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Giving her space


bobby shashastra

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bobby shashastra

Hey guys + girls, I'm a new member here so I'm not to sure about where I should post this.

 

Anyhow, I've had this friend for around a year now and we've become rather close. She's cute, funny, really smart (like freaky smart) and sharp as a tack. We flirt a lot (one of our favourite games recently is chatting about how neither of us will ever have a chance with the other) and she has all the right moves when it comes to her body language.

 

So as most guys do, I've developed a slight crush on her, and as most guys do I think I'm starting to hurt our friendship with my behaviour. A while back I had it on good authority from one of my friends that she was harbouring a crush on me. The problem was at that time I had no interest in her.

 

Later I started crushing on her and acting a little too needy. Usually I called or txted her once a week and we chatted on just that day, and if she and I both wanted we'd head out for lunch or something. But recently I couldn't help myself and began calling a little more.

 

She seemed okay, but this week she was rather mad, snapped at me and told me to "Stop harassing [her]!", after that I apologised.

 

This was yesterday and I've decided that she really needs some space and for whatever reason I made her mad. I don't want to jump straight to PMS like most guys do, but I'm aware that that is a possibility seeing as her anger was totally out of the blue.

 

So I'm wondering how long should I wait before I call her again, I was thinking 2-3 weeks but I'd like you guy's thoughts. I don’t really care if I never get with her, I’d just like to keep our friendship, that’s what’s most important to me.

 

Thanks.

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Does she have your number? Does she ever call you, or it always you who's initiating contact?

 

Personally, I'd wait on her getting back to you - even friendships (never mind relationships) have to work both ways...

 

After all, it's only fair!

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Does she have your number? Does she ever call you, or it always you who's initiating contact?

 

Personally, I'd wait on her getting back to you - even friendships (never mind relationships) have to work both ways...

 

After all, it's only fair!

 

That's a good point. I have heard stories of people out growing their friendships with people and moving on, I'm not advocating this at all, but it's a possibility. Maybe she knows you have a crush on her and maybe it's her way of telling you to back off a little.

 

Even so, I'd let her get back to you when she is ready to strike a conversation.

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Whether 20 or 80, there's no harm in a little silence. Hard advice to follow, I know LOL.

 

Her response to you may have nothing to do with you, rather with something else going on in her life. I'd suggest silence and not taking it personally. She knows where to find you :)

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Since she was the one who lashed out at you- I'd wait for her to contact you. Something spooked her.

 

Either she is feeling pressured by you, or she was having a bad day. Either scenario leaves her to do the contacting.

 

If she is feeling "harassed"... then you want to leave her be...any further attempts to repair things from your end could and would probably backfire.

 

If she is just having a rough patch- then she owes you a phone call and an apology. I don't see any other option here... I'd leave her be and wait for her to contact you. If she doesn't- then a relationship/friendship isn't likely going to be an option anyway.

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