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Insecure or justified


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Long story short, I've been dating this guy for a little more than seven months. We didn't really intend on dating but we clicked and well nature took it's course from there. As the feelings got deeper we both had to admit that we were slightly insecure from hurts of past relationships. So as for proclaimations of love, we decided to take it slow. Now he has been all but staying at my place for the past three months. He only lives down the street but spends more time at my house than his. He's slept at my house every night for the past three months.

 

Now we have had some problems at the beginning with his ex. She hacked into his email and started sending nasty grams to me. According to him and his mother, she is very vindicative and generally not a good person. So we had like two weeks where she sent nasty IMs saying he was doing this and that. All untrue as I was able to call her bluff on several scenarios.

 

After that I found some emails from him to other females flirting. I explained to him that I didn't find that appropriate and it hurt to see that. That it made me feel like I was inadequate sexually in our relationship. He said he did just cuz he was bored and left to his own devices.

 

This morning he jumped on the computer real quick before we ran out the door. When I came down the stairs he quickly started clicking his way to secrecy. He didn't close out his email. I happened to check the email (after the flirting thing, my trust is real ify). It was an email to his ex. In it he is denying our relationship and stating that he is just "using her to get by for now".

 

So I confronted him this morning. He claims he is threw with her and that he is just trying to keep her out of his business. Any suggestions?

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Any suggestions?

 

Yeah find a new boyfriend. He's telling his exGF he's using you to get by?

 

That's low. Even if it's not true why would he say something so disrespectful about you?

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He is lying, he wrote that because that is how he feels.

 

You know he would never accept that from you, why are you accepting it from him then?

 

He wrote to his ex "he is using you to get by".

 

Unless he had a gun to his head and someone told him to write that, you need to dump this guy.

 

Words are not interpretable, they are physical things that are there for you to seee proof he is doing you so wrong. Please don't turn your back on the hardest proof you will see. Aside from seeing him having sex with another girl.

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I am doubtful on any decision since previous issues with her have almost landed her and I in a physical confrontation. At this point I am wondering if she is just really that much of a psycho that he can't shake her or if he's just lying.

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it doesn't matter if he just "told her that to get her away", what he should have said to get her away is say "leave me and my new gf alone, i love her and don't want you in my life"

what a jerk!!!!!!! dump him if you haven't already done so

and tell his mom :lmao:

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Yeah, just drop him. I wouldn't have even bothered telling him what you found. I'd have sat him down and told him you needed to call it quits because you were just using him to get by and have since found someone better.

 

Tom Petty says "don't come around here no more" and so should you. Stop being his motel.

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heidilynnmorris

Wow! Are we dating the same guy! lol j.k. I have been dealing with this issue for over 4 years now. My current bf's ex is the same exact way she hacked into his e-mail and did the same thing to me. Although, I know how you feel you may be completely in love with the guy as I am, but trust me it will never get better. I have a child with my bf and that makes things more complicated. I have a hard time trusting my bf because in the past he did try playing games with both me and his ex. He tells me shes crazy and he just says things to get her off his back and he's even told his parents that she is pyscho and won't leave us a lone but I still have my doubts that he has feelings for her which is putting a damper on our relationship. I'm really sorry for how you must feel because I've been there and no the feeling!

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