. What did your instinct tell you? Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 Also, meeting someone 'online' still kind of freaks some out. Yes, so many people are on various dating sites, but having that first connection online and not face to face, whether it be a set-up, or meeting someone at a party - the online factor (I think) will always be weird at first. Link to post Share on other sites
sarayanna Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 I did my share of online dating last year and almost never kissed on the first date. In fact, if the guy moved in for a kiss when we had known eachother only two hours, I would be a bit put off by it. She reciprocated the hug and told you to call. I think that is a pretty good indication. She sounds respectable and probably expects you to be a gentleman. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ratingsguy Posted February 11, 2008 Author Share Posted February 11, 2008 (edited) Personally all the dates I have had that ended with a handshake or a hug bombed out within a couple of dates.. But you got a second date! That's good news right there. Thanks everyone for your advice. She did indicate that her friends convinced her to join match.com and she's fairly new to internet dating, so I guess she was just treading carefully. Overall, I think the date went really well, but I never know what to expect. I've been surprised a lot in the past in both directions. Either I'm terrible at reading people or women I come accross hold the cards close to their chest. She also admitted after saying to call her that she "didn't know what the protocol is"... lol. Take that for what it's worth. She did seem slightly nervous, but I think I made her feel more and more comfortable as the date progressed. Edited February 11, 2008 by ratingsguy Link to post Share on other sites
D-Lish Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 I would definetely give her a call on Tuesday then. You really don't have anything to lose! I don't think you have a choice if you like her.... you have to make the call. Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 It doesn't necessarily means she is not interested.. maybe she works in a professional environment with men.. and the handshake is an automatic way to end a meeting with someone... or maybe she just didn't know what to do to end the 'date'.. *awkward moment*.. Give her a call then you'll know if she is interested or not.. if the date went well, you have no reason to think she might not want to see you again. Link to post Share on other sites
monkey00 Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 It doesn't necessarily means she is not interested.. maybe she works in a professional environment with men.. and the handshake is an automatic way to end a meeting with someone... or maybe she just didn't know what to do to end the 'date'.. *awkward moment*.. Give her a call then you'll know if she is interested or not.. if the date went well, you have no reason to think she might not want to see you again. I agree, I've had dates with girls that ended with them taking the initiative to avoid an awkward moment. Who said girls weren't allowed to be nervous/shy on dates? Link to post Share on other sites
AriaIncognito Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 I'd say she was just nervous. I dont think I've ever given a kiss kiss on the 1st date. I had a first date last weekend and felt extremely awkward when it came down to the possibility of dealing with a kiss happening. I think some of us are just old fashioned and want to wait a date or two before jumping in. I'm usually ready by date 2 lol. I say call her. It sounds like you both had a good time. Link to post Share on other sites
gfto Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 A handshake doesn't tell us anything. The only way to get a better read on her interest is to call her for a second date. Link to post Share on other sites
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