pinkrazr Posted February 14, 2008 Share Posted February 14, 2008 (edited) AAAAUUGH! I know I'm insecure... REALLY insecure. but I want to know if my boyfriend is always just using that against me. of If hes mostly right. A few examples. He has a bunch of female friends he used to hang with, but when he started dating 2 years ago. he drifted from them, they drifted as well. I told him to bring them out some time. he's met ALL my friends. why cant i meet his? The only place he talks to them is on Messenger. But tells me he rarely speaks to them. and doesnt seem to make plans with all of us. He used to put a picture of us up on his messenger all the time when we first started dating. he was so happy to be seen with me. I asked him the other day, if he could do it again. I missed the old times. He FLIPPED on me. told me I'm so "F-bomb'n" Insecure. he said "NO! this is MY messenger, I can put whatever I want on it. do you want me to put a pic of you in my wallet and show every person i meet on the street that your my girlfriend". and so on and so on with the like. I just started to cry by his reaction. Then in anger, he brought up how I made him stop talking to his ex. they were friends. but she wanted him to go visit her.... she moved out of the country.... visit her? He declined, yes. because he knew it wasn't right to do that. but then he blamed me now for not talking to her.... why is she so damn special? Then in the summer we were talking about relationships. he told me he was a total jerk to her the whole 6 years they dated. I said to him "you never admit to me when your a jerk... why would you tell me you were to your ex, but in our fights. your always right". Well right there, was another blowup. I dont know If i made that happen, because he has feelings for her still? or... I was being pissy?. It's so hard to figure out what the hell is wrong. We spend every weekend together, talk every day. I've had boyfriends that cheated on me... one actually laughed in my face that he was doing it. I'm scarred. am I being Legit? or am I mixing my past with my present? taking small things and just living off assumptions? HELP! Edited February 14, 2008 by pinkrazr spelling error Link to post Share on other sites
Pikaia Posted February 14, 2008 Share Posted February 14, 2008 Hi Pinkrazr, Thanks for responding to my thread!!! Honey, I am so sorry you are dealing with someone who isn't very sensitive to your feelings. Sounds like he really doesn't care a lot about how you feel at all! You need to sit down and have a serious talk. Don't blow up, don't get angry, just talk rationally and calmly. Tell him exactly how you feel. Tell him how hurt you are and how much you want this to work. Tell him you want to meet his friends and ask him honestly why he doesn't want this to happen. About the ex situation, I know there are a lot of people who have soft spots for some of their exes. I know I do. But, it's not acceptable to take a trip to see one without inviting YOU. I'm glad he made the decision not to go. The most important thing in a realtionship is communication. You seem like you are trying to communicate and let him know what's going on in your head. If you feel insecure, tell him. You are doing the right thing. Now you need to approach him and say, "We need to work on things." Hopefully he's willing to make the effort. Best of luck to you! I really do sympathize with your insecurities and problems. Link to post Share on other sites
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